Husband opening my mail means I've missed the flu jab not I have it

[popsydoodle4444]

Fuming;I've been on my arse this week with flu;my DH hasn't done anything to help;he's currently giving me the cold shoulder,he's not said anything but I know he's peeved off because I've spent every available minute I can sleeping in bed as I need to recover ASAP;3 teenagers have been amazing with helping out,looking after me and their younger brother but it shouldn't be left up to them.

I'm a little worried about Covid 19 so I asked DH (as I don't drive) yesterday if I booked a drive through test today could he please take me but he complained he's too busy with work to take me,he's the company owner and sets his own schedule and can be flexible so he's just being a dick.I've ended up ordering a postal test just in case.

So pretty much I'm being punished for being ill and not being a good little wifey and doing everything (he likes to monitor what I do in the house as he has OCD)

I've just found a big stack of opened mail;in there is an important letter from my sons college about his course and a letter from my GP practice dated the 20th of November telling me I'm eligible for the flu jab;I could have gone to my local pharmacy which is a 5 minute walk away and had it sorted 2 weeks ago but obviously I haven't seen the letter as I didn't open it and my son hasn't seen the letter addressed to him.

I know my DH has opened them,they are dumped in a pile where he leaves his crap along with his mail.I've confronted him about this but he was quite nasty towards me and tried to gaslight me and told I must have opened them and forgotten about it.I've definitely not he's trying to cover up his mistake and knows he's been caught out.

I'm so annoyed because I think this is probably just seasonal flu and if I'd had the jab I wouldn't be ill right now.

So pretty much I'm being punished for being ill and not being a good little wifey and doing everything (he likes to monitor what I do in the house as he has OCD)

This really isn't a symptom of OCD. It is the symptom of a controlling person, though.

WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU STILL WITH THIS PRICK?
I always want to scream this on posts like this. I know it’s hard just to walk away from a marriage but Christ, some people set the standards so bloody low.
L

Why you with a self absorbed P*k like that. He doesn’t deserve you. When he catches the flu do the same and start opening his mail and binning it.
Get out of that stupid marriage, no one else would stand for this.
Teach your kids this is not how you treat a spouse. If you are not going to get out of this marriage for yourself then do it for your kids.

Hope you can leave him one day op; what an arsehole. Feel better soon

This really isn't a symptom of OCD. It is the symptom of a controlling person, though.
This exactly! If he actually had ocd the overwhelming urge to be in control would mean he would do whatever, not boss his little maid about.

Has he even been diagnosed with OCD? I bet he has just self diagnosed so he can use it as an excuse to keep checking up on you to see your worth.

Poor you
What a waste of the one life you have

Why the hell are you even with him? Good God woman have some self respect. I've never even met you and I think you can do better.

His domestic appliance is malfunctioning. He doesn't like that. Why should a domestic appliance have its own private post? Of course he opens its post!

Well you know exactly what to do the next time he gets sick, bastard!

He sounds horrible why are you with him?

I'm so sorry OP, he sounds awful. Hope you feel better soon

"he likes to monitor what I do in the house as he has OCD"

Oh please!

What a load of shit!

He's controlling & uncaring.

Four children, doesn’t drive and is used to be being “good little wifey” - I think it is fairly obvious why the OP is with this horrible man.

Women, don’t give up your financial independence.

First I am sorry that you're feeling poorly and that your husband was so irresponsible about not giving you your mail. At my house whoever gets the mail puts the obvious junk in the recycling then makes piles for each recipient.

Not to sound unsympathetic, but while anything is possible you probably do not have influenza. There is very little circulation of it now because there was hardly any in the southern hemisphere during their winter, so little coming up north now. Masking and social distancing are also very good measures against spreading the flu. And if you had the flu you probably wouldn't have the energy to be going through the mail.

As I said, he was quite negligent to not give you the letter, but we are all responsible for our own health care. It's common knowledge that the flu jab has been available for weeks at least. I got mine at the end of August. He did nothing to stop you from getting it.

Opening mail that is not adressed to you is a crime where I live.

@EKGEMS

I'd strangle the bastard

And take pleasure.

He sounds like a really awful man.

If you've ordered a postal test you all need to isolate til the results come back, your kids will miss school etc.

Do you facilitate his controlling of your cleaning? Do you do that because you don't work full-time? I can't imagine most people who work full time humouring that from a partner. They'd just employ a cleaner and the fussy "OCD" person can knock himself cleaning evenings and weekends if he wants to.
Has this week been a wake up call?

@user1471457751

While he sounds unpleasant, it takes about 2 weeks for the flu jab to be effective. Given you wouldn't have received it until several days after the letter date and you've been ill for a week already, you wouldn't have had the jab in time.

You really think that is the most important issue here ?

(he likes to monitor what I do in the house as he has OCD)

I would put good money on this being more about controlling what you do than a genuine case of OCD. Is he tidy with his own stuff? Does he clear up after himself or expect you to do it? Even if he does have OCD he shouldn't be making you enable that.

My ex sil would say he had OCD, but it was about controlling the smallest details of his wife's life and putting her down. Wouldn't let her load the fridge because she didn't do it the right way, but left his clothes on the floor.

So angry reading this, he sounds like a bloody sociopath - I take it his lack of respect for you extends further to the general public as I can’t see this prick bothering to isolate whilst you’re waiting for your result.

I'd strangle the bastard

And do 15 to life for him?

No chance.

Would be good if the OP came back to fill us in on his doubtless unquantifiable redeeming qualities though.

Your DH is a controlling arsehole, and you should have been able to deal with your own post, as should your DS.
On the flu jab front, I got an invitation from my GP practice this morning, logged on instantly to book, but couldn't get an appointment within the time parameters of the system, so it doesn't look as if I'll be getting it for at least a fortnight anyway. So don't fixate on that. You have plenty of other shit to deal with.

He has no care for you does he. What a way to live.