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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how much you spend on your children for Christmas?

427 replies

chubbycheeks26 · 14/12/2020 00:24

I imagine this has been done to death.

I am sick and tired of my mum telling me that I've spent too much on my 2 year old daughter, around £600. However, she's my only one and if she had siblings my budget would still be the same, just between them. I can afford it, so AIBU to spend this kind of money? Or am I being ridiculous?

OP posts:
dairyfairies · 14/12/2020 02:50

£60-70 per child (10 and 14).

£600 for a 2 year old is crazy IMO.

HollyCarrot · 14/12/2020 03:04

Between clothes and presents about 350 euro. Which is loads imo.

HollyCarrot · 14/12/2020 03:16

@HollyCarrot

Between clothes and presents about 350 euro. Which is loads imo.
And just thinking about it, forget about spending and remember the experiences. Do the food for Santa etc. That's what they remember x
ChaBishkoot · 14/12/2020 03:26

About 100-120 each. They are 4 and 9.
Some board games and books. A couple of science kits for DS1. Some art and craft stuff for DS2. (This includes gifts from me, DSis and my BIL so ours is about 60-70 for each of that total).
They have enough and I have never spent more than this on any year. Both DH and I are high earners so they are relatively spoilt- we do buy stuff during the year.
I spend a LOT of time thinking about what to get because as they are getting older I want to make sure it’s something that is not a fad. And will end up at the back of a toy box.

StillDumDeDumming · 14/12/2020 03:29

I’m actually feeling guilty about ds (19) - which is crazy as he doesn’t care at all. For his birthday he got a rail card (which got no use this year) and a prepayment prescription certificate. He gets very little throughout the year. He wants money so I’m giving him £70 - that’s the budget. I’ve got him a t shirt and hot chocolate and then wrapped up his favourite childhood action figures that I recently came across in the cellar.

I’ve stuck to the £70 for my daughter - plus around £15 stocking. But she gets loads in the year as she’s more into stuff - as you can tell ds doesn’t care about things at all and sees it as a massive burden!

JaggersCat · 14/12/2020 03:46

That’s a lot to spend.
I’d probably by some cheap crap and stick the rest in a savings account. But your money love. Do what you want x

August20 · 14/12/2020 04:02

Your money, your child, your choice.

But I would gently suggest putting some aside and investing it for her instead. If you spent £300 and invested £300 then after fifteen years at an estimate 5% pa return you could give her £7000 at Christmas to start her adult life with. £300 is certainly enough for a good haul each year. And the £7000 would be amazing gift to go towards uni life or a gap year or just starting out. I just suggest that as my aunty did it for her daughter and it funded a gap year abroad - more memorable than more toys.

MamaPip · 14/12/2020 04:34

I went a bit mad for our girls 1st Christmas she was about 17 months well it was a disaster I had a Peppa pig Airwalker balloon in with all the toys scared her silly 😂 wouldn’t go into the room or downstairs without screaming for the day !! Second Christmas was expensive too but not so much things a wooden kitchen and wooden food was about €300 alone then books etc it adds up quick .

This year we have all the big toys now so I’ve spent about €300 between my 3 and 11 month old but most of that is on a joint present of a learning cube and books . Have tried stay away from plastic toys or small bits as they always end up going missing in our house drives me mad !

Crustmasiscoming · 14/12/2020 04:40

I don't think there is a "correct" amount. It entirely depends on the family. I think saying that £600 is too much to spend makes as much sense as saying that £20 isn't enough. It's arbitrary. And I'm sure if you said you'd only spent £20 as it was all you could afford and your mother said it wasn't enough, there'd be a queue of posters saying that your mother was being really nasty and snobby.

If it's in budget and you think it's appropriate then it's fine to spend that. If you're worried about her being spoilt then spend less. You are the parent so it's your decision.

Most importantly - do not change the amount that you spend purely because your mother has told you that it's wrong. It's none of her business. Stop telling her how much you spend on stuff.

SuperCaliFragalistic · 14/12/2020 04:53

I think that's a lot on a toddler who will be bored of Peppa in 6 months time but it's your money to spend. I've bought my 5 year old a bike for £200 as he rides his bike every day and needs a bigger one but after xmas I'll sell his old one for £100. He's got a few other toys and books. My 9 year old has a main present costing £80 which will last her years (sewing machine) plus some extra bits including books and art stuff.

Disappointedkoala · 14/12/2020 05:09

There's no right answers, it depends what you can afford. That would personally be too much for me though. I thought we were a bit nuts spending £100 on our 2yo last year because we brought her a scooter but DH was very insistent on which one he wanted to buy. We've spent about £60 this year. I try to use charity shops where I can, especially for books, and my preference is always for toys that will last for years but don't take up much space!

Littlepond · 14/12/2020 05:21

Ooh we’ve spent a lot this year - we had a finance rearrange and had the money spare so wanted to treat the kids after a crappy year. They are older though, 17, 14 and 12 so it’s easy to spend loads - they’ve all got a new console as main present so that’s £300 plus all the other bits and pieces. I just see it as all the money we saved on not going on holiday, or out with friends, or on school transport etc for the best part of a year!

Usually main presents are £40-£60 though. We do what we can afford. DH get a Christmas bonus of around £700 after tax so we try and make that cover everything. Not this year tho haha!

Thehollyandtheirony · 14/12/2020 05:55

I think it’s a lot to spend but it doesn’t matter if you can afford it and they are all considered purchases rather than crap with a very short life span.
I highly recommend getting a slide for the Pikler. We got the pikler for Christmas and added the slide at the next birthday. It gets used every day.
I haven’t added up what I’ve spend this year. We are lucky not to have a budget, I just buy what I think they’ll like. It’s nowhere near £600 each but probably something like that for both children together.

Tsubasa1 · 14/12/2020 05:58

Ours added up to £60 pounds each. It really doesn't make Christmas any less fun to spend less money. As PP have said, the important things in our house are the experiences eg. Christmas meal, games, leaving food out for Santa.

Simplyunacceptable · 14/12/2020 06:03

My older DC ask for expensive gifts now so last year it was a tablet each for the girls and a switch for DS, this year it’s a laptop for DS and camera each for the girls. They do naturally start costing more as they get older anyway, their clothes and shoes become more expensive for starters.

At a guess I’d say I spent maybe £250 on my 2 year old. It’s his birthday in late October so he got a fair amount then and he just has so many toys, it gets a little out of hand really.

It ultimately doesn’t really matter though. You spend whatever you can afford and stop worrying about it! Don’t tell your mother in future.

christmasathomeagain · 14/12/2020 06:08

That is a lot for a two year old but its your money. Mine are 11 and 13 and have probably had £350 each. Not sure as lost track.

ShortcakeDelivery101 · 14/12/2020 06:12

I think I've spent about £500 each on my 3 year old and 4 year old...

I don't even feel like it's spoiling them, it doesn't even look much... They've got a book, a dress up costume, a board game, cars, jigsaws etc each as their wrap ups and then 3 "big" presents each which is their main list (which includes things like a talking Rex from Toy Story and a telescope) Not even expensive presents really, just a lot of things that add up...

I spend what I have to personally to make sure they get what they've asked for and it's special for them... but I do also get the "you've spent way too much comments" from a lot of people 🤷🏻‍♀️ I don't really care tbh 😂 I'd gladly save up and spend 4 times that if it made it magical for them...

Ivalueloyaltyaboveallelse · 14/12/2020 06:21

OP just don’t tell people. It’s your money and only your business. We spend a lot on ours and people would be disgusted but I do not care as it’s our money.

DipSwimSwoosh · 14/12/2020 06:28

Around £100 each.

Oysterbabe · 14/12/2020 06:29

Spend what you want, it's no one else's business. I've spent more on DD than I usually would as she's getting a £300 bike and some smaller things. As long as you aren't buying tat for the sake of it I don't see the issue.

Eileen101 · 14/12/2020 06:44

Just don't give your mum the details of what you spend!

My first reaction was that £600 is a crazy amount to spend on a two year old. But now you've said a pikkler triangle and Grimm's toys as well as the Peppa pig toys, I can see how it's totted up easily. I'm not familiar with the Peppa toys but can imagine that they're pricey.

I could have so easily spent a fortune on Grimm's toys.

In the end, we spent about £60 between the two of them (2.5 and 6mos). Neither has any understanding of Christmas and DHs job is a bit precarious and I'm on mat leave so we'd much rather put the money away for the expensive years when they're older.

I'm sure it will make me look cheap, as DCs cousins get A LOT, but the two playsets we've brought, DS will LOVE as he's very much a 'sit and play' child rather than energetic and rambunctious. Also, I spend on the DC through the year - I've just brought a load of clothes in the next size up as he's growing at a rate of knots and I've spent a good bit on books because we do a lot of reading. I recently also brought a largeish playset second hand recently, which ILs pointed out I could have put away for Christmas. Well, yes, I could have done, but to a toddler DS, it's an arbitrary day. Since we gave it to him, he's played with it every day and had far more use out of it than if it had been taking up my wardrobe space for the last 3 months Grin

frustrationcentral · 14/12/2020 06:58

Both of our sons birthdays are just weeks before Christmas, we put away 1k at the beginning of the year - usually from DH's bonus. This 1k is for birthdays, towards a party and Christmas , so roughly they get £200 in presents for each event and £100 towards a party. We might add a bit more money in to get what they want, but not loads. For instance DS1 has asked for an Xbox this year which is £250. We can easily afford the extra £50, so why not.

I think it feels like they get loads as we spend 6 weeks feeling like we're inundated with presents. Maybe if their birthdays weren't close to Christmas then we'd feel stingy and stretch a bit more!

Gooseysgirl · 14/12/2020 07:07

Honestly it's entirely up to you what you spend, and no one else's business! We tend to do the more expensive gifts from us, rather than Santa eg this year we're getting a Nintendo Switch as a family present. My Santa budget is usually around £100 ish per child. I had to google Pikler Triangle but it looks like a very robust toy and one that will bring great enjoyment to a toddler 😊

Bella37 · 14/12/2020 07:09

I have 2 dc (12 and 15) I spend £100 on each plus £30 on each stocking, but if I had more money coming in I would definitely more, however dc don’t seem to mind.

YetAnotherChicken · 14/12/2020 07:10

I spent:

Around £300 on DD (23) and her partner combined
Around £400 on DS (16)
Around £150 on DS (2)

Personally I can't imagine spending that amount on a toddler. I'd rather save it until they are teens/preteens as that's when it gets really pricey!