To ask for your top tips for being a manger?

[Bixs]

I am about to start my first ever managerial position. It will be managing a team of 12 and I have previously worked along side most of them in the same team. I have the experience and the training and I’m confident I can do it but I’m just looking for any tips or advice from people around being a manager for the first time.

I’m excited but also nervous!

These are all really good, thank you.

It’s going to take a lot adjustment. A few people on the team are what I would consider friends. I’ve already been told to prepare for my relationship with team members to changed, is this other’s experience too?

Don’t let the team take the piss, that’s especially a problem when you’ve been promoted and we’re previously “one of them”. So you can be friendly, but ultimately you’re in charge now.

Cross post - yes definitely, it’s hard to maintain a friendship when you’ve been promoted. Also important that the rest of the team don’t think you’re playing favourites. I guess just try and keep the friendships separate from work if you can. So - if it’s a meeting no gossiping about Saturday noght, if you’re out on a Saturday night no chatting about work!

Think about really good managers you’ve had and do what they did. Then think about really shit managers you’ve had and never emulate them. A lot of the advice upthread is excellent.

@LethargicLumpOfLockdownLard

Rock gently. Don't tip the baby out.

No forced fun and merriment, especially on zoom, keep all David Brent-ing to a minimum. Work's bad enough without having to break out the Chandler Bing work laugh 5 times a day just to keep your job.

Never openly advantage yourself in any way by taking from or putting undue burden on your staff. It will be noticed and remembered. Be careful how you speak to those less senior to you, that is noticed not just by juniors, but other seniors.

Give people time to talk to you, for example regurlar 1:1 meetings. One a month seems to work quite well for me but it depends on the people you work with.
Note that everyone is different, some people may need more support than others
And do not sandwich. If you have an issue needing to raise then bring it up clearly, dont smush it between few positives, it can make a confusing situation when people use the sandwich method!

Okay this post by @Ladyface sums up what I was going to write:

Be fair and consistent, have empathy, don’t micromanage

Take nothing personally. IME people expect you to provide solutions for all sorts of stuff, much of it completely out of your control. They will moan about all sorts of stuff. Get support from your own manager and don't try to solve everything. You can't, it's impossible.

A thank you goes such a long way. I feel so valued and appreciated in my current role, in stark contrast to my previous job, and therefore would always go the extra mile as an employee.

And I’d echo the poster who said don’t ask your team to do anything you wouldn’t be willing to do yourself.

Discuss things BEFORE you change them. There may be a very good reason why something is done a certain way that you might not be able to see from your side. Or perhaps you can make something work better? But don't just blindly change things! :)

Start every 1-1 with 'How are you' and 5 mins of life chat.
Remember their success IS your success. Don't try to take credit it for it, take credit for being their manager.
Always have their back

The fact that you've asked means you'll do a great job.

I woodn’t bother, it’s a hay-tful task.

Be first to do the jobs no one wants. You dont have to do them often but the team need to know you're willing.

Likewise taking your turn at making the tea and washing up.

Trust your staff to get on a do a good job until and unless they prove you wrong.

One of my favourite leadership tactics is "wait and see". When faced with a problem, wait and see what the staff do. They usually come up with a solution as good if not better than mine would have been because they're at the coalface and understand the processes better.

Give credit to the team when things go well but step up and take responsibility when they go badly. You can counsel the person who made the mistake privately, but publically, you were in charge so it's your fault.

If you have specific issues there’s a website called ask a manager where people post questions and other managers post how they would deal with it.

Spend time on the balcony and the dancefloor.

Congratulations! The very fact that you’re asking questions and want to learn is a great start. Some really good advice here. I’ve also managed people who were formerly at my same level and my suggestions would be:

• be kind
• find ways to emphasise that you’re there for the good of the wider team, not for your own personal aggrandisement. Even simply saying things about how your role is to create an environment for the team to thrive can go a long way.
• personally I find “open door” approaches a bit problematic because it places the emphasis on people to come to you. I prefer to proactively check in with people - if it gets too much, you’ll soon know, but if people have to come to you all the time then there will be some who will never manage it.
• I’ve learnt so much in my 15-ish years of managing and I look back at things I wish I’d handled differently. If you try something that doesn’t work, own it and acknowledge it
• it can be hugely emotionally draining - people issues can occupy your mind far, far more than other issues. I find it helps to have a trusted colleague to talk things over with, where it’s appropriate to do so.

I was going to say don’t get too close and be a friend but if you are already friends I would advise taking a step back. Don’t get too close and personal try to keep a professional distance and be confidential with everything. If faced with a difficult situation document everything.

Sorry, a couple more!

• always give credit, publicly if possible, and don’t take credit where it isn’t due. I have come across some absolutely egregious examples in my time and it really demoralises a team.
• remember that most people come to work wanting to do a good job.

@britnay

Discuss things BEFORE you change them. There may be a very good reason why something is done a certain way that you might not be able to see from your side. Or perhaps you can make something work better? But don't just blindly change things! :)

I really wish someone had said the above to the last 3 managers i've had. As pp have said the fact you've asked is a good sign. Good luck op.

Read radical candor by Kim Scott. Give feedback - often. Nothing should ever be a surprise in a review.
Be friendly, but keep your distance.
Empower your team but hold them to account.
Maybe take a mental health first aider course and figure out now what your version of self care looks like so you don't take everyones shits home with you. (I ran and do yoga. I couldn't do my job without that break)

I'm MangerMaid, can I help?

If your managing 12 people, conflict should be low.

Consider yourself a team, its not you on top and others below.
Tell people when they have done something well.
Recruit very wisely!
Tell people straight away if they are taking the mick and pull them up on it quickly (when you are reviewing people, nothing should be a surprise).
If someone is doing something wrong or slaking because they always have, nip it in the bud quickly so they know what is expected or it causes massive resentment within the team.
Be consistant in being consistent and have an open door policy.
When people come to you with gossip, dont engage, always be neutral.
Keep paperwork/files/admin upto date and i can not stress this enough, organised!

Good luck in your role.

Id been a manager for a good few years (20+) when DD got her first management role. Like you, she had been promoted from within the team she was managing.

I'm your behalf, I asked her what, if any, advise if given her helped. She said the one that stuck in her mind was never to forget that team members will only ever come to you with problems they cannot sole. That doesn't mean they sent solving many problems themselves everyday, just that most of them won't feel the need to tell you about it.

And to quote Jurgen Klopp when he took over the management of Liverpool FC, and was asked what is style of management was, he said " I'll be every players friend, but not their best friend'

I’ve currently got the best manager I’ve had in my working life (40’s) lots of the above things resonate They are a ‘people person’ which is obvious. He is always calm. They have a good memory for peoples lives. He give cards for birthdays and says thank you for work stuff all the time- costs pennies but makes a good environment . Honestly, in my field there are no pay rises at the moment but it’s ok. I feel valued as an employee.