To be a little relieved by the new restrictions around xmas?

[Ohdoleavemealone]

I hate having plans lingering in the air. Hate the uncertainty of can I see my family or can't I.

DS came home from school yesterday having to isolate until xmas eve so yet again we were on the fence of whether or not we could visit family boxing day. We cancelled my parents but they kept saying "lets see". Now Boris has said only mix on xmas day I can accept it and move on.

Am I the only one thinking it would have been kinder in some ways to say this from the start?

@KarmaNoMore

But I agree that the government has been utterly irresponsible by announcing a relaxation of rules for Christmas and getting everyone’s hopes up as they could see the infection curve raising so quickly.

But then...that’s Boris through and through, popularity over welfare.

Also agreed!

But you could have decided if you did not want the uncertainty of knowing whether you'd have to cancel because of isolating to not plan anything anyway; and you would be in the same position as now. You didn't need the PM to screw everyone over in the process to alleviate your apprehension

@Pukkatea

I was desperate to see my family, who I haven't seen since January. I'm now stuck in tier 4 with all plans cancelled. Yes it would have been bloody kinder to say it from the start because this is devastating.

I’ve not seen my mum since Jan either! But she had had part one of a Covid vaccine, needs to get part 2 to be protected.. I couldn’t risk her getting infected from me and DS. We don’t know our status re Covid. Rather have mum alive and seeing her later than not.

Like many others🙂

If you have Covid when you visit for one day or five days the likely hood is you will give it to them.
My children have been isolating so we could see my parents. What a waste of time.

I am sitting in NW and can't believe we weren't somehow put into a tier 5 made specially for us...👀

It's been a rollercoaster ride! Inititially we planned to see my DB, DSil and DNw on the bank holiday monday then had to cancel that when we went into tier 2 and the 5 days were announced. DB booked a hotel for the 22nd to avoid traffic on 23rd as coming from far away and they were to come to us for lunch. Then we went into Tier 3 and their hotel booking was cancelled. Then they managed to get an Air Bnb and we were back on. Then my DD's teacher tested positive for Covid so poor little thing needs to isolate til Boxing day. So lunch was cancelled and we planned that myself and DS would pop over to their Air bnb for breakfast and to swap presents. Now we are in Tier 4 so finally cancelled for good. Very dissapointed as I have Long Covid/post-Covid fatiigue as well as a serious mental illness and really could have done with the support. But we will soldier on

I know what you mean, OP, and I also feel a sort of relief (or at least acceptance).

Our original plan to spend Christmas in Ireland wasn't feasible...OK. So I made lots of other plans, booked some lovely Christmas stuff...which all got cancelled last week. OK, no problem, made alternative plans to meet people outdoors, we're still spending Christmas day with good friends, all good. Then... things are looking worse, lots of kids at school are testing positive, the weather isn't great for being outdoors...OK. Not sure what to tell DS at this point, we might be isolating on Christmas... everyone is unsure what's happening...

At least this way I can legitimately say "Fuck it. I tried, I did my best, but this is out of my hands and I'm not throwing any more effort or creativity at it. If it's shit, it's shit. Pass me a selection box."

@SchrodingersImmigrant

I am sitting in NW and can't believe we weren't somehow put into a tier 5 made specially for us...👀

Same! I'm primed for BoJo to stick us in tier 4 just out of some degree of spite. Can't possibly out tier the southerners, it's just not normal.

My beautiful daughter lives in tier 4 and is quite literally devastated alongside millions of other people I am sure.....I am extremely sad and disappointed that I will now not be able to see her, hug her and talk to her properly.....it's important we all stay as safe as possible irrelevant of the time of year...myself and my husband are both recovering from the virus and it's the most debilitating time we have both fought our way through luckily....stay safe and strong everyone xx

I'm absolutely gutted for people who had made plans, particularly those who had distant family/friends involved who haven't been able to see each other for the best part of a year. I am hugely sympathetic to the people who needed this as a means to help keep hold of hope.

I'm absolutely gutted for my sister who has seen her first grandchild twice since she was born and was desperate to spend some time this Christmas. Her daughter nearly died in childbirth (no exaggeration, she was unconscious for her baby's first day) and desperately needs help and support. I'm devastated for them all.

HOWEVER

I am also relieved that the government has taken some firm action and has finally worked out that they need to try to save lives this Christmas, rather than just save Christmas revenue and the personal image of BoJo, who didn't want to be the PM who cancelled Christmas. I was furious that he didn't change Christmas plans 3 days ago when all the doctors were begging him to. It was all pushed to people to decide for themselves, which is what got us into this terrible mess.

Sorry that some of you are really struggling with the latest announcement but yes, I’m very relieved by the news.

My wonderful very pregnant DIL was planning to travel to visit her mum but she was already very anxious about going on the train. (4 hour journey)

Her mum puts pressure on her every year to visit her on Christmas Day and her dad on Boxing day as they’re divorced. DIL’s been with our son for about 15 years and has NEVER visited us for Christmas.

This news means that she can stay at home and not worry about catching Covid again.

Son has come twice to us on his own but that seems bonkers to me so I’ve always said ‘both of you visit your mum and we’ll see you at another time later in the year.’

We don’t live nearby so it’s always an epic journey either way. We haven’t seen DIL or DS for more than 2 years now due to illness and Covid. Plans have been cancelled twice. However, I’d still rather wait until Spring/Summer when it should be safer to visit.

I agree that they should have announced this earlier, but I think people have to understand this is not personal, it's just to contain the disease and stop hospitals becoming overwhelmed. People should have been sensible in the first place and not arranged to leave home, using common sense. And I say that as someone who hasn't seen two of my adult children since before lockdown as they live too far away and are unable to travel. I will be spending Christmas day with youngest dd who currently lives with me and visiting my mum on boxing day, as she can only see me, as I'm her support bubble.

It's just another day. Better to keep ourselves and relatives safe, so that we can see them when all this is over. But I do understand how difficult this change will be for people who have booked travel, shopped accordingly etc.

I’m gutted. We haven’t seen family all year, don’t live locally to them, and just lost my grandmother. Now I can’t even go and be with my mum and dad and mourn our loss together. We can’t get there and back in a day (6 hour drive). Wish they’d said earlier.

Totally understand. MN for the past few days have been filled with shall we/shouldn't we blah fing blah and yes it would have been kinder you are right but come on any sensible people could see rates rising and thinking actually this might not work???? Things change every day with this virus and everything shit happens yes I feel sorry for everyone who's bought turkeys for 8 etc but these things are bound to happen?! That's what OP is stating I think anyway..

@EdwardBear1920

I'm absolutely gutted for people who had made plans, particularly those who had distant family/friends involved who haven't been able to see each other for the best part of a year. I am hugely sympathetic to the people who needed this as a means to help keep hold of hope.

I'm absolutely gutted for my sister who has seen her first grandchild twice since she was born and was desperate to spend some time this Christmas. Her daughter nearly died in childbirth (no exaggeration, she was unconscious for her baby's first day) and desperately needs help and support. I'm devastated for them all.

HOWEVER

I am also relieved that the government has taken some firm action and has finally worked out that they need to try to save lives this Christmas, rather than just save Christmas revenue and the personal image of BoJo, who didn't want to be the PM who cancelled Christmas. I was furious that he didn't change Christmas plans 3 days ago when all the doctors were begging him to. It was all pushed to people to decide for themselves, which is what got us into this terrible mess.

This 100% ^

@Ohdoleavemealone

I think it's good to have only Christmas day where people can meet, to stop all the inconsiderate and selfish individuals travelling 100s of miles and mixing with 100s of people.

However, saying there is a 5-day window, letting people make all their plans, book leave, pay for trains, book hotels etc, and then say 'nah fuck it ya cannae go!' FOURS DAY BEFORE, is quite cruel, and I wouldn't blame people for going ahead with their plans anyway.

Bit of a risk of getting caught though, and being turned back by police/authorities. And there IS a reasonable chance of that.

Interesting though, that two thirds of people (so far) agree with you.

I am torn as I do agree with you that the restrictions are strict, but think it's horrible to have done it to people with such short notice. I have to say YANBU though, because of what @Ladylimpet said...

"Why anyone has made plans in the middle of a pandemic is beyond me. Anything can change, and does. All this talk of people being devastated? Really? Can't people just be thankful loved ones will be safe... rather than being selfish. I find it really odd people are willing to risk people's health, for the sake of a roast dinner. Bonkers. Devastation is seeing someone you love in a hospital bed. How bad does it have to get for people to realise?"

I suppose it was a bit crazy to have made plans, knowing how things have been changing so much, and so easily. Like the people who booked holidays abroad IMMEDIATELY when restrictions were lifted (in June?) There was no guarantee things wouldn't get bad again, (and they did!) It was foolhardy. That said, I do feel a bit sorry for some people, because, as I said, the short notice is very poor.

I have to admit though - and I know I sound like a bitch but don't care - I am quite amused by how incensed LONDON is at being put into tier 3, and then 4, so they can't do anything or go anywhere, and all non-essential shops are closed, and all the bars etc. I am amused, because they didn't give a SHIT when it happened up north and in the east midlands.

Many people have been tolerating these severe restrictions since MARCH, and the southern softies are pissing and moaning because it's now happening to them. They're like 'just how DARE you?' 'We are LONDON.' 'We are terribly important!' 'You cannot DO this to us.'

Yep they can, so suck it up chums! You are NOT that special!

I am so sad for people whose Christmas plans have been ruined.
Must be bloody awful.

I wish they had announced this weeks ago. This is my first Christmas without Dad so me and my brother had both agreed to go to my Mum for the 5 days, she doesn’t live locally to either of us. I’m in Tier 3, Mum in Tier 2 and brother in another part of the UK (so not yet sure whether new guidelines will be announced for him soon); we all live too far to travel to and from her house in one day and so I’ve said I won’t be able to go down any more but I’m now being guilted by my Mum and brother (who is happy to break the rules and stick to his original 5 day plan) for saying I’m not wanting to visit. I live on my own so my Mum is also worrying about me spending Christmas alone. My mum is saying as we both live alone we can just be each other’s support bubbles, but each of us are already in support bubbles with friends locally so I don’t think that would work.

I feel like if I’d been able to stay from the start I wasn’t visiting it would have been fine but now my family are seeing me wanting to pull out as cancelling and are using the loss of my dad as guilt leverage to break the rules. I feel torn regarding what to do and wish I wasn’t having to disappoint them and make these decisions so close to Christmas.

Am I the only one thinking it would have been kinder in some ways to say this from the start?

I think so. I think it’s cruel to dangle the idea of a relatively normal Christmas in front of people, defend it for fucking weeks and say it will still happen, then snatch that away from them 3 days before the bubble opens. This is after plunging some of the country into a lockdown with no mixing at all, not even Christmas Day. I think 3 days before the bubble starts you are stuck with that decision that you made in November.

However, if this decision was made in November people would not have complied with lockdown 2.0 (less so than they already did).

My tier 4 SIL has said she's coming anyway! (up to Yorkshire)

I agree it’s a relief. The emotional pressure to take the risk was causing huge stress. We are in a T4 area with v high rates and I’ll be glad just to hunker down.

Those saying they’ll ‘do it anyway, nothing will stop my family Xmas’ are morons of the highest order.

I get you OP, it was the uncertainty I found really frustrating

We're in SE London- so Tier 4

Horray for you! 😕

Yabu. I am working on Christmas eve, Christmas day, boxing day and new years eve as well as other days in between looking after other people's loved ones. The day I as going to see my parents with my kids has now gone outbof the window. Many will be devastated. Loneliness kills, the suicide rates are up, the mental health toll with all of this is huge.

I'm relieved OP. Two thirds of DS's (14) year have been sent home in the past week after 4 or 5 positive tests, DD (17) takes 4 buses a day to get to and from college and hangs out with god knows how many kids in between but when we tried to cancel Xmas trip to MIL she wanted to still see us. I totally get that but I'm terrified of us infecting her or worse her partner, who is vulnerable. I initially felt the government was right to let us make our own decisions but as infections have risen this week I've become increasingly worried. It's shit but it's one Christmas and sometimes we do need saving from ourselves.