To ask for your top tips for being a manger?

[Bixs]

I am about to start my first ever managerial position. It will be managing a team of 12 and I have previously worked along side most of them in the same team. I have the experience and the training and I’m confident I can do it but I’m just looking for any tips or advice from people around being a manager for the first time.

I’m excited but also nervous!

Look into some sort of 'buddy to boss' training if available and definitely the mental health first aid for yourself and your team ! Remember the 90/10 rule - you will spend 90% of your time dealing with 10% of the people.

Based on the many bad managers I've had over the years vs the fewer good ones:
Don't have favourites
Have clear expectations
Set the standard - don't expect others to do things you wouldn't do yourself
Conversely, recognise individual skills and find ways for people to shine in those
Be a good listener but don't let yourself become a shoulder to cry on - some people can take advantage
Be human. Have some outside interests (running, bonsai, whatever) that you share at work. Don't be that person who lives for work.
Say good morning and goodnight to everyone you see, by name.

Always listen to your staff and ask them what they think

There is always room for improvement and sometimes it’s something you have overlooked

Keep friendly but not overly friendly

Be careful on night out don’t get ridiculously drunk

And I have found when someone is not doing there job properly or slacking print their job description off and ask them what areas they think they do best in and not so well in offer support training etc

I have found this very helpful (meetings are still quite tense though)

Don't try to be friends with your team, don't try to be liked, develop a very tough skin

Listen to your team and empathise. I don't mean act like you're listening- really do it.

Don't micro manage. Show trust and develop your team as much as you can, because this will make your job a lot easier.

Delegate. Don't do all the work or let them manage you.

Take care of yourself. You need to be in good place, mentally and physically to keep a team working well.

Patience. Managing a team is like being a parent at times - squabbles, bitching, you'll get it all.

Have an open door policy. You should be approachable.

Be clear and firm. Always brief your team clearly and be firm about your expectations/requirements

Treat them with respect. Dont ask them to do something you wouldn't and don't make any of them your coffee bitch lol

Thank you all. Some really good advice.

Some great advice already.

Be their champion. The sign of a good manager is that the people in their team do really well, encourage them to shout about their achievements and shout about them yourself, and don't feel threatened by that as them doing well reflects well on you.

Communicate! I don't think you can over communicate really. Be open, honest, talk to them about what's good and what's not, listen to them and make them feel like they are heard.

I would say remember to hold your responsibility to those you manage as more important than your responsibility to those who manage you. Your team will know if you don't have their back.

I'd also say recruit carefully, value and nurture your staff, and avoid micro managing them.

Create a vertical structure with reporting lines, so you don't have to directly manage 12 people.

Be quick to praise and slow to blame, unless someone is deliberately taking the piss.

@Bixs

These are all such good points. I’ve read everyone and I’m making lots of mental notes.

What does it mean to be “upwardly managed”?

It's when your reports direct your activities (to an extent) or influence your course of action. Also called 'managing your manager'.

@ZoeTurtle

Be quick to praise and slow to blame, unless someone is deliberately taking the piss.

Yes, this!

Also, pass the work but not the stress/politics.

Brilliant thank you. I’m making a mental note of all of these.

A few people have mentioned not trying to be everyone’s best friend. What do you do if some of the team are already really good friends? I can already see several behaviours they show in work that are not ideal and so it’s possible I’m going to have to address these.

Don't make the mistake of thinking that anyone on an hourly wage is going to be as invested as those on salary, and the lower the hourly wage the less they will care. This doesn't mean they won't do the job well, but their motivation is likely to be different to yours.

Something I wished I knew before being a manager:

• Forget about your expertise. You will manage people who are better than you in your core area.

• Start your collaboration with each of them by setting expectations: What do they expect from you, what do you expect from them. The former is often overlooked. By setting expectations, you'll be able to receive informed and meaningful feedback.

• Be vulnerable, don't pretend you know if you don't. Be upfront and transparent with them if you're unsure about something and lean on collaboration to come up with ideas / solutions together.

• Prepare your 1on1, and have them frequently. I always send questions and what I'd like to talk about beforehand so they have time to prepare.

Don't underestimate small talk though. I generally start with a random chat just to get a sense of how they feel, and start the deep talk from a place of ease and openness.

• Don't dismiss any of their concerns. What seems irrelevant to you might not for them. I remember a case when someone in my team asked a question, I didn't have the answer, and I just said "it's just a detail, it's not important anyway" Well, it was important for him.

• They should be your priority. There's no good team, no good company which doesn't prioritise its people.

• Don't expect to get it right straight away. And don't expect that from them either. Make place for mistakes. You learn through mistakes and failures. And admit yours.

• Feedback all the time! Encourage them to give you feedback by asking questions (rather than just "Do you guys have feedback for me?") such as "Is [something] aligned with your expectations? How can I support you? Is there something I can do to give you more clarity?"

Some books I found very insightful:

• Coaching for performance by Sir John Whitmore
• Radical Candor by Kim Scott

If you are friend with people already it can be tricky. It does change the relationship as well. It will be weird for them too though so it goes both ways. Be consistent and fair in your approach - friend or not - then there can be no accusation of favouritism.

Also if it’s a behaviour of one I want to address, I make sure the whole team gets a reminder so when I need to remind and individual I can say “you were all told on X date”

Teach people. All the time. Everything you do, do it in a way that people learn how to do it better than you. The driven ones will try to do more as it keeps them interested in new work, and it will raise the overall standard it work.

Find a mentor, someone to help by talking things through.

It's very very much like parenting. You have to be calm, cheery, consistent, patient, fair. A good tip - when someone brings you a problem. Don't necessarily look at the problem- look at the person, and help them solve it.

Definitely mentoring!

I'll add on to my thoughts. Create a safe place to fail. No one is perfect. Everyone needs to learn and develop. Create an environment where people are confident to try. They may not get the right outcome but don't kill the try.

I actually had a chat with one of my team this week. I don't think I do anything out of the ordinary. But this person was part of a smaller team that eas absorbed into my team. Apparently they didn't work together like they do for me. I didn't know that, until our chat this week.

I say to my team and others that I am so lucky to have such a fabulous group of people working with me. Everyone picks up work, even if it isn't their direct area. It's a larger yeam with 14 people. Everyone gets on. I think other managers will know how rare that is. I've got no problem people, no difficult people. Some were scared to do things outside of their comfort zone initially, but wow, now everyone puts their hand up. As I said, I'm so lucky.

If I were you, I'd look at your not ideal behaviours that you think need addressing. Why do you think that? Do they get their work done on time and to an acceptable standard? I put it back on my people. You're adults and I trust you to know what your role requires and to do what is needed. I'm here and will step in when you need me eg conflicting priorities, difficult clients etc You can rely on me and I can rely on you.

My top tips are:

1 be flexible. If a good team member needs to work from home/take time off at short notice and you can accommodate this, do. The goodwill you engender will be worth it.

1. Be appreciative and give positive feedback and rewards where you can. This will make negative feedback more well received.
2. Be willing to change your mind if a decision isn’t working out. You’ll lose more face by sticking to something which is clearly unpopular and unnecessary than by graciously admitting you made a mistake.
3. If you make a mistake and the occasion warrants it be happy to apologise and make amends.

5 bring HR in early if you think you may need to performance manage someone. Their behind the scenes advice can be very helpful. 6 have their back

1. Don’t micromanage but don’t be so hands off that they feel unsuppprted. That can be a hard balance to find. But see points 3 and 4 above.

Not RTFT but make notes for 121s, with actions and send them. Saves hassle later of things do go wrong. Also people are individuals so ask them how they work best and be prepared to change your style for them. Help and support but beware of taking on their work.

I haven't read all the other comments, but I have been a manager for the last 3 years (yes, new manager here too!) and have some few top tips - or at least they worked for me:

• don't try to be friend with your team, you are their manager and they need you do act like that. Don't overshare, mind what you say as if the same things you were saying only the day before being promoted are now perceived differently.
• don't take things too personally. You will have to deal with A LOT of feedback, complains, negativity at times. It's not about you. Don't ever let it be about you.
• admit your mistakes. You will make mistakes, just don't pretend they are not. Be honest and transparent, get the feedback and show you learned from that.
• clear the path as much as you can for your team. Be the one delivering the message in a way they can understand it, remove the obstacles and make doing the job as easy as possible.
• praise publicly but have words only privately. No one likes to be told off in front of others. But if they are doing well it's nice to be rewarded (just make sure to rotate and don't always say x has done well!)
• get any help you can. I am lucky enough to work for a company that provides lots of training also for managers of all levels. But you can always go to your manager, to HR, to anyone who can offer professional advice.
• find a buddy. I felt very lonely the first year as a manager and I resisted the temptation to think my team members could be my friends. I then started developing relationship with other managers and now I have my 'support network', someone I can moan about my day or specific situations safely!