To leave my 7.5 year old home alone today?

[brewbrewbrew]

She's off school as the bubble are isolating and I had school runs to do today.
Was fine for the morning run as dh was here but not for the afternoon one.

I drive a 7 seater car and had been given a curtesy car for the day. This car only has 5 seats and I needed 6 if dd was going to fit in.

I couldn't do anything else at short notice. The others were at school and needed collecting.

I spoke to her beforehand about the dangers and what to do if x or y happened, explained she could use Alexa to call my mobile also if there was a problem. I was gone about 15 minutes in total.
Even if I'd have walked (which isn't so close) she wouldn't have been able to come to the school with me as they've sent the bubble home. But at least next time I can leave her in the car if needs be now we've got the big one back.

I came home and she was where I'd left her, on the sofa watching tv lying down on her iPa

Is this awful of me? I feel so negligent.

Jesus Christ.. Just reading some of these comments are absolutely ridiculous lol.. you did what you did due to the circumstances, she’s fine, everything was fine. Not a big deal at all!! X

Yes I would absolutely have done this and my kids have somehow staggered to adulthood unscathed. But then I was a primary school latch key kid in the 70s.

Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. A sensible 7 year old is not a baby. If she was ok with it and we'll briefed on don't eat anything, don't answer the door, what to do if etc. I don't think you have anything to feel bad about at all. You know your child, and the risk of something happening to her while watching a video in her safe home for 15 minutes are absolutely minuscule.

No dont feel guilty. Its done now. Dont waste time feeling guilty. You know your own child and assessed the situation. I would have (and have done) the same. You're the mum and you know each of your children better than anyone your asking on here

It is what it is , you all survived.
Ideally no she shouldn’t have been left but maybe this will get you to have a back up plan for future issues
Don’t be to hard on yourself
Life is hard

Obviously it's not ideal but we're living in extraordinary times and if that was the only way of making it work then so be it. You mitigated the risks by making sure she knew what to do in an emergency and at the end of day, she's fine! Please don't beat yourself up about it and don't listen to the judgemental comments. Honestly there are such nasty and cutting comments on here, I'm shocked. I've just remembered why I don't go on MN very much 🙄

Seems an odd position to be in...
have you 5 kids?

God why do posters not RTFT anymore?

I don’t think it’s that bad don’t beat yourself up. I have left my 8 year old briefly with her almost 12 year old brother. I personally wouldn’t leave her alone in the house but like you say it was a short amount of time.

Im sorry but you are in the wrong here and the fact you are asking the question, shows you know it

Totally fine. Relax. From 7 yrs old i left my son in front of the tv twice a day to take the dogs on the feild opposite house for half hour. He grew up to be very responsible because i trusted him. @brewbrewbrew

Please don't beat yourself up about this, your daughter was fine and you explained everything to her that she needed to know incase of an emergency. People saying you should have kept your kids off are wrong, school would have fined you for this as they expect siblings still to go in.
I've had to start leaving my 11 year old home alone when she's off ill, and I've already explained to my 9 year old I'll have to do the same with her if she's ill as I'll still need to walk her sisters to school and I'm out the house for an hour minimum.
And before anyone asks, no i have no one near to help me and my husband is out the house from 7am everyday so he can't help either

You probably don’t need any more comments but I don’t think you did anything bad. You know your own child and it was only 15 minutes. It’s very unlikely that anything awful would happen in that time. I have two daughters who are older now and I would have left one of them for a short time in an emergency but definitely not the other. It really does depend on the individual child.

YANBU You did what you had to do in the circs

No I don't think you were being unreasonable - you had every reason to do this. Irresponsible though? I'd say so.

YANBU. It was 15 minutes. She was fine.

I would have done the same. In fact, I have done many times. Can’t remember how old was my son first time I left him alone but probably around that age. Kids are capable of a lot more than we give them credit for. We think they can’t cope because we project our own insecurities on them. In Europe kids walk to school on their own almost since starting school. They play outside in the playgrounds on their own and nobody bats an eyelid. Less mollycoddling.
The most important thing is to teach your kids what to do in emergencies and what these might be. Make sure they know where the keys are in case of emergency, how to contact neighbours or FaceTime us from the iPad. I even explained to my son how to contact ambulance service and when because I used to travel with work a lot and husband has diabetes...
So no, YANBU. No way.
Also... if she’s isolating... surely she’s not to leave the house and go on the busy school run, right?

@Rachie4444

My dd1 is 11, doesn’t walk to school alone nor does she play out alone, I don’t understand these comments

If you are a single parent working full time on a low income and your child is starting secondary then what else can you do? It's normal to walk or catch public transport to school at 11 and many children are home alone until parents get home from work. Some in year 5 or 6, childcare is expensive.

YANBU. It was 15 minutes. I would do, and have in the past, left my young dc on their own for very short periods. When I was 10, years ago, I used to have to pick my 6 year old brother up from school and look after him for an hour til my single mum came home from work. I survived, as did my young brother.

I'm living in Denmark. Here it is normal to leave a 7.5 year old at home alone for a short time like that to 'develop independece'. What the 'received wisdom' seems to be (I'm not Danish) is that it is recommended around the time the kid is starting school, at around age 6. I have a 6 year old son who I have left home alone while I collect his 3 year old sister from daycare. Nothing ever happened (like you I have told him what to do) and no one bats an eye. Reading these responses maybe you should just move country :D.

Meh, my DD is the same age and I’ve left her and her 5 year old brother home alone for 20 mins or so if I’ve had to run out to the shop. They’re well behaved, sensible kids and they are in their own home.

Op I don't understand how schools expect parents to manage when they have children in isolation and others who are still attending an parents who are single or like you stuck for a drop off /pick up

This really isn't thought through, one mum at my dc school last week as the head pulled her at the playground and said her son wasn't allowed on the school site as he should be isolating (she didn't actually know at the time an he was dressed to go to school) she burst out crying they pretty much shamed her and she has 5 in the school on her own! I had to say to him what on earth is she ment to do ?? She has 4 other kids in the school she cannot just leave her kid. Really not thought through
They should atLeast have 1 teacher mayybe on the school car park to stand with them kids who have to isolate so parents can drop the others off or pick them up without the full stress!

But may I ask what would you have done if dd was in school and you only had the 5 seats anyway?

Op I don't understand how schools expect parents to manage when they have children in isolation and others who are still attending an parents who are single or like you stuck for a drop off /pick up

To be fair you can't blame the school, blame the people who made up the rules. And i agree the rules don't work for children. They haven't taken into account that children need care and looking after.

@Bikingbear oh I totally understand schools are just following what they've been told to do because they even say their sorry and they can't do anything and they agree it makes 0 sence.

I'm baffled how it's all been handled though !!

Yes I have done this occasionally and would do this again. Needs must. I wrote my mobile number and left it by the phone so child could ring me if needed. My mum used to leave me for several hours when I was that age when she went to work, because she had to. Honestly they just sit in front of the telly and don't even notice you're gone x

15 minutes is fine, especially if the kid is sensible.