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Original poster

To ask what age you were when you found undeniable love?

98 replies

Sandyshores13 · 29/12/2020 10:02

I'm 34 and had 3 serious relationships lasting

3 years
2 years
8.5 years.

I've always thought I was in love. Although not so much the middle relationship. He wasn't a nice person. Very immature and we were young. But definitely with my first. With my third I felt like I had found the one. We had Alot of lovely times together. But it fizzled out and it was sad. But we just were not quite right together and ended up negative constantly.

I've now met someone and I feel like I finally understand what it is all about. I liked him from one conversation. Then we had a few more. Then I didn't see him for a while. but in that time I never forgot him. Then our paths crossed again 3 months ago. We ended up confessing exactly the same thing to eachother. We had liked eachother instantly. He is 13 years older and said he's never felt what he has for me.

We've been inseparable this last couple of months. It's hard because of covid but we meet up for what we can. We have exactly the same views on things. He says what I think and visa versa. I've never been so comfortable with anyone before.

Last week he said he loved me and I said it back. Because I feel exactly the same. I have never felt so close to anyone before. I've never felt so happy. I've never felt so comfortable. His personality is so balanced for me. He's all the things I love in a person and ive never had that with anyone. He makes me laugh so much. We both have the same humour. But we can both talk seriously. He is affectionate but gives me abit of banter too.

I don't think this would ever happen again in this lifetime. I wonder whether some people ever find it. It just got me curious to what age were you when it finally clicked with someone?

I have realised my whole twenties I just settled and never found a real connection with anyone.

Sorry if this post is sickly. But I'd love to know when other people experienced a really strong click with someone and realised that it was the first time?

OP posts:
madcatladyforever · 29/12/2020 11:42

I thought I found it at 40 with my 2nd husband but he turned out to be a dud like the one before.

TreacleHart · 29/12/2020 11:45

Met at 17 , married at 19 , grew apart, divorced 19 years later .

LemonSherbetFancies · 29/12/2020 11:45

Lucky enough to have had 2 soul mates but later on in life. In my forties and now again in my fifties.
When I was younger I thought I had love but I didn't really realise it was not.
The love I have with my partner is more than I could have dreamed of. So unbelievably happy.

ZeldaPrincessOfHyrule · 29/12/2020 11:46

I was 19, he was 20. We're still together 20 years later.

x2boys · 29/12/2020 11:51

31 ,I met Dh we were married within 6 months everyone thought it wouldn't last to soon etc ,but we are coming up for 16 years now .

PeppaPigMakesMeGrrrrr · 29/12/2020 11:51
  1. 2nd marriage. Now have the kind of equal marriage I saw others having and which used to make me wonder why my (1st) marriage was so hard.
Oldsu · 29/12/2020 11:57

Met my first love when I was 16 married him when I was 17 and 48 years later we are still happily married

SonjaMorgan · 29/12/2020 11:59

Late twenties. I don't think I knew as soon as I met my DH. At first we were friends and there was lust. In previous relationships the lust would wane and I would notice all the annoying things about them. I would then begin to dislike them and would think about how my life would be better single. But with DH, although he isn't perfect I have never felt like that. I can't imagine my life without him.

AriesTheRam · 29/12/2020 12:01

33

Glitterblue · 29/12/2020 12:02

I was 25. I'd been in a 5 year relationship but it was different. 19 years later we are still together, married for 15.5 years.

Lightwindows · 29/12/2020 12:02

31

ashmts · 29/12/2020 12:08

@Descant

OP, in the nicest possible way, you’re two months into a new relationship — of course you feel loved up and fabulous, and it’s nice that you do. But your neurology is bathing you in dopamine. See where you are in two years, when this very new relationship has started to be tested by time.
I agree with this. Not to burst your bubble OP but I really think this is only the kind of thing you know with hindsight.
MrsToothyBitch · 29/12/2020 12:10

  1. Aged 18-22. My uni BF and my first love, where there's a lot right but not enough and life takes you down different paths. He was a wonderful, lovely man but we wanted different things in life in the grand scheme. It broke my heart to leave- but I was right to do it, though it took a long time to get over (appalling, traumatic guilt) and I occasionally questioned myself and my sanity in leaving. Knowing people like him existed saw me through years of sifting through shit dates though. I knew good ones existed.

  2. Aged 26. Not quite true love but a profound experience. I fell for someone who I know didn't love me. It just happened. He was a friend. He liked me but not enough. I was so angry with myself and really fought it because I knew it was shit and I'd end up hurting! It spurred me into online dating to try and get over him though! I eventually did and it eventually worked which brings me to..

  3. Aged 29 with DP. Met OLD but knew in 5 minutes when we met. I want him forever.

Actupfishy · 29/12/2020 12:11

32; was smitten from the get go, I just ‘knew’ 3 years in and still going strong, I know he is my person.

knittingaddict · 29/12/2020 12:14

Knew him as a friend for a few months, dated for 3 months, engaged for 3 months and married for 36 years and still happily together.

I had no doubts at all when we married despite the speed it happened, but i realise that it might have been a huge mistake.
We've been through a lot the last 10 years, but we are still best friends and love each other more than we did 36 years ago.

It's not all chocolate box perfection. We argue and get on each other's nerves sometimes, but the foundation is solid.

LittleTiger007 · 29/12/2020 12:18

I only properly found love 2 and a half years ago when I met my husband. I had relationships which always involved a partial compromise of what I really wanted. In my last relationship I really loved him passionately... and we clicked as friends. We got engaged, but there were little red flags such as his occasional lies and petty controlling.
It wasn’t until I was in my 40s and I had had my adventures and I truly knew who I was and what I wanted. I was at peace with me... when I met a man who similarly was at peace with himself. We clicked. Like you describe it was easy and it was as though we had known each other for ever. After 8 months we were married. When you know you know! Now I am 20 weeks pregnant. I’ve never felt this way about anyone. True love eventually found me.
Good luck OP I hope it works out. Flowers

LunaNorth · 29/12/2020 12:21

33, but nothing came of it. We spent four days together and I never saw him again.

But within a year it happened again, with someone else. I feel like the first guy was put in my way to show me how love should feel. This time I was able to act on it and he’s now my adored husband.

cuppycakey · 29/12/2020 12:24

I was about 6. His name was Jason, and he was about 5.

He was a beautiful Rough Collie and I fell in love with him the moment I looked into his beautiful brown eyes Grin

Undeniable love.

Original poster
Sandyshores13 · 29/12/2020 12:25

It's not a bubble. I've had experience of the honeymoon stage before. This is different. These are feelings beyond sex and kissing. We are connected on a really high level. Our morals. Our opinions. The type of holidays we like. The food we like. Our humour. The things we've been through. The way we see the world. Music. Television. Our kids and how we see parenting. The sort of life we'd both enjoy.

It's really isn't just pwoar. He's actually beautiful to me. But no he's not drop dead gorgeous or model like. He's getting lines and going grey. He has scars and has a different experience in life to me when he was younger. But I still feel absolutely amazing around him. He's just lovely. He's able to stick up for himself and he's in quite a male orientated job. but he has been raised to respect people. He is polite to everyone. He's really respectful to me. He just has a really nice traditional feel around him. I know some of the feelings will fade over time. But we've started talking about things we want to do together and I feel like we are going to be really happy in eachothers company.

I already know things about him That are flaws. But I don't want perfect. I want someone I can really connect with and k feel that's what I've found.

OP posts:
maras2 · 29/12/2020 12:26
  1. He was 19. Sounds daft but it really was 'love at first sight' We're still together, me 67 him 71, still mad about each other. Smile
Original poster
Sandyshores13 · 29/12/2020 12:28

@maras2

That's lovely. I think it's rare but can happen. How lovely that you've been complete from such a young age. X

OP posts:
FatGirlShrinking · 29/12/2020 12:30

We've been together 20 years and married for 14 of those.

WoolieLiberal · 29/12/2020 12:34

20 when I met DH, who was also 20.

Up to then I had had several teen boyfriends who were all like immature kids. DH was the first who I met who didn’t treat me like a trophy and talk to me like a dog.

calamityjam · 29/12/2020 14:52
  1. He luckily felt the same. I remember bursting into tears one day because I loved him so much. We got married but after 6 years he took his own life because of untreated bipolar disorder which he refused help for numerous times. I literally did everything to get him help including trying to get him sectioned a few times, nobody took me seriously that his life was in imminent danger. I still love him very much and our son looks more like him every day now he is 20
OliveToboogie · 29/12/2020 15:06
  1. Had been married 20 plus years separated. Was on my own for 3 years then met my partner. He is love of my life I adore him. We have been together 7 years.