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AIBU?

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Original poster

to ask if you and/or people you know would have stopped?

149 replies

Lesserspottedmama · 15/12/2020 19:25

My friend was telling me earlier about something that happened to her a few years ago.. she went for a run on a country back road and twisted her ankle.. she was limping along in agony a long way from home and trying to flag down a car. She said 4(!) cars passed her by.. it was the sort of road you had to go really slowly down so it’s not like they could whizz past her. They had to drive past her at 5-10mph ignoring her. She said they were all men aged between 40-60. A 5th car stopped and it was a young man who couldn’t have been much older than 19. He was very kind and dropped her home which was a 5 min drive away.

Would you have stopped if you saw a female runner in running gear limping and trying to flag you down? No judgement, just curious.
I would have, so would my husband, my parents and brother. I believe many of my friends would. I was surprised to hear so many cars passed by without stopping. She said it was about 8am so perhaps they didn’t want to be late for work. I would’ve stopped regardless. I understand some have had past experiences which would make them more reluctant though.

OP posts:
BigFatLiar · 15/12/2020 21:14

Nope, neither of us would.

tigger1001 · 15/12/2020 21:14

No I wouldn't stop and equally if I was the injured runner, Limping along, I wouldn't be wanting a stranger to stop either. Certainly wouldn't let a stranger in my car nor would I get into a strangers car.

It's why I always carry a mobile with me.

Butchyrestingface · 15/12/2020 21:17

I went flying a few weeks ago, and landed hard on the pavement. Right beside very busy road. Broad daylight. Zero of the cars that pooled past stopped. It took me several minutes to get up as I'd sprained my ankle and was bleeding from the other leg. Limped rather dramatically home.

Only person who expressed concern was a fellow pedestrian further up the road who saw me fall and waited for me to limp up to the point where we both turned into our street. She expressed her disapprobation of the "aw the fanny drivers" who didn't stop in rather strong terms. Grin

Just as well I hadn't landed face down in a puddle otherwise it might have been good night, Vienna. Xmas Confused

WhyNotMeThough · 15/12/2020 21:21

I would stop. Also I don't always carry a mobile with me these days if I'm out walking or cycling.

Milkshake7489 · 15/12/2020 21:25

Not on a country road and definitely not if I was alone.

What I would do however is stop a reasonable distance away and call the police to check it out.

thegrassisgreenwhereyouwaterit · 15/12/2020 21:28

I always stop if I see something like this. My husband says he’ll always stop to help a woman broken down for eg. because he’d want someone to stop and help me in the same circs.

400rabbits · 15/12/2020 21:29

I would stop and offer to call for help but the doors would be locked and I would only open the window a crack. On my own at night I would just be too worried about a scam or worse- when I was younger relying on a seemingly nice person ended with me being in a very nasty situation so...

This actually reminds me that when I was a student my ex and I would hitchhike after missing the last train or bus home. We would sometimes get picked up by a single woman and in retrospect I just think no god don't do that. Nasty people around unfortunately who are happy to take advantage of kind people

Givemeabreak88 · 15/12/2020 21:29

No way, I would not stop.

Reminds me of the time I was out late at night and a woman stopped her car and asked me if I wanted a lift, I found it very odd but I’m in London and it’s not the norm, I declined!

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 15/12/2020 21:31

I can understand men not stopping. They’ll have heard stories of just this kind of thing turning out to be a pretence that turns nasty.,

As a woman I might well stop for another woman, though.

Milkshake54 · 15/12/2020 21:34

A while ago my DH was walking to Tesco and I was meeting him in the car. A girl in her late teens / early 20’s stopped him and asked for directions to the train station - we had been to Tesco, collected our shopping and was on our way back home, when we saw the girl (had maybe made 5-10mins further on). Station was about another 30mins walk at least!

We stopped and offered her a lift. She was very grateful - however i said to my DH if you are on your own, don’t ever do that, as you open yourself up to potential allegations.

It’s so sad that this is the world we live in, where we are worried about something that could happen!

Thecurtainsofdestiny · 15/12/2020 21:36

I'm not sure. I know my son has, as a young adult. But the woman started behaving very inappropriately with him. İ think he did put himself at risk of false accusation.

İ have stopped the car to help people who were very obviously injured and in need of medical help though.

SarahAndQuack · 15/12/2020 21:39

@tigger1001

No I wouldn't stop and equally if I was the injured runner, Limping along, I wouldn't be wanting a stranger to stop either. Certainly wouldn't let a stranger in my car nor would I get into a strangers car.

It's why I always carry a mobile with me.

But have you never found yourself out of reception? Confused
peboh · 15/12/2020 21:41

No I wouldn't, however I would pull up not far away and call for some assistance for them.
Not only could you be putting yourself at risk of a scam, you could also be putting yourself at risk of danger or any kind of accusation.

CupoTeap · 15/12/2020 21:45

Yes and have done for other things, car accidents, dog in the road, Someone collapsed in the floor type stuff. So would my dp.

GlitterandBalloons · 15/12/2020 21:48

Id feel vulnerable, especially if it was a quiet road. I would possibly stop but my doors would remain locked and I would just roll the window a bit, she wouldnt be allowed in my car but I would offer to call someone for her. A female would still make me feel vulnerable due to risk of scams or distraction for a group to appear.

MynephewR · 15/12/2020 21:49

No I wouldn't stop for anyone unless a young child. And I would never try to flag a lift either. I'd never go anywhere rural without my phone, and even if I did and then hurt myself I'd honestly rather limp home in pain than get into a strangers car. Both are waaay too risky.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 15/12/2020 21:52

I once stopped and gave a runner a lift through a puddle - more of a flood, actually - it was too deep for her to run through, and too long to jump over. I found her hesitating at the shallow end, so I drove her 10 metres, to keep her feet dry.

I’ve also stopped and picked up an elderly gentleman who was walking with obvious difficulty along a country road - nowhere near any shops or houses. It turned out he was going to the dentist - it was on,y 10 minutes drive away, but I don’t think he’d have made it to the nearest bus stop, let alone all the way to the dentist, so I drove him to the door.

So,yes, I would pick up an obviously injured runner.

TableFlowerss · 15/12/2020 21:53

@Royalbloo

Or some sort of scam where someone pretends they need help and get jumped - people just won't pick anyone up these days.
This would be my concern to to be honest.

I don’t know if I would have stopped tbh. Since having my DC’s I’m much more wary about putting myself in situations that could be harmful.

Pre-kids I was much carefree and would take more risks, but I think differently these days.

At that point you don’t know if it’s genuine or not. So you make the call on that particular situation.

Now you say she lived 5 minute drive so anyone that knows the road would probably think she’s ok, she can walk and she’ll get to done houses very soon. It’s not life/death and she’s not in the middle of nowhere miles for civilisation.

TicTacTwo · 15/12/2020 21:54

@Royalbloo

Or some sort of scam where someone pretends they need help and get jumped - people just won't pick anyone up these days.
^^ This
christmasathomeagain · 15/12/2020 21:57

@Royalbloo

Or some sort of scam where someone pretends they need help and get jumped - people just won't pick anyone up these days.
This would be my thought if I'm honest. I would like to think I would help but like pp said, you have all these thoughts and before you know it you have gone past.
bananaboats · 15/12/2020 21:57

I wouldn't stop or get in a stranger's car if I was the injured person for all the same reasons as above!

TableFlowerss · 15/12/2020 21:58

@ItStartedWithAKiss241

This is why those scam Facebook stories about “my grandad pulled over and the young lady was actually a wolf and ate him” are so harmful, people in real help don’t get it as we are all so scared of each other. X
That made me laugh more than it should. Actually giggling out loud now 😂
Plussizejumpsuit · 15/12/2020 22:00

Scaremongering about scams like this are way more common than any actual scams

muddledmidget · 15/12/2020 22:05

I would stop, whether by myself or with DH, but I'm always inclined to think the best of people and so far, it's always worked out OK for me. I do pick up hitchhikers in our fairly rural area where buses are frequently cancelled. The last guy I picked up had been waiting for a bus since 9am, and had to be at the job centre by 12, 8 miles from where I picked him up at 11.30, otherwise his benefits got sanctioned. He made the appt and didn't murder me so I class that as a win. Have also picked up a man walking 10 miles home in thick snow after buses had been cancelled. He'd been thumbing for a lift for a couple of miles but no one stopped. Can't work out if I'm stupid or everybody is too untrusting

Nowaynl · 15/12/2020 22:11

No, I wouldn’t personally stop because I think I watch way too many crime dramas and I’d be too worried they were either trying to scam me or murder me.

I remember it snowing one night really heavily and I was fast asleep in bed, it was about 2am. Someone started banging on my front door, I jumped out of my skin and peered out of the curtain. A couple had got their car stuck in the snow outside and I think they thought I was up because I always kept my hallway light on (young DC). There’s no way I’d have opened the door!