would this be a shit Christmas dinner?

[Lullabyebye]

DP and I are hosting this year - first time ever. It’s my parents, his parents and his brother. My mum is a retired chef (a very good one) but with age and arthritis, she gets super stressed with Xmas and so we are completely taking over.

As a family we hate Turkey so usually have beef. We have preordered fore rib and a gammon joint. We will have all the normal trimmings. We like Yorkshire puddings and MIL has demanded them (I know there’s some strong opinions on this!) so I bought nice ones that I’ve put in the freezer.

My plan is to just not stress. It should be a nice meal but it’s just a fancy roast eh?
So for starters, my mum was going to make coquille st Jacque. But I tried some frozen ones from Aldi and they were delicious. No one else (in laws) needs know... that would be starters.

Dessert - we asked MIL to contribute and she said she’d make Sticky Toffee Pud, we have also got some Christmas puddings.

We are cooking everyone a big fry up first. We have some smoked salmon which I will probably do vol au vent style with cream cheese as a snack.

Is this lazy? I just don’t see the point in not enjoying the day because we are stressed. I’m usually quite efficient in the kitchen and I’ve smashed out a few roasts, but I’m not a regular cook.

Opinions?

YABU - just bloody cook it properly
YANBU - it’s not just about the food and it sounds fine

I'm baffled by this thread

Me too. There's nothing wrong with having a couple of things ready made and your guest providing dessert.

But honestly, so much food. There's no way I could enjoy a Christmas dinner after a fry up at 11 and smoked salmon and cream cheese vol au vents as a snack.

They have a cheek expecting breakfast at that time anyway. Coffee fine, but preferably do as suggested here and tell them to arrive later.

Coffee/croissants for breakfast, 9-ish
Champagne. Gravlax with mustard sauce and soda bread about 1 pm. (All made in advance) . More Champagne.
Roast beef , yorkshires, roast potatoes and veg, home-grown horseradish sauce, gravy, about 6-7 pm. Bottle of claret.
Dessert - new favourite, Nigella's basque cheesecake. Beautifully light and fluffy, dead easy to make, and served with a few berries. (NOT the liquorice sauce)
Cheeses, medjool dates, chutney and biscuits.
Gammon for Christmas eve supper and Boxing day sandwiches.

I meant cheesecakes not Christmas pud, MIL asked for Christmas pud but I hate it and I specifically told mum no to making it. She will just fret.

The cheesecakes are preorder from Morrison’s. The starter is frozen. But MIL doesn’t eat shellfish so has agreed to pate, but DP will have halloumi so I think she can too.

We have many a time eaten a fry up and then a roast a few hours later. You’re all making me feel fat

DP’s family are stick thin, can’t gain weight, think a size 10 is overweight but can put it down like no tomorrow. I’ll be honest I’m dreading it.

Told DP no to the gammon now. He’s disappointed. But he also would leave it up to me.

We get home around 11pm Christmas Eve provided no delays. I just want to sleep and drink. But my mum being stressed makes me anxious so if I take over, only I will feel crap but everyone else will hopefully have a nice time.

So:

Fry up - bacon in a pan, sausages in oven, eggs scrambled. The end.

Starters - cook from frozen
Main - mum is going to help with meat, we will do the rest. I’m going to try go to M&S to fill the freezer with veg. Mum seemed appalled by this but it’s MY HOUSE.
Dessert - ready made.

This is feasible right? I plan on being drunk. I know there’ll be a fight with MIL. I am dreading it already.

@Lullabyebye
This is feasible right? I plan on being drunk.

Yes. The second sentence makes the first sentence feasible. 😂

It all sounds lovely. My thought would be that it is really hard to get the roast potatoes and any boiled or steamed veg absolutely right with a roast and that having a starter adds to the complications. I would go for a few canapés with your first glass of something so that you are not all flustered juggling ovens and hot plates.

Absolutely. Especially the drunk part 🤣

Tell us more about MIL - why does DP feel as though he has to win her love? Surely it should be unconditional. Also, why will there be a fight? Is she a complete horror?

Get drunk. Tell MIL exactly what you think of her. Then you'll never have to do Christmas for them ever again. Job done :)

Last year I watched Nigella programme about hosting at Christmas. I’m not too keen on her but the way she pre-prepared the food only to bind it in the oven was to me really a way to go if you’re hosting.

Cold buffet is also a life saver- something for everybody 🙂
Don’t stress out,as long as everybody’s fed enough and happy it should be fine :)

OP, I just read through all your posts.

Christmas is about enjoying yourself and time spend with family,not to fret about anybody’s demands and pleasing unreasonable family members.

Your Christmas is as important as everybody else’s,whether’s its relative on your side or DP.

Buy whatever you can from the shops (even ready desserts) and steer the conversation away from what was cooked from scratch and by whom (ooh,you must try these profiteroles,let me check the oven,will be back in 5 minutes,just nipping out for a minute...)

Wishing you good luck and enjoy 🙂

Surely when she said a "nice breakfast" she meant some pastries and Buck's Fizz?

I'd be mortified if someone presented me with a fry up on Christmas morning at any time but 11am?!

By that time the house should be full of roasting smells. And do the ham! You can do it the night before and slice it, it's fine.

Why will you be having a fight with your DPs mum after he's made her a special cracker?

Sounds really lovely!

That sounds sensible. But buy the crackers or you'll go mad before Christmas Day!

We always had light Christmas breakfast ie croissants,choc du pain, toast. Don’t want to spoil the dinner. Boxing Day cooked breakfast. Cold meats for lunch delicate sandwiches and mince pies for tea. Then choc frenzy. Oh and Christmas Eve curry.

It's not what I'd want to eat but if your guests are all happy with it them go for it.

I agree a fry up is a bit much. We used U.K. have smoked salmon and scrambled eggs on toast before going veggie when it became just scrambled/poached eggs and avocado/mushrooms on nice toast. That was plenty for breakfast.

Cinnamon rolls (from a jus rol tin), croissants or pain au chocolate would be a lovely breakfast.

Christmas is supposed to be about happiness and seeing family etc, so don't stress or feel the need to cook a Michelin star dinner. Cook whatever the hell you like and enjoy your day. We're having beef and Yorkshire puds for ours too

God your in-laws sound so demanding I would never expect to turn up to someone's house on Xmas day and expect a fry up and a whole Xmas dinner that is so cheeky!! Can they not eat breakfast before they come? CF indeed

And if they want lobster they can bloody bring it! God how you've keep your cool with them is outstanding because I couldn't

I voted YABU because of the frozen Yorkshires - they're so incredibly easy to make, being presented with frozen ones would be really disappointing - sorry!

New plan. Tell the inlaws you've been told to self isolate on the 23rd.
Enjoy Christmas.

Honestly, who invites themselves for BREAKFAST?
And if your husband is trying to win his mother's love, why are YOU doing all the sodding work?
No no no no NO!
Tell them to jog on

You know there will be a fight with MIL? Leave her to it. Ignore, ignore and ignore again, with a glass of wine/champagne/whiskey in your hand.

If she really loves Christmas pudding then I would get a small one and microwave that for her. Also give her the other desert, so she can’t make a fuss over that. And as others suggested pastries for breakfast, shop bought. My preference is pastries from Cafe Nero, I buy those on Christmas Eve and reheat them to serve. You buy whatever is your preference.

@ViciousJackdaw

Tell us more about MIL - why does DP feel as though he has to win her love? Surely it should be unconditional. Also, why will there be a fight? Is she a complete horror?

DP is a stately homes boy

@myhobbyisouting

Surely when she said a "nice breakfast" she meant some pastries and Buck's Fizz?

I'd be mortified if someone presented me with a fry up on Christmas morning at any time but 11am?!

By that time the house should be full of roasting smells. And do the ham! You can do it the night before and slice it, it's fine.

Why will you be having a fight with your DPs mum after he's made her a special cracker?

every single time she comes round she expects a cooked breakfast. She went onto say scrambled eggs, hashbrowns...all ok?

We are having frozen giant yorkies, and sausages (giant pig in blanket for adults) plus trimmings. Why not, the kids enjoy it and its easy. Yours sounds quite high effort. And skip fry up