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AIBU?

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Original poster

Please reply if you had a child over the age of 41, never had children before that or are trying to conceive over the age of 41 & started your periods at 11 or earlier

60 replies

NightBlue · 16/12/2020 20:44

Posting here for traffic as no responses on conception board.

Just as the title reads
and please can you state your ethnicity?

I want to do a crude analysis of how many women have conceived their first child after the age of 41 if they started their periods before 11.

I want to see if there is a difference in ethnicities as well.

I want to give myself some hope of trying to conceive my own child under these conditions.

Please do not respond with suggestions of adoption or donor eggs.

Thanks

OP posts:
GrandTheftWalrus · 17/12/2020 01:17

@NightBlue

Hi Sunbird, it helps because you are at least one person who has got pregnant with her own eggs despite starting periods at 11 or earlier. I read something worrying today that 25 years after the start of periods you can't have your own biological children. I wanted to hear from at least a handful of people that met the criteria.
I started my periods at 10. I'm now 36 and pregnant with my 2nd. I'm white.

I know I'm not in your demographic but with my first I'd had periods for 21 years and 26 years.

Sunbird24 · 17/12/2020 01:43

@NightBlue

Hi Sunbird, it helps because you are at least one person who has got pregnant with her own eggs despite starting periods at 11 or earlier. I read something worrying today that 25 years after the start of periods you can't have your own biological children. I wanted to hear from at least a handful of people that met the criteria.
That makes sense, thank you for explaining. I did get get pregnant from my first transfer but had a missed miscarriage, hence being due to have another transfer in the next couple of months. I’ve got 7 frozen fertilised embryos still to try so hopefully one of them will stick. I’m white British, for your demographic comparison
whatnow41 · 17/12/2020 02:03

I started my period at 8. Had a host of gyne issues but nothing that should have stopped me getting pregnant, so was diagnosed with unknown fertility issues. IVF at 32 with my own eggs was successful. So that's 24 yrs after is started my period. White British.

Hippymama · 17/12/2020 09:28

I started my periods aged 13. Had my last baby aged 42 and fell pregnant naturally. We weren't trying, so she was a complete (and very lovely) surprise. I'm white British.

pinbinpin · 17/12/2020 09:39

25 years must just be an average though and there will be a bell curve either side. I wouldn't read too much into that figure. I had my last child exactly 25 years after starting my periods at 13, conceived very easily (assisted with first).

That child is now 10 and I am only just starting to experience menopause symptoms now.

I know lots of women that had babies in their forties, natural conceptions, IVF and accident and at least 3 that had babies at 45, 46 and 47. I very much doubt they started their periods at 22, 21, 20.

Original poster
NightBlue · 17/12/2020 09:40

They're still Sunbird's own eggs, I did ask people not to comment on donor egg stories.
IVF I don't mind, it's about people's own eggs.

OP posts:
Original poster
NightBlue · 17/12/2020 09:41

I meant Petra not Sunbird

OP posts:
Original poster
NightBlue · 17/12/2020 09:46

Will be going to The Evewell clinic soon for Fertility MOT

OP posts:
TreadLightly3 · 17/12/2020 09:54

Good luck OP, I hope you get good news

Hayeahnobut · 17/12/2020 09:59

I read something worrying today that 25 years after the start of periods you can't have your own biological children.

This is nonsense, where did you read it please?

Sunbird24 · 17/12/2020 10:06

Good luck @NightBlue, once you know what your results are you’ll have a much better idea of the possibilities available.
My clinic would always suggest donor eggs to women 43+ I think, which is why I was so keen to get my IVF in this year.

PetraRabbit · 17/12/2020 13:30

Just to add, there's some evidence that older women get pregnant more easily naturally than through IVF- body selecting best egg rather than artificially trying to mature older eggs. I know a couple of early 40s childless women who failed at 'panic' IVF and went on to conceive naturally a few months later.

Poltsova · 17/12/2020 13:37

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

Japa · 17/12/2020 14:59

Yes, I also fit into your category. Started periods at 11 and have had two children after age 41.

JobRetentionScheme · 17/12/2020 15:22

White British
Fell pregnant at 41 1st time unprotected sex - unplanned
Periods at 11 possibly 12 can’t remember but definitely not older
Best thing that happened to me !

Good luck x

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 17/12/2020 15:25

I read something worrying today that 25 years after the start of periods you can't have your own biological children

I started my periods at 13 and got pregnant at 41, so still well over 25 years after I started menstruating.

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 17/12/2020 15:26

I'm white Jewish (not strictly an ethicity but we do have some common biological/genetic traits as a people)

GingersHaveSoulsToo · 17/12/2020 15:32

I started just before 11 and had my first child at 38 unaided. White ethnicity. Tried for 3 years before conceiving but nothing found wrong with me before i got pregnant.

I think the 25 thing is wrong but it might make it a bit more difficult, doesn't mean it won't happen!

HemlockStarglimmer · 17/12/2020 15:58

I got pregnant 27 years after my periods started. It took a year of trying though.
White British.

PaperMonster · 17/12/2020 16:26

I was 11when I first had my periods and had my only child aged 42. White British (now 51 and still not menopausal!)

PicaK · 17/12/2020 17:22

The thing is that for you it's binary. You either will have a baby or you won't. Whatever the statistical odds are etc - that's what it boils down to.
It's a really stressful time and if I'd suggest anything I'd say make sure you have a counsellor you can talk to and work through emotions with. Flowers

IsurvivedbutdidI · 17/12/2020 18:12

It's not about number of eggs. I have heaps at age 41 apparently but it's about the quality.

pktechgirl · 17/12/2020 18:32

Started my period 2 months before my 11th birthday
Some miscarriages and a myomectomy later I gave birth at 44

I am Sri Lankan

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 20/12/2020 08:34

I have a couple of friends from Eastern Europe countries where older married women are less likely to use contraception and it is quite common to see women well into their mid to late 40s and beyond having babies. I don't think there can be a 25 year from menarche cut off. I really sympathise though, OP, there is a lot of scary info out there for older women trying to have a baby and I came across a lot of it myself.

CecilyP · 20/12/2020 08:50

I read something worrying today that 25 years after the start of periods you can't have your own biological children. I wanted to hear from at least a handful of people that met the criteria.

Surely what you read is nonsense. The majority of girls will have started their periods at age 13 and it is far from unusual to have a baby at 38!

Not myself, and slightly outside your very strict parameters, but mum started her periods at 13 and conceived me, her first child, 41. (European)