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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To consider if sibling names "match"

153 replies

CassandraBarrett · 08/12/2020 15:03

I commented on a baby name that I had heard to my DH. Not in a negative way, I liked the name.
I said "X's new baby is called Ethan. I like it. The older children are Lucy and Roberta*. I think Roberta doesn't really match the other two" (not real names)

DH said I'm the only person in the world that thinks that way and what does it matter if names match anyway. I disagree. I think a lot of people consider if there children's names match.

Eg Alex, Stephen, Bobby - yes.
Apollo, Chase and Stephen - no

So YABU nobody notices if names match
YANBU people think about it

OP posts:
Whattheactual20201 · 08/12/2020 17:39

My youngest names is already on a thread so I can be outing on that 🤣 her Delilah, my other 2 are among the lines
Of Evie and Oliver ( sort of ) ha

olderthanyouthink · 08/12/2020 17:39

@Plsv87 we have/had two names picked out, both start with the same letter so if the next is a boy we'd have matchy names (different "genres" of names though) but if it's a girl then probably not. Wasn't intentional just the names we could agree on.

JustAnotherUserinParadise · 08/12/2020 17:40

@Dollywilde I knew a family with a "Nicholas" and "Rachel", then 15 years later "Chase"...

SaucyHorse · 08/12/2020 17:51

I went to school with a brother and sister called Mary and Murray. Inexplicable.

I suppose my kids' names have some common features because they were named by the same people and we had the same criteria, though in some ways they're quite different. But I know what you mean, OP. Although childhood is a short bit of your life I did want them to sound like they were from the same family.

spanieleyes · 08/12/2020 17:55

I know a family with a Rowan, Ash and Fred. Just doesn't sound right!

IgiveupallthenamesIwantedareg0 · 08/12/2020 18:37

How about 3 daughters -April, May and "baby" June followed somewhat later by son Julius?

nevernotstruggling · 08/12/2020 19:06

This is really subjective. Phonetically my dds names match quite well but actually one is Arabic diminutive and one is trad French so they don't actually match at all.

SunshineCake · 08/12/2020 19:09

Never considered if my children's names match and think it is a ridiculous concept.

My criteria were - initials cant spell something stupid, not named after anyone relevant, different initials to each other, spelt the correct way.

oblada · 08/12/2020 19:12

I agree with you OP - my kids have all got South Indian name 'made up' by my husband. All have a rather complicated (but v meaningful) names but split into a much simpler (ie it works in English and in French) first name and then the rest as a middle name. I couldn't really have got with 2 Indian names for my girls and then a French name for my boy (though I was tempted as there were French boys names I liked whereas I just couldn't think of a girl name - English or French - that I like, hence why my husband was put in charge).

formerbabe · 08/12/2020 19:15

@oblada

I agree with you OP - my kids have all got South Indian name 'made up' by my husband. All have a rather complicated (but v meaningful) names but split into a much simpler (ie it works in English and in French) first name and then the rest as a middle name. I couldn't really have got with 2 Indian names for my girls and then a French name for my boy (though I was tempted as there were French boys names I liked whereas I just couldn't think of a girl name - English or French - that I like, hence why my husband was put in charge).
I know a family who have one dc with a name that's from their particular culture and two more dc with very traditional British names.
Meepmeeep · 08/12/2020 19:17

If I ever had a second child I wouldn’t give my first child’s name a thought when naming them - matching names is absolutely not a thing for me.

choli · 08/12/2020 19:29

To me it seems quite disrespectful to the younger child to choose a name based on the older siblings' names. Each child should have an independent name.

Squirrel26 · 08/12/2020 19:33

I've come across a few families where the parents seem to have got more and more confident, and closer to the name they ACTUALLY wanted, and then gone 'fuck it, this is the last, let's go for it.' - Think Rose, Iris and Chrysanthemum, or Stella, Skye and Cassiopeia. Grin

Milkshake7489 · 08/12/2020 19:34

I don't think names have to 'match' exactly, but I definitely notice if they are wildly different styles.

I once knew a girl with a very ordinary British name for our age group (think Hailey/Stacey etc.). Her mum was English and her dad was Indian and they gave her sister the most beautiful Indian name...

I always felt really sorry for her because her name sounded so drab in comparison!

It also sounds weird to me if people choose completely different styles of names for their children. Isobel, Emily, and Demi-May just sound odd as a sibling group.

JanewaysBun · 08/12/2020 19:47

I've never really thought of it much before.
My name is incredibly rare and "foreign". My Dsis' is quite 1990s and they both start with the same letter. I'm.the eldest and do feel i got the one with the most thought put into it tbh

My DC are along the lines of valentina and Jon and IDGAF Grin lol

JanewaysBun · 08/12/2020 19:48

And if I have another boy he will be Magnus!

DigOutThoseLemonHandWipes · 08/12/2020 19:56

I know a large family where half have "exotic" names and half very, very plain names e.g. Kevin, Gary and Sarah v Conchita, Marius and Araminta. (All born in the 80's- early 90's. The parents had very different tastes and took turns picking names. It did seem slightly strange but it is really only as small children that names are regularly used as part of a set. I don't know that names of the siblings of most of the people I meet now so it really doesn't matter.

thecatsthecats · 08/12/2020 19:59

@SunshineCake

Never considered if my children's names match and think it is a ridiculous concept.

My criteria were - initials cant spell something stupid, not named after anyone relevant, different initials to each other, spelt the correct way.

I am very particular about syllables for the flow of a name, and I guess I would be for siblings too.

My whole name flows nicely - two, three, two, two. It goes nicely with my siblings forenames - two, three, four and two syllables.

My friend has named her kid something like "Daisy Rosie Poppy Kirby" (fake, but similar I/Y endings). I hate it - sounds so bouncy.

goldenharvest · 08/12/2020 20:32

Agree with your DH. It's absurd to ditch a name you love because it doesn't 'match'. Match what? A child's name?

NoddyWithAVoddy · 08/12/2020 20:35

Never heard anything as silly as matching names.

ShandlersWig · 08/12/2020 20:35

Sonny, Cher and Mark.

I think Mark did well out of it.

Jj2431 · 08/12/2020 20:36

Why do names need to match? Call your child what you're happy with, although all my kids have biblical, old fashioned but also popular names

BashfulClam · 08/12/2020 20:40

Why does it matter , they won’t always be in a group together?

BabyLlamaZen · 08/12/2020 20:41

I think about it a bit, but it wouldn't stop me (the girl and boy names I like are quite different!) Now I would be more concerned about sounding too similar e.g. Arthur and Archer and things like that.

BabyLlamaZen · 08/12/2020 20:43

@choli

To me it seems quite disrespectful to the younger child to choose a name based on the older siblings' names. Each child should have an independent name.
But I think that's the whole point- you want the younger child to feel special and different enough to the first.
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