Friend gave her present back to SIL

[Tsubasa1]

A close friend of mine got given a handbag for Christmas by her partners' sister. She told me it was horrible and she gave it back to SIL (not sure what reason she gave to SIL). She also got given a wallet and top by SIL and is considering returning them to her as she doesn't like them either. I told her I thought it was rude, but even the other friend in my WhatsApp group agrees with her. Aibu to think this is bonkers? Is this a new thing now to not accept a gift if you don't like it?

I wouldn't want a friend like this and haven't ever found one like this in real life but they do seem to be rife on MN

@Whatwouldscullydo

Why would you tell your family about a relationship that your partner won't tell anyone about either. Its embarrassing having to make excuses as to why normal things like visiting family together or sending a joint card is seemingly mot possible. I know I couldn't be arsed to have to answer 20 questions from.my parents as to why I had ti arrive somewhere separately or keep a secret...

Coyrse u know her best so maybe shoe does like the drama.. only she k.lws that

Why would you be in a relationship like that, or indeed any you couldn't tell your family about?

Why would you be in a relationship like that, or indeed any you couldn't tell your family about

Well strangely they appear to be....

Maybe they are well suited that way who knows...

@ArtieFufkinPolymerRecords they have told all their friends except for SIL. She didn't tell her mum because she doesn't want to, nothing to do with OH!

I don't think I believe that backstory. Sounds like your friend is trying to justify her actions.

I find it unbelievable that they're so scared to tell the SIL that they're together in case they are threatened, but she goes to the effort of making an extra dish for dinner and gives quite a lavish set of gifts.
Then you add that friend hasn't told her mother either (or am I misreading). The common denominator here is your friend, so I suspect it's your friend who doesn't want them telling and has made up the threatening stuff to justify it.
SIL clearly knows they are together, so if she was going to be nasty she would be anyway.
Surely if that back story was real she wouldn't have wanted to go to their house anyway.

[quote Tsubasa1]@Nanny0gg I don't want to piss her off, I've already pointed out how nice of SIL to cook all that food and I told her it's rude to return a gift. No need to go beyond that![/quote]
Apart from starting an internet thread to revel in other people's drama you mean?

The pair of them sound a bit batshit

But what are you getting out of this thread?

Your friend sounds charming. Her behaviour tells you a lot about the type of person she is. You can't tell her how dreadful her behaviour is. Is this really a person you want to be close friends with?

I wonder why your friend bothered to go to her sister in law's for Christmas if they have a toxic history. There was no need and then there would have been no need to give back the gift, which was OTT hostility.

It never ceases to amaze me just how many people these days appear to have been dragged up in the gutter, and have never been taught basic manners.

One of the earliest lessons I remember from my parents is that receiving unwanted presents is what white lies were made for. You accept the gift and thank the giver no matter how much you dislike whatever it is they've given you.

I had it done to me by a relative in regard to a gift I gave their child. All it did is solidify to me the reason I can’t abide them.

I was always taught that a gift is a gift regardless of whether it's to your taste or not. You never, ever return it just because you don't like it/it doesn't fit or whatever. Just smile and say thank you. Wait a respectable length of time and then gift it to charity shop.

Very rude behaviour.

If I did buy said friends gifts..... I would not be continuing to do so.....

Shockingly bad manners to give back gifts that have been bought for you, People with this attitude do not deserve any gifts. People who say that their gifts are shit and crap are just low brow and nasty.