to be having a crisis of confidence about volunteering for the youth offending early intervention team?

[colditz]

I went to the training, and have more on Monday - and ALL the other volunteers are young female degree students - not one over 22, all frighteningly intelligent - and then there's me. Rapidly approaching 30, single mother of two, bored housewife, left school at 16, far too fat and more than a little common.

Oh gawwwwd I feel really inadequate! They are all so young, bright and shiny, so clever and enthusiastic. Furthermore, I am the only person in my area, so I feel that the whole town's youth is relying on my crappiness ohhhhh sobsobsobn

Stop feeling sorry for yourself

You are at least as intelligent as those other women and, being common, will seem like less of a middle class do gooder to the people you are trying to help. Not that I think you're common but YSWIM. You have more life experience and they will respect that.

I think it's fantastic what you're doing. Best of luck with it.

Yowtch, have been caught wallowing in self pity!

I agree with NineUT - you have loads more experience & knowledge of life than the shiny young things & will be able to offer loads more words of wisdom. You will be great !

Thank you. I will calm down, I will go and do this, but I am scared.

You'll be fab.

You have life experience, it counts for a lot. And they seem so intelligent etc. because of the confidence the arrogance of youth gives them! I thought much more of myself when I was younger because I didn't know any better.

I am sure you will be fab! You are no-nonsense but caring from your posts and being a bit common will help. It helped me when I was working with pupils with behaviour problems in schools. Plus you'll get more respect as an older person.

I guess I'm worried that I am going to be completely ineffectual at engaging them, as I will be closer to their parents age than their own, whereas the other volunteers have just left teenagedom themselves.

You have been to the university of life. Unlike a young graduate you have experienced knocks in life. They may well find it easier to relate to you.

But the teenagedom of the other volunteers may well have been completely different - more priveleged for a start - and like MrsPickles said, some of them will be doing it for their cv rather than any real altruism or interest.

You don't need to compare yourself with the others. Whether they become fantastic volunteers or not is neither here nor there. What counts is that you become the best YOU can be. And as for the engaging young people, well that is what you are being trained for.

Thank you tahnk you thank you - you are utterly right and sensible, I am being irrational and silly.

Thank you!

I worked as a vounteer for the Youth Offending Team when I was 27 (some 8 years ago) and most of the volunteers were mature.

I related very well with the Youths I had contact with - I think more so than the younger ones did.

I used to work as a nurse on an adolescent secure unit for male young offenders with serious mental health problems.

We used to get lots of temp staff who always used to fall into the 2 camps you describe!

The bright young things would be getting their work experience in before they went off to do their psychology doctorates and TBH lovely girls but sometimes totally clueless.

We used to grab the ladies of your ilk with both hands cos they could TOTALLy relate to the lads and they made eveything run a lot more smoothly.

Not least because of some of the bright shiny lot used to turn up to work looking like they were going clubbing!!

you'll be much needed, fab and very valued I've no doubt.

Best of luck tho, they're a gruelling group!! xx

colditz, I inadvertently did some work with offending youth (volunteered dh to take on apprentices youths who had been permanently excludeded from school and ended up having to do all the coordination and laying lots of the ground rules). These kids DO NOT need or want a pal. All the ones I encountered desperately needed parenting. The biggest problem that they had was that there was no one to guide them into real life and adult society. No one to take them to get a youth pass at the train station. Things that we take for granted like getting a photo and a copy of a birth certificate or other identifying info, is absolutely beyond the world of these kids. How to dress for work or school. How to speak to adults or bosses or teachers. How to show up on time for work or school (eg buy and alarm clock, find out the train/bus times, buy a bus pass in advance, what to do if you get on the wrong bus, or a bus passes you by, how to calculate how much time to leave to get to a job/school on time). My experience was that these many of kids weren't actively seeking out a life of crime, but rather, just didn't even know where to begin to do otherwise and therefore just fell into it. Good luck...I'm sure you will be extremely effective at it and find that your life and parenting experience will take you much further than an education. And who cares how much you weigh. And what the hell does common mean (it's one of those British phrases that I abhor...what's wrong with being one of the people?)?