Should I give my neighbours the heads up?

[SozzaBozza]

I've named changed because I'm admitting to breaking the laws of the land here

We are having our Xmas day today (as in having one other household over to celebrate and doing the whole Xmas day thing which we haven't done any other day).

The reason being we have a family child who is terminally ill and they have been in treatment for the last month - today is the only day we could have possibly done something. We are taking KS1 age and It will be their last Christmas.

Anyway I'm not particularly asking if we are being unreasonable to break the rules because honestly in this instance I just don't care, nor do her parents and this is what she wants.

What I want to know is if it would be better to let my neighbours know ahead of them arriving so they don't all think WTF or report us or whatever else.

We don't know the neighbours particularly well - we only moved in a year ago and due to all of the lockdowns we just haven't had much chance to meet.

Thoughts?

@Doodlepip23

Have a wonderful belated Christmas celebration today!

This

It's not Christmas 'day' that was allowed; it was any one 'day' over the original period.

I hope you have a wonderful Christmas celebration with your family. I would like to think the neighbours will not only understand, they'll wish you all well.

Just do it and don’t tell them. Lots of people have bent or broke the rules over Xmas, and I’ve yet to hear of anyone being reported, or if they were I’ve not seen or heard of evidence of police visits. So don’t worry about it - enjoy your day.

I wouldn't say anything. You don't know them well enough to drop it into a chat. And if they are being strict, they won't appreciate you coming to their door.
Plus, it's easy for them to pretend they haven't noticed you breaking the rules but if you make them discuss it then, in a way, you're making them complicit.

@2020isalmosthindsight

It's not Christmas 'day' that was allowed; it was any one 'day' over the original period.

I hope you have a wonderful Christmas celebration with your family. I would like to think the neighbours will not only understand, they'll wish you all well.

Actually it depends where you are. It was any one day in NI but in Britain it was Christmas day.

What did the neighbours say OP?

I can't imagine being anything but supportive. I hope you have a great day.

Good luck OP and I hope you all have an amazing day and that your neighbours are sound about it!

What ever you decide. I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas together

@Frownette

No. Where do people get so much time to be watching out for neighbours? Weird.

It's hardly like you're planning to do a rave.

Hope day is lovely.

How would you not notice if your neighbours were having a large gathering? Do you not go outside or have windows?

Granted you might be out while it was happening but do you really not understand that normal people are aware on a daily basis of things happening outside their houses?

I think your DH handled it wonderfully. I hope you have a nice day

Nice to let them know, no one would begrudge you this day. Have a wonderful day xxx

I hope you all have a lovely day. As your neighbour I probaby would not have noticed but would appreciate your dh calling over.

I would have the family day but also tell the neighbours the circumstances.

You are completely entitled to do this and I would let the neighbours know. I'm sure they'd be fine but would save any unnecessary hassle. I've been quite irritated by some of our neighbours completely ignoring the rules but like others have said, I'd be bending over backwards to help you have the best day possible if I were aware of the circumstances.

Sending love and prayers your way.

Drop a note round. God forbid they are moronic enough to think anything other than kind thoughts.

I woukdn feel a need to explain or justify myself to a neighbour .... we are not (quite) living in a dictatorship yet.

I am so sorry foe your situation and hope your DC gets pleasure and love from the visit.

I agree with Toohard I would not go cap in hand to neighbours for permission either.

If they did report the police would back off immediately anyway

How very sad OP.

Wishing you as lovely a day as possible.

How sad and I don't blame you. You don't need to explain yourself to anyone. Who will neighbours report you to? The police? They won't follow up. They don't have the resources to respond to petty curtain twitchers

Where do you live? Are they likely to notice. If in a city on quite a busy street, I wouldn't bother. I hope you have a really special day and the child in question has a wonderful day too.

You could just put a note through the door x

It's not Christmas 'day' that was allowed; it was any one 'day' over the original period

That only applied in NI. Everywhere else in the UK it was unfortunately restricted to Christmas Day .

I’ve yet to hear of anyone being reported, or if they were I’ve not seen or heard of evidence of police visits

Never a shift goes by at the moment where we don't have several reports of people breaking the rules. Very often its people jumping to conclusions though & getting their facts wrong. But in the OPs situation even if it was reported i can't imagine the Police would enforce anything. I know my shift have used their discretion in cases a lot less severe than the OPs

Enjoy your Christmas Day 🎄