When people ask “what did you get?”

[CardoMondo]

I HATE this!! It’s so bloody grabby and presumptuous ... like Christmas is all about “what did you get?”. Do you ask people this after Christmas? It annoys me so much.
Do people ever stop to think that maybe the person they’re asking didn’t receive fuck all and now they feel awkward at having been asked about it?
In my family ... DH wanted a new tv so he ordered one and we said it was his Christmas present. He asked me what I wanted but I couldn’t be arsed to think of anything and he knows I’m not bothered about receiving anything so I got fuck all 😂 I’m going to tell him to order me a Fitbit thing for my dog as my present ... preferably in the sale. Now if anyone asks me “what did DH get you” I’d have to say “nothing” “what did you get DH?” “A £2k telly”

Sounds fucking terrible but it isn’t!!

I’m dreading people asking this stupid fucking question “what did you get!”

I have a friend who asks this every birthday/Christmas. I find it slightly bizzare, as no other friends have asked this since Secondary school!

Definitely with you on this OP.

OP

What a childish question.

Get? GET?
How old are these people?

It never fails to surprise me how people on MN can find offence in just about anything! Where I'm from it's a very standard non personal or 'grabby' question because where I'm from it's usual to exchange presents. I think we probably have a fundamentally different culture around Christmas to what I read on here!
Loads of people would say things like 'did you get anything nice?' Or 'hope Santa was good this year? ' etc and the reply might be oh yes - I was really lucky & got some lovely things- and perhaps mention 1 gift prob from dc. Or..We had a great day thanks & we only did token presents for each other as we're going away on a trip or whatever
No one really cares or judges. At least not in my group of friends & family. It's a social convention - making conversation. Nothing more. I might ask or be asked a similar question in the summer - 'you heading away this year?' Or 'any plans for holidays?' I don't get offended over that either irrespective of whether we will be going anywhere or not.
It must be tiring to find irritation in so much of normal day to day interaction.

As for the professionally worthy brigade - how ridiculous to say that couples who buy gifts for each other are unhappy & pretending for the benefit of showing off on social media!

I would suggest the opposite in that case & say all marriages where the couples take no interest in each other to buy a thoughtful & meaningful gift are dull & staid & not good relationships if they just don't bother making each other feel special. See how stupid that sounds?

I don't know why people feel the need to make such prouncements? Insecurity?

Anyway for what it's worth & in case anyone's wondering, I got some lovely gifts thanks & Santa was very good to me this year. And he was to dh too

For people in healthy adult relationships, the answer is "oh we don't bother much with presents for us".

^. Really, I always bother, love buying people presents and love getting something nice from family, whether it be something extravagant or a little card made by one of the DCs.

To me not bothering says more about a relationship than putting yourself out and thinking about what would bring a smile to someone's face when they open it.

It's not the buying of presents that makes me think the relationship is unhealthy, it's the women people who need to tell you how wonderful their DP is because he buys expensive presents and on the whole, people do only ask what you got so they can tell you what they got.

Lovely thoughtful presents are a nice thing between the two of you, bragging about them makes me wonder who you're convincing.

This is a standard question amongst work colleagues when we return after Christmas. Its like a competition where the amount of money spent on the present equates with who's DH is the most amazing or who is loved most. It makes me want to cringe. One colleague always has an elaborate list of expensive gifts she likes to brag about but her DH is a controlling arse who makes her miserable and the gifts are more for his ego so he can say 'look I am amazing because I bought my wife this and this.'

You’d think the standard question would be ‘Did you have a nice Christmas?’.

The first thing my MIL said to me yesterday was ‘Well then... what did YOU get?’ her voice full of expectation. She always makes sure she has everyone’s attention before asking this question. She also asks this on birthdays, Valentine’s Day and Mothers’ Day.

I told my husband I really didn’t want unnecessary tat just for the sake of it, so he bought me a book he knew I’d like. He was so worried about what others would say that I gave him a couple of things to wrap up that I’d treated myself to - a skincare set and a pair of slippers. A ridiculous farce!