AIBU that Love Actually makes me want to poke my eyes out? Light hearted.

[Mapletreelane]

Don't get me wrong, I love a good Christmas flick. But I'm seeing a lot of love on social media for Love Actually. Am I the only one who finds it cringey; it stereotypes Britain as posh and middle class, and Hugh Grant's dancing PM is just....horrendously embarrassing, not funny? It has a wealth of our greatest acting talent who manage to sound unnatural and unfunny. Give me Elf any day (And I am not a Will Ferrell fan). I'm seeing so much love for it and I just cannot see the attraction!

YABU- Get a life. Love Actually is one of the greatest Xmas films ever

YANBU - it is a cringefest akin to nails scraping on a blackboard (for those of you old enough to know what a blackboard is)

@Brefugee

Colin Firth’s proposal to a woman who doesn’t even understand him is greeted with joy by her family

But the point is that they both go away and learn the other's language. There are various scenes of Firth learning Portuguese so that he can go over and tell her how he feels. He takes a punt on that, and there is no hint that he's going to do anything awful if she says "sorry, nope". But the reality is that, in her own words "just in case" [you turn up] she has been learning English.

The only thing about that story, as with all the others, is the age gap - and that isn't a Love Actually problem, it is a film industry problem and we should all push back and comment on that and give feedback at that until they start to be a bit more realistic.

The only mention, btw, about Kiera Knightly being pretty is when she says it about herself and some of the comments on this thread about her being so up herself show why other women don't go round saying "oh, how gorgeous am i?"

I can't abide that line. She is beautiful but who says 'i look really pretty'

I can’t abide the line either - but to be fair, she actually says ‘I look quite pretty’ - which simply suggests she thinks she’s scrubbed up well on her wedding day (didn’t we all think that?), and doesn’t go around thinking it about herself every other day of the year.

Poor Kiera - she was only 17 playing an adult role. It has pretty much haunted her ever since!

@MerchantOfVenom

I can’t abide the line either - but to be fair, she actually says ‘I look quite pretty’ - which simply suggests she thinks she’s scrubbed up well on her wedding day (didn’t we all think that?), and doesn’t go around thinking it about herself every other day of the year.

Poor Kiera - she was only 17 playing an adult role. It has pretty much haunted her ever since!

True

Like that hideous line in the holiday about gumption

She is beautiful but who says 'i look really pretty'

Oh don’t be so British.

@tootesuite

She is beautiful but who says 'i look really pretty'

Oh don’t be so British.

just watched The Holiday again... uncut ... just magical 🥰🎉🎄

Oh I love that film! Very Christmassy and I love the balance between romance and humour. I watch it every year.

I cried...just cried it's so beautiful 🎄

* Laura Linney - sacrifices her own happiness to look out for her brother. That is sad and i wish she had someone in her life to look out for her and say "you can be happy too"*

^This. I identify with this storyline, as I have a DB who has serious MH issues. I had to learn that I didn’t have to take responsibility for him all the time. (Though it took having two adopted DDs, one of them with SEN to get to that point.)

The tragedy of this storyline is that she didn’t have to sacrifice herself like this. Her brother was in a psychiatric hospital where he was being taken care of. And surely in reality he wouldn’t have been permitted to call his sister all the time?

All she needed to do was not answer her phone every single time. (Presumably she wouldn’t have turned it off when she went to sleep so why not just switch it off a bit earlier?)

I think the point with the Laura Linney storyline is that she feels responsible and she puts all the pressure on herself. It's how some people are and there is no changing their minds. It is tragic for her, and potentially for Carl the not-boyfriend.

Also, he doesn't indicate that she should abandon her brother, he asks quite rightly if the call will make him better and means "why not take time for yourself?" She then tells her brother she's doing nothing (poor Carl, he's immediately relegated to "nothing") and talks to him. Carl presumably immediately realised that pursuing a relationship with her would mean he was constantly second fiddle to her brother. Brave move on his part, tbh.

The only mention, btw, about Kiera Knightly being pretty is when she says it about herself and some of the comments on this thread about her being so up herself show why other women don't go round saying "oh, how gorgeous am i?"

I don't really get this comment.

Are you saying that good-looking women (or men?) should " go round saying "oh, how gorgeous am i?" Is this the type of social interaction you enjoy?

No i don't think that. But i do think that people know if they're attractive or not.

A pretty young woman saying "oh i look quite pretty, don't i" isn't the vanity that a lot of posters here seem to think. The slightest hint that a woman thinks she's a shade better than average looking and she gets a ton of shit for being vain.

What an odd question though.

But your comment does suggest you think women (and presumably men) should be able to go around saying ‘oh, how gorgeous am I?’. If they actually are good looking, of course.

Which is kind of to my mind. I can’t see that routinely reminding people of how attractive you are, winning you many friends or admirers. Maybe providing such a helpful public service should. But it won’t.

A pretty young woman saying "oh i look quite pretty, don't i" isn't the vanity that a lot of posters here seem to think. The slightest hint that a woman thinks she's a shade better than average looking and she gets a ton of shit for being vain.

I'd say drawing attention to your own perceived good looks is a sign of vanity actually. I mean, what is the point of saying 'Oh I look quite pretty, don't I?" Sounds like fishing for compliments. Would I be allowed to say, "Actually no, you look pretty average to me" if that's what I think? How is one supposed to respond to such a question and what is the point of asking it?

These last few posts show why so many British women are so self-effacing. There’s nothing wrong with looking at a picture of yourself and saying ‘I look quite pretty’, particularly when it was your wedding picture! It would even be fine to say ‘I looked stunning’. There’s no need to hide your beauty under a bushel, or whatever the saying is.

thank you - there is absolutely nothing wrong with thinking or saying that you think you look attractive.

but look at all the shit that gets thrown at young women for posting selfies? or the "oh she's fishing for compliments" if someone asks if they look nice.

much more shit thrown at the Knightley character than Colin who clearly thought he was god's gift to women, but looking decidedly average or below.

but look at all the shit that gets thrown at young women for posting selfies? or the "oh she's fishing for compliments" if someone asks if they look nice.

Saying 'I look quite pretty, don't I?" regarding a photo of yourself taken weeks (?) ago isn't 'asking if you look nice'. It's asking for confirmation of your perceived attractiveness. So yes, fishing for compliments.

I've known many gorgeous men - and women - in my time. None of them have felt the need to go around looking for validation of their hotness.

Totally agree Brefugee. Physical beauty is fleeting, enjoy it, I say!

The justification for why average Colin got together with beautiful American women upthread is laughable.

Really?! My SM is full of people posting nice pictures of themselves and friends and families commenting they look lovely. It's a form of looking for validation, and nothing wrong with it if not over done. We all need boosting sometimes.

@tootesuite

Totally agree Brefugee. Physical beauty is fleeting, enjoy it, I say!

The justification for why average Colin got together with beautiful American women upthread is laughable.

But why can't Colin get together with someone prettier ? Would you say that about a woman

But why can't Colin get together with someone prettier ? Would you say that about a woman confused

Picked up by 3 beautiful women who invite him to share their bed? Pull the other one!

@tootesuite

But why can't Colin get together with someone prettier ? Would you say that about a woman confused

Picked up by 3 beautiful women who invite him to share their bed? Pull the other one!

Yeah , it is a daft storyline. And reversed i would be ...weird.

But the inference was that an 'average' looking man can't pull a girl as pretty as that and I think that's sad.

@tootesuite

Really?! My SM is full of people posting nice pictures of themselves and friends and families commenting they look lovely. It's a form of looking for validation, and nothing wrong with it if not over done. We all need boosting sometimes.

A PP nailed it earlier - the British way is to put yourself down and be picked up.

Keira didn't say, 'I look quite pretty, don't I?'. She just said 'I look quite pretty', like she was really surprised and pleased. She was talking out loud rather than speaking directly to Andrew...she believed Andrew disliked her at this point. At no time did she ask for his validation.