To hope one of them blows their fucking fingers off?

[QuestionableMouse]

I've already rang the police.

For the last few nights, there has been a gang of lads fucking about on a bit of waste land near my house. They're probably a half a mile away across a big field but it's really quiet here and the sound travels. It sounds like they're blowing spray paint cans or something up, and there's a fire that I can see. I'm so fucking, fucking sick of it.

The only problem is the police can't catch them because the little fuckers are on dirt bikes and just vanish across the fields while the police are stuck on the road (and also, due to where I live, it takes a police car ages to get here.) I've rang the police on them three times alone in the past two weeks.

Aibu to hope one of them blows their nuts off so they'll pack it in?

Still no sign of the police so I'm heading to bed. I have to be at work at 8am! 😭😭😭

Yep, nails and tacks. Keep giving the little fuckers punctures and they might stop going there.

That all sounds quite worrying. Are you in a rural location? Is that why the police never turn up quickly enough to be of any use?

The parish council sound archaic and short sighted. If lack of light prevents filming, maybe neighbours could club together to install a few strategically placed solar powered lights, with inbuilt motion detectors, placed too high for the yobs to reach. The yobs might be less keen on hanging around if the land is lit up like a stadium every time they move! I feel angry on your behalf, I have insomnia and anxiety so can imagine why this is messing with your sleep.

I believe I've seen footage from motion-activated game and trail cameras available that use some type of night-vision. Maybe that could be useful, if the traditional CCTV won't work. It might be difficult to place it close enough to identify them, yet somewhere that they wouldn't see the camera, or at least not be able to access and destroy it.

It might not be practical if it's a large area, and maybe it wouldn't be allowed for some reason, but I wonder if the farmer could spread a thin layer (or just strategically placed drops) of manure or some other foul-smelling (but perfectly natural and harmless) substance. You wouldn't want something so stinky that it would negatively impact people living nearby, of course, but if the smell didn't carry too far, it might be enough to put them off.

If their vehicles aren't registered and they put hoodies on they aren't going to be identifiable with or without lights.

Hypothetically, of course, it’s better to slightly bury nails in the ground over the perimeter of the area than leaving tacks, more likely to penetrate the tires of the bikes and will - if secured in the ground - maybe give them a fright as their bike doesn’t evenly go forward. They’ll tear through the tires, and they can walk home slowly (and you call the police who can finally catch them) or leave the bike which the farmer can confiscate. Alternatively, you could work with the farmer to spread manure on the area to put them off, or maybe anti theft paint on the fencing/security stuff. Depending on whether there is a risk of fire spreading, you could rig something up that releases flour into the air when motion is detected (very flammable though and NHS is under pressure), or else install a mosquito noise device. All hypothetical, naturally.

My DH, a (proper) motorbike enthusiast, has joined in and also hypothetically suggests asking the farmer to put grass cuttings over the area as it’s easy to lose control on it. He says certain types of gravel are unworkable for dirt bikes too.

@WelcomeToGreenvale

Bored teenagers. I feel sorry for them rn. It's the farmer's job to keep them off his land and you need to be more persistent with him. He clearly hasn't done his best, he's made a pathetic couple of attempts to keep them away.

The farmer’s job is to farm his land, not waste time keeping bored teenagers off it!

I like the grass cuttings idea. More subtle than nails.

Buy an air rifle and a scope...

Land mines?

I know a farmer who dug a wide and deep drainage ditch 5ms into his property when he kept getting dirt bikers and mountain bikers cutting across.

A few broken ribs and destroyed bikes later...
The drainage was fixed.

The police are less than useless.
Nobody likes to admit it but sometimes strong male community direct action is the only thing that will get results.
Put it this way, if it was on a field next to a travellers community it wouldn't happen again after the first night.

Aibu to hope one of them blows their nuts off so they'll pack it in?

Not at all unreasonable, nuts blown off followed by some fire should sort them out.

Nothing nasty about it, just natural selection.

Does your area have a rural crime team? Round here they seem to deal with anti social behaviour in rural locations as well as poaching, theft of farm equipment etc. They also have off road vehicles so can get where normal police cars can’t.

When we lived near a local dogging spot the farmer sprayed the area with manure, soon put a stop to it.

Bored teenagers. I feel sorry for them rn. It's the farmer's job to keep them off his land and you need to be more persistent with him. He clearly hasn't done his best, he's made a pathetic couple of attempts to keep them away.

It’s not the farmers job at all. These teens shouldn’t be acting like anti social little twats. It says a lot about you that you feel sorry for them.
I’m sure many teens are bored at the moment with lockdown, they don’t go around acting like this.

@WelcomeToGreenvale

Bored teenagers. I feel sorry for them rn. It's the farmer's job to keep them off his land and you need to be more persistent with him. He clearly hasn't done his best, he's made a pathetic couple of attempts to keep them away.

You feel sorry for the anti social teens and think it’s the farmers fault gor not spending his own time and money keeping them out?

What would you suggest could keep a gang of young men out of a massive field in then middle of the night?

@Kissmycousinkate

When we lived near a local dogging spot the farmer sprayed the area with manure, soon put a stop to it.

Love that!!!!

Is an air gun useful in this situation 🤷‍♀️

A sniper, just a little nick to the ankle..

Manure seems like the cheapest option!

@NiceGerbil

I imagine they're bored as all fuck.

Teens fucking around are very annoying and so for that YANBU.

I assume you're not actually wanting them to have their fingers/ bollocks blown off!

When you've had experience of this - we had groups of 30 youths going round throwing fireworks at houses, cars, each other - it's not at all unreasonable to wish they'd hurt themselves to compensate for the terror they're causing to the community. Little bastards.

I wonder if the local dog walking community could leave some strategically placed piles of poo. Horses too?

It’s the farmer that needs to be contacting the police.

In terms of priority - someone ringing police about noise is much less of a priority than someone ringing about someone on their property!