To leave my 7.5 year old home alone today?

[brewbrewbrew]

She's off school as the bubble are isolating and I had school runs to do today.
Was fine for the morning run as dh was here but not for the afternoon one.

I drive a 7 seater car and had been given a curtesy car for the day. This car only has 5 seats and I needed 6 if dd was going to fit in.

I couldn't do anything else at short notice. The others were at school and needed collecting.

I spoke to her beforehand about the dangers and what to do if x or y happened, explained she could use Alexa to call my mobile also if there was a problem. I was gone about 15 minutes in total.
Even if I'd have walked (which isn't so close) she wouldn't have been able to come to the school with me as they've sent the bubble home. But at least next time I can leave her in the car if needs be now we've got the big one back.

I came home and she was where I'd left her, on the sofa watching tv lying down on her iPa

Is this awful of me? I feel so negligent.

Are there genuinely 2 seperate parents here worried about choking on biscuits?

@Allgreyeverything

My mum left me with my newborn brother when I was 8 years old for a few hours. We survived.

Survival is not enough. Really. The idea that you have brought an 8 year old being left with a newborn to the debate is batshit. You can't seriously think that strengthens any argument in OP' favour

I think it's not ideal but I am not sure what else you could have practically done. Not everyone has a "friendly neighbour" or someone else to collect the other children. MN is very inconsistant. I read a thread some time ago where someone was told she should leave a 9 year old who was off school ill alone all day so that she wouldn't let her employer down. I think leaving an unwell 9 year old all day is much worse than leaving a 7.5 year old for 15 minutes. I would just have been worried about being delayed for some reason. 10 minutes on the car can be equivalent to over an hours walk.

This is negligent of you. If something had gone wrong, you’d have been arrested for neglect.

I would have done exactly the same as you OP. At that age my DC would have been fine.

This is negligent of you. If something had gone wrong, you’d have been arrested for neglect.

Nonsense.

[quote brewbrewbrew]@JinglingHellsBells
for example choking on a biscuit or falling downstairs.

Choking on a biscuit? Why have I not spent all of my days worrying about this? Jesus Christ [/quote]
Not my fault if you have no imagination. :)

Why on earth did you post this anyway?

You aren't open to anyone criticising you or pointing out worst case scenarios and every post you have made is to defend your decision.

All a bit pointless really unless you only wanted a back-pat.

I wouldn't leave an 8yo to mind a baby, that's going over the line. On the basis Op took her 2yo on the school run means she probably wouldn't do it either.

As for leaving a 9yo all day, hmmm I can't imagine how pushed I'd be to do it. But I can see why people would.

@brewbrewbrew

Are there genuinely 2 seperate parents here worried about choking on biscuits?

If you mean me, I think you’ve misread my post- I’m agreeing with you!

@Sailingtelltales

Haven’t read whole thread apologies if already mentioned, but the simplest solution here was for your husband to call me home from work early or take half an hour off to look after the isolating child.

The phenomenal effort you’ve put into juggling all this when your partner should have simply helped by coming home. No job is more important than that.

So picture the scene. Dad's a surgeon and is in the middle of life saving surgery on a young child. Phone rings, he's needed at home to babysit for 15 minutes.

Or (perhaps more realistic) dad works several miles away but goes in by public transport (perfectly normal in London/SE). He's in a meeting and hasn't brought his personal phone in, or it's switched off. Comes out an hour later to a voice message, and it will take another hour to get the train home.

It may be the simplest solution for you but that doesn't mean it's the simplest solution for everyone else.

OP I'm not a parent but it seems you did what you felt was the only option. There's so much judgement going on. Don't beat yourself up, it'sdone now, and the child is fine.

Wow ppl are so judgemental. You did what you needed OP.

You know your child and you made the call based on that. Gosh I remember playing outside on my own at that age and possibly staying at home alone whilst my mum had to nip out.

Each to there own. You feel bad about it but needs must x

OK babysit's the wrong word, for any MNetter planning to jump on me for that.

I really don't see what other option you had here other than husband not going to work (not always feasible) or step mum collecting? (Again, I don't know if that was feasible)

I probably would have done same thing but asked neighbours to keep an eye out for anything suspicious

She was fine don't fret but try to make contingency for future occasions.

Nothing bad happened however children run across the road without looking and are fine but this doesn't make it safe as some do get knocked down. She was safe this time, next time may not be so fortunate.

Her being in a car with 5 other people isn't exactly 'isolating', is it?

If you've brought up your child to be sensible enough to be left for 15 minutes, then that would be fine.

@JinglingHellsBells it's not that I'm not open to criticism. I just think worrying about if my 7yo might choke on a biscuit is ridiculous.

I don't worry about if my toddler chokes on a biscuit when I'm bringing the shopping in from the car or doing the dishes,

I did ask what you would have done a few times but you haven't responded?

Either my parents were overprotective or your parents didn’t give a toss about your safety but I was never left alone as a young child. The first I started gaining independence was when I was almost 11 where I got to walk to and from school alone because of high school. 7 is so young to be left alone. A lot of parents here using their own crap experiences of childhood and their preference to avoid inconvenience to justify leaving children unsupervised. Yes kids play out but they have the ability to get their parent or guardian if they need to, a child left home alone is reliant on the parent returning which may be significant delayed because of a whole host of reasons because that’s life. Meh whatever, it’s not how I’d choose to parent my kids - safety, basic care needs being fulfilled trumps the convenience of parents.

@Fouroclockonamarblemorning

This is negligent of you. If something had gone wrong, you’d have been arrested for neglect.

Read the thread and you will discover why you are wrong.

@Wife2b

Hahahahahahahahahaaa!!!

Love the way you conflate being left home for short periods of time with a crap childhood

I think you are helping to make the point about hysteria on this thread.

I grew up in Scandinavia, it was weird if you didn’t walk to the school bus alone (20 mins each way), or play out all day (in snow holes/fishing on lakes and other potentially deadly pursuits).

My family lived in Asia for years and it is normal to see kids this age on their own using public transport, cooking on woks with open fires etc.

People need to get a grip.

This is terrible. Don't do it again, a 7 yr old is far too young to be left to fend for herself.

[quote JinglingHellsBells]@CastleOfDoom The child is 6. Not 12/13/14.

Why are you bringing those ages up?[/quote]
Erm because the PP I was replying to said they would never ever ever leave a child alone ever. I was saying what even if they are older?

I know the DC in question was 7.5 and I answered that part saying it was perfectly fine. HTH

@Caplin

Ha good spot! I didn’t realise it had written like that. I didn’t mean overall childhood, I meant crap parenting within their own childhood re lack of safety conscious. I know we’ll still disagree though

@2bazookas

This is terrible. Don't do it again, a 7 yr old is far too young to be left to fend for herself.

15mins is hardly fend for herself, it's not like Op left her all day to cook the lunch and dinner.

My son wasnt left until he was 10. 7.5 is a bit young to be honest.

@2bazookas

This is terrible. Don't do it again, a 7 yr old is far too young to be left to fend for herself.

"Fend for herself" Yes OP I hope she didn't die of starvation in those 15 minutes!!