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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

teacher hitting child on head with thin soft cover book

60 replies

supersonicsuperstar · 17/12/2020 16:23

Child is 9, was reading when they should not have been in the classroom, told to take the book (which has a soft cover, like a small version of tintin, say) to the shelf, child obeyed but read while wandering over there, teacher lost her shit, walked up to him, grabbed the book, wacked child over the head twice and then told him to sit down. This is not in the UK, teachers hitting children is against the law though does sometimes happen, but not at this school. I am having difficulty processing it. Otherwise a really great school, nice teacher, rarely shouts let alone hits... there has been a lot of aggression in the playground the last few days too, which is unusual.

OP posts:
ClaireP20 · 17/12/2020 16:25

Are you sure it was done in anger? Could it be done in a jokey way?

supersonicsuperstar · 17/12/2020 16:28

According to my young witness it was anger, but I am not completely certain. I asked the thing.

OP posts:
Whatisthisfuckery · 17/12/2020 16:36

This is a very serene classroom story in which a teacher loses their shit. Lol, no OP, your child is embellishing somewhat. Tell them to stop being silly, oh, and in future if the teacher asks them to do something, then do it.

supersonicsuperstar · 17/12/2020 17:34

@whatisthisfuckery terrible advice, sorry. A child gets hit (or "tapped") on the head with a book, the response is not "don't be silly, oh, and in future if the teacher asks you to do something, then do it"". Unless you don't believe they were hit or tapped on the head?!
"loses their shit" is my paraphrasing, their words were "she got annoyed".

I am not really sure what to make of it yet.

OP posts:
GammyLeg · 17/12/2020 17:37

No. Not okay! I would be taking this further.

MissBaskinIfYoureNasty · 17/12/2020 17:37

I would want to know the teachers side of the story...

KarenMarlow3 · 17/12/2020 17:38

No, not terrible advice. The child wasn't doing as he/she was told and received what was no more than a reprimand. I doubt being hit with a soft cover book would do any harm.

Ingridla · 17/12/2020 17:41

I would think nothing of it at all, a soft cover book, a tap on the head, its hardly 6 of the best is it Hmm

GammyLeg · 17/12/2020 17:41

It’s not about doing harm though. You can say the same about smacking a child on the bum. Hitting a child on the head with a book is unacceptable.

YesMeLady · 17/12/2020 17:42

So they didnt get whacked over the head and the teacher didnt lose their shit. Maybe speak to the teacher for their version. Who is involved in the playground aggression.

2magpies1pigeon · 17/12/2020 17:43

I would let this go.

KarenMarlow3 · 17/12/2020 17:43

What about, 'a child disobeying the teacher' being unacceptable?

BroadBeanSlippers · 17/12/2020 17:45

I’m a teacher and this is not acceptable.

In fact where I live teachers have been censured and in some cases lost their licences for incidences not unlike this.

Mylittleturkeysandwich · 17/12/2020 17:45

I would want to speak to them about it. I personally don't find it acceptable at all. Agree that you'd need the whole story though but on the face of it, no, not ok.

IMNOTSHOUTING · 17/12/2020 17:48

A child disobeying a teacher isn't ideal but is something you expect to happen every day in schools. A teacher losing their rag and hitting a child with a book is totally unacceptable and something I wouldn't expect to ever happen in a school.

It's not a case of whether the child was physically hurt (I'm sure they weren't). The child should feel safe in school and that the adults in charge are in control of themselves and won't lash out.

Mycircusmymonkey · 17/12/2020 17:48

Well see this is the problem. An event happens, child retells it with possible slight embellishments and then you retell it adding your own embellishments “loses her shit” “whacks over the the head”.
So how are we to know if it was a tut and a light swat or full blown rage and hitting?
Saying they lost their shit isn’t paraphrasing the teacher got annoyed. If you can’t retell a story without exaggerating then how can you know the child is saying what actually happened.

reginaphalangeeee · 17/12/2020 17:52

Good luck with this thread, teachers can do no wrong on MN.

I wouldn’t be happy if this was my child though. I also wouldn’t be telling my child “not to be silly” without knowing the full story.

Maireas · 17/12/2020 17:55

What country is this?

Divebar · 17/12/2020 18:00

I think teachers would beg to differ about “ doing no wrong on MN). They came in for a huge amount of flack over the summer ( NB I
Am not a teacher). I can’t make a decision because the OP has ramped it up as already stated. I’m also concerned about how the information was obtained and what kinds of questions were used to get the info. Are there any injuries? Is the kid ok? All of these are questions I’d like to know but I’m leaning towards “ next time do as you’re told” - maybe I’d feel different if it was my kid involved.

ImPrincessAurora · 17/12/2020 18:02

@MissBaskinIfYoureNasty

I would want to know the teachers side of the story...
Same
Maireas · 17/12/2020 18:04

teachers can do no wrong on MN
😂 😂 😂 😂

supersonicsuperstar · 17/12/2020 18:04

Saying she lost her shit is not an embellishment it was an assumption because people hit each other when they lose their rag, flip their lid, lose their shit, whatever you want to call it. This teacher might have done it as an affectionate very soft tap but on balance I think that is unlikely as it isn't like her, and I would say it is more likely she lost their temper. If it was a one off and I think it probably was, I think I would let it go. But I am not sure what happened and I haven't spoken to her yet.

As for "whacked" the child wasn't hurt but they said they had a headache for a short while afterwards and they had tears in their eyes when they told me about it.

Someone asked about aggression in the playground - if you are asking if the same child is involved, no, but I think the teachers are feeling under pressure about it.

What bothers me is that this is my dc and the reading thing is incredibly annoying and I have been known to yell at them to stop reading and hurry up and to take the book from them. But the idea of hitting them on the head has not come into my head. Just seems like a bizarre thing to do in this day and age in a classroom.

OP posts:
IMNOTSHOUTING · 17/12/2020 18:04

To be clear I was just arguing that as told what happened is absolutely unacceptable even if the child was being cheeky. If one of my DC came home with this story I would absolutely not assume it happened exactly as they described though. (Even without lying their interpretation might be skewed).

Iwonder08 · 17/12/2020 18:05

People glorify teachers here, if my child got hit in whatever manner on their head I would get it officially investigated

zaphodbeeble · 17/12/2020 18:06

So the teacher didn’t lose their shit and didn’t whack your child.
You’re just making assumptions?

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