To wonder is it possible to actually be vegetarian

[Nostrings457]

I long to be a vegetarian (again). Returned to meat after 2 years of veggie nearly 10 years ago. I was brought up on (and am married to somone who thinks the same) the thought that its not a meal if it doesnt contain meat.

I like the taste of meat but i hate the whole process of chicken farms / how disgusting animals are treated.

My thoughts / questions are

1. I could just (gradually) eat less meat but cooking for DH and 3DC it diesnt last - I am all or nothing
2. I put a mental block on mental eating so i dont feel guilty but what I just saw on News @ 10 has made me face it
3. I am NOT an adventerous cook and think i would resort to cheese and bread (already anaemic so not a option)
4. If you are veggie and have DC how do you do this practically? Is it even possible? (I know this is the case IRL but genuinely dont know how i could manage it)
5. My DH would hate it and it would make cooking problematic

I've been an on/off vegetarian for 40yrs, I've just returned to meat after 2.5yrs of not eating it, although I would prefer not to eat meat. I can't stay healthy as a long term veggie, my ferritin levels are crap and I have to supplement even as a meat eater, but they hit the floor when I'm veggie, no matter how much iron rich food I eat, I also have a nickel intolerance, so can't consume the amount of legumes needed . My DH doesn't really eat any meal without meat and I get so sick of making separate meals, especially with a fussy teen thrown into the mix. Quorn makes us all ill and being an old style veggie I'm grossed out by most fake meat replacements - the idea is to be healthier, so why consume something so heavily processed.

But having said all that, I'm leaning towards veggie again, already planning a Christmas veggie feast.

We have a complicated arrangement in our house, dh and one dc is veggie. I’m happy to be 90% veggie but other dc likes meat!
I don’t make the carnivore dc special meals as such but do buy him pieces of chicken, fish, sausages etc. He’s really fussy anyway so it’s no more complicated than it would be otherwise

One thing worth considering if you can afford it is gousto boxes. Really nice recipes that have gone down really well, good veggie selection. And although we no longer pay for it we still use the recipes- has kick started me into cooking nice veggie meals again after being stuck in a rut. Your dh might be pleasantly surprised. Pm me if you’d like an offer code for a cheaper first month.

And actually Dh being veggie basically means I don’t eat meat anymore unless out (and that’s not very often atm). It has come naturally to me and although I really like a good piece of fish occasionally it’s no bother. Hopefully you can persuade your dh to go down the road- in my case it has happened slowly but quite naturally. I don’t put pressure on myself to be entirely veggie though, is unlikely to happen.

I've been vegetarian for over 30 years. The rest of the household - DP and 3 DCs - are meat-eaters. It's not really a problem. If the kids are eating early, I usually cook them meat, and then DP and I will have something vegetarian, or something with separate meat for him. If we're all eating together, I usually cook myself something vegetarian and they all have meat, or we do something with several small dishes - Indian, Lebanese, Greek etc. Sometimes I'll add meat at the very end to an otherwise vegetarian dish - cauliflower cheese with added ham for example.

I very rarely try to make a traditionally meat-based meal into something vegetarian with meat substitutes. I just cook stuff that's naturally vegetarian. We all like vegetable curries, and we eat a lot of paneer, halloumi, lentils etc.

@contrmary humans are animals too. And we are not obligate meat eaters. Our teeth and intestinal system show this. I suggest you watch Gamechangers on Netflix to learn a bit more.

As for not caring once something is dead, I have no words. Aside from Non human animal welfare, modern intensive farming has a lot to answer for in terms of water and soil pollution and greenhouse gas and carbon emission. Workers in slaughterhouses suffer incredibly high rates of mental health problems. Processed meat is carcinogenic. It’s not just about animal suffering. If you want to know more about this I suggest the excellently researched book Farmegeddon. Because frankly you really need to educate yourself.

Sorry in advance for the long message, however, I think it is really good you are wanting to transition. My advice (as well as the meal ideas) is try not to be hard on yourself, buy ethically sourced meat if you can to get rid of some of your guilt, and importantly if children are old enough make them do the extra washing up your veggie transition causes.

Meal 1: 3 bean chilli for you and beef for the family. Make a basic chilli base and add kidney beans to simmer while cooking beef in another pan. Add half the bean chilli mix in with the beef and simmer for your family. In the original pan add in another two cans of beans (black eyed beans and black beans most likely), another can of tinned tomatos if necessary and if anaemic a bag of spinach. Serve with rice and if concerned about protein cheese and sour cream. Then freeze your leftover bean chilli to have one every week or two alongside different sides when you can’t have the family meat meal, eg. Chilli and jacket potato, chilli and rice, chilli nachos, Chili tacos ect.

Meal 2: Sausage casserole. Make a sausage casserole, mash potatoes and maybe a side of broccoli or other green (good source of protein too), but cook sausages separately and add into two pots at end for final summer. Meat sausages for family and either Richmond or cauldron for you (although you 100% could trick whole family with Richmond).

Meal 3: Shepherd’s pie. Make a normal meat and veg filling shepherds pie for family. Make a smaller lentil one for you (lots of recipes online). Most the non- meat ingredients will be the same, eg. Carrots, peas, onion ect so you will be chipping for both meals. Then top with mash and a generous serving of cheese as you said you are a big cheese fan. Serve with same greens on side, maybe kale if concerned about iron.

Meal 4: Risotto (presuming your family eat it). Chicken and mushroom for family. Mushroom, pea, and spinach for you. Make a mushroom risotto as normal, cook chicken on side. Add just over half the risotto for the rest of the family into the chicken pan. In the other pan add in frozen peas and a bag of spinach. Serve with garlic bread (as butter has protein haha) if you would like!! Freeze any leftovers again for when you need a quick meal/meat free option when family meal is harder to adapt. This is also a perfect opportunity for you to try a chicken substitute if you would like, eg. Tesco own brand, asda own brand, fry’s, plant pioneers etc.

Meal 5: Chicken curry and paneer and spinach curry ( start with paneer but also can do chickpea and sweet potato/aubergine/potato spinach or try another chicken substitute). Make a curry base (can use jar if not from stratch), fry chicken on side. Split in roughly half, adding half to the chicken and veg one. Add a veggie option to the other half. Serve with rice and Naan. If you do not like the paneer or chickpeas or whatever, do not feel too guilty if you end up eating the meat curry or get one of your earlier meals out the freezer.

Meal 6: Fajitas. Fry fajitas veggies (mushroom, pepper, onion etc) in one pan, chicken in another, and if you wish maybe seitan or tempeh in another (these are a more naturally found chicken substitute but could also use one of the subs you tried earlier/a new one). Serve all in separate bowels on table, sides of guac, salsa, cheese, sour cream, maybe an actually side like sweet potatoes wedges. Then the whole family can help themselves ato build fajitas and you maybe actually find they like sietan or whatever meat free option you try.

Meal 7: roast dinner. Make your usual roast dinner veggies, meat, potatoes etc. However, for yourself make some veggie haggis (or veggie sausages, seitan etc). Serve as usual and maybe even your children will like the veggie haggis.

Other meals that work on same principle are Thai veg/Thai chicken curry, paella, tacos, sausage and mash, etc

When I married DH he hated vegetables/beans etc so eat mainly meat and carbs. I was a vegetarian of 15+ years. Rather than cook 2 separate meals we usually made a veggie meal and he added meat and/or removed the veg he didn't like. Having tried lots of different veggie meals (not just the tasteless stuff offered in chain restaurants at the time and his mum's veg that had been boiled to death) he started to really like it and ate far less meat anyway. Eventually he only ate meat/fish when we were out (mainly cos he enjoyed the veggie meals and couldn't be bothered cooking meat as well). He's now completely vegetarian, after doing some reading for himself about factory farming etc.

Obviously not suggesting you try to 'convert' your family but I think trying lots more meat free dishes can help change the perception that a meal is not a meal without meat. You could perhaps try all eating meat free half the week.

We are not vegetarians but we are moving to a more vegetarian diet (several days a week) and will probably get more so when ds moves out.

These are some of the things we cook regularly:

pasta with different vegetarian sauces or toppings: pesto, roasted vegetables

homemade vegetable soup with toasted cheese sandwiches and a nice pudding to round off

enchiladas with vegetable fillings

lentil stews, either Indian dahls or with coconut milk

vegetable stew with dumplings

stir fries

Thai stir fries (bought sauce)

falafel

Persian pilav (with pistachios and cranberries) and roast vegetables

I bought some cheap vegetarian/vegan cookery books and am working my way through them, but you don't really have to: there is so much on the internet these days.

Richmond vegetarian sausages are the closest to meat sausages I have ever eaten. My parents prefer them now to the original

When you take meat out you need to add protein back in, so if you don't do quorn or tofu your alternatives are beans, lentils, cheese, eggs. Halloumi and paneer are the veggie gamechanger cheeses in my opinion but you should try things out and see what you like. Big chunks of mushroom can also be lovely and meaty especially if you fry them before putting them in things. There are loads of good recipes in the Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall Veg book and he's not really a vegetarian so his recipes are geared up to someone new to the whole thing.

There are some good suggestions above about how to cook a veggie and a meat version of the same meal, or you could take our family approach which is that the person who does the cooking decides what to cook - and I say that as the person who rarely does the cooking.

Or you could just CBT yourself into being ok with eating meat, seeing as vegetarianism is impossible and I am therefore a figment of my own imagination

You make the main meal vegetarian and add meat or you eat meals with lots of components, like fajitas or roast dinner, and make sure there is enough protein rich veggie options. Make sure to switch to a vegetarian gravy/stock

I'm trying to take the family towards vegetarianism. We've cut down meat gradually and now only eat it once per week. The issue is finding sources of protein that the kids like, as they are not into legumes. We eat cheese and yoghurt to replace meat mostly. I supplement all of us with vitamins and iron. I'm still experimenting with new recipes.

You have said you hate the whole process of chicken farms, and by extension I assume all intensively farmed meat. Why not just reduce your intake but then buy better more expensive, locally raised meat.

I am trying to do this, and have been cutting down on meat, upping fish, but buying all my meat from the local farm. Believe me, the cows and pigs and chickens and ducks roam around the farm having a lovely time, and are slaughtered on-site. Happy local meat is the way to go.

There is also a field of sheep opposite my house, and they have a lovely time too, frolicking about, and eating grass. I wouldn't have a problem eating them either.

Honestly I think your only option is to cook 2 versions of it.

dd and dh are strictly vegi. I eat meat.

dh hates quorn so will only eat stuff like vegetable curries, chilli. DD likes quorn so has quorn versions. I can't stand quorn so either cook myself a meat version, or eat the veg version or eat toast!

If your dh won't eat meals without meat I don't see the other options? If you were ok with quorn you could potentially have tried passing quorn meals off as meat.

I'm vegetarian, have been most my adult life. Was vegan for a few years before having kids too.

It definitely is possible. I'd recommend watching some documentaries to really bring home your reasons for it. Then go on YouTube and watch some inspiration videos for dinners the whole family will like (lasagne, shepherds pie, curries, Mexican, sausage casserole etc all still absolutely possible).

My 2.5 yr olds are vegetarian. And they drink soya milk. No problems there. They have vitamin D and Omega 3. They have cheese other bits of dairy for B12.

I think it comes down to motivation really and getting confidence when cooking. Making a meal plan may help.

I'm vegetarian, DH and DD are not - though DD doesn't really like meat. We eat mainly vegetarian food, with meat on a Sunday. That's normally something where I can use a veggie substitute eg sausage and mash, roast dinner. It's quite easy for us but DH is not a there must be meat or it isn't a meal sort of a person.

You could buy meat from a local organic farm and butchers and as it will be more expensive eat less meat?

I’ve been veggie for 20 years and I am bringing my kids up veggie. If they decide they want meat later on that’s fine and their choice.

I like cooking and trying new simple recipes so it works for me. The kids are less adventurous so have a more basic version of what we have ie they will have cream of tomato soup and we will have something like celeriac or butternut soup. I will make a veg chili and they will have rice with veg and wraps. I make a mushroom and kale lasagne and they will have veg pasta and sauce.

I really love cooking so it's not that much of a challenge, but I basically just cook lots of Ottolenghi dishes, or dishes from Nigel Slater's recent veggie cookbooks (Greenfeast) if I want something simpler. My partner is veggie and eats anything I put in front of him without complaint, but a lot of my friend's husbands claim to be die hard meat eaters and they always seem to enjoy my food (and they're not being polite as they are all very straight talking!). I do get the 'where are the sausages' comments but they still munch it all down with gusto.

The key is lots of flavour and a hefty dose of fat for good mouth feel.

I'd suggest changing your everyday recipes gradually.
A chilli, for example, can still be chilli con crane with a couple of different beans, chopped onion and peppers, mushrooms in as well as the meat. It changes the flavour and makes it 'lighter' somehow to have lots of veg in so that may get noticed but it's still chilli con carne. If you then add some green lentils as well the next time it will still be chilli con carne. Then if the next time you omit the meat it is still 95% identical to the previous chilli so it won't be obvious at all.

It's a matter of teaching your (and your DHs) tastebuds to not just associate the taste and texture of meat with certain dishes.

You can serve meat alongside lots of veggie mains, but your life will be simpler if you only have to do that a couple of times a week instead of everyday.
Even if you don't make it all the way to full time veggie: a couple of meat free days is good for the animals, good for the environment, and unless you are prone to anaemia like a pp it's good for you as well !

I am the only vegetarian in the house and have been vegetarian since I was 17. To be honest I don't think about it but generally adapt meals where I can eg stir fry and cook chicken separately and then add. My husband quite like vegetarian food. I often cook and freeze things

I will add that it is actually impossible for us as a family to give up our meat and fish, with veggies. DH and DD, have FODMAP issues, so that takes out onions, garlic, peppers etc, I can't eat anything pulsy or beany, and I don't like sloppy food, like curries, it's a texture thing. So...... meat and veg, and fish and salad, it has to be.

DP and I went vegetarian last year, we find it easy. Just don't buy meat.

I was raised vegetarian in the 80s and 90s, before it became common. I only started eating meat a few years ago when I turned 30.

I think it does take some extra effort to make it work properly. My mum is a great vegetarian cook in the old school 70s mould - lots of healthy, hearty food with beans, lentils etc. She was a SAHM though with lots of time for that. I ended up getting lazy and just having pasta and tomato sauce etc which is why I started to eat meat and fish.

I still don't eat a lot of meat or fish and could gladly go back to being vegetarian. It is less of a hassle to have the option of meat though and easier to get a balanced diet with less effort. I'm planning on giving my DC a mostly vegetarian diet but will throw the odd bit of meat / fish in for convenience.

You can chuck a steak, chicken breast or seared prawns on top of most veggie dishes to make it a meaty meal - just make sure you are getting your protein too. I'd also buy www.amazon.co.uk/Isa-Does-Amazingly-Delicious-Recipes/dp/0751555460?tag=mumsnetforu03-21
or one of the BOSH books to get some great veggie ideas - these are vegan but I think that's a good place to start book wise as they focus on getting protein sources into meals (usually).

I went pescatarian gradually, although I rarely eat fish now. Would suggest easy swaps:

Chilli
I recommend this all the time but it's amazing www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/burnt-aubergine-veggie-chilli

Stew
I replace beef with mushrooms for beef stew/steak and ale pies etc.

Curries
I usually use fish in Jamie Oliver's 5-ingredient fish curry () but have also made it with chickpeas.

Use lentils for dals (loads of recipes online for quick 15-min dals) or we sometimes just have veg curry. Google Meera Sodha for loads of vegan curry recipes.

Casserole
Most veggie casseroles have lentils in for protein. I've also used them as a sub in shepherd's/cottage pies. Chunky veg is key! Something like this? www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/vegetarian-casserole

Burgers and chips/salad
Beyond Burgers (available Tesco) and The Meatless Farm Co (Sains + Asda) are so similar to meat, my meat-eating partner said he couldn't tell the difference.

Mexican
Refried bean enchiladas instead of meat.

Perhaps commit to a few veggie days a week and see how you get on. That's what we did and I haven't looked back, I really don't miss meat at all.