Never get to finish my snacks

[SnackyLady]

Bit of a lighthearted one (but I'm also a bit annoyed!)

So sometimes in the evenings me and DH will have snacks after dinner, like some biscuits or some crisps or something. Not every night but some evenings as a treat.

Whenever we buy snacks we each specifically buy what we want for ourselves. So if I want chocolate I will get the type of chocolate I want and won't share that. Same with DH, he will get what he wants and I would not have any of that because it was for him if that makes sense. So we both have our individual snacks and that's fine. A lot of the time I won't finish all of mine, for example the other day I really fancied some Doritos, had about half a bag and then put it away.

Also worth noting that DH stays up later than me by a few hours.

The problem is the next day / evening I'll be thinking ooh lovely I've got crisps left I'll have one now and they're all gone because DH has eaten the rest of mine after I've gone to bed.

It's just annoying to me that I never get to eat all my snacks? I bought the crisps for me to eat. Don't get me wrong I don't begrudge him food, but if he wanted Doritos then he should have said and he could have had his own bag. This has happened a few times and it's just irritating me that none of my snacks will last until the next day.

Am I justified in being irritated by this?

Next time you're shopping, buy two of all your picks. If he queries it just tell him it's because he keeps eating them.

I would feel guilty making him feel bad by saying don't eat my snacks
He is your husband though I image you are close, just be open with him and say 'please don't eat the end of the bag I'm keeping it for tomorrow' no need to make it a big thing.

Why are so many posters having to hide food from their partners? Wtf?

I absolutely can’t imagine being with someone who I had to hide food from. If you’ve asked them not to eat your food and they do then that’s shitty and disrespectful.

I voted YABNU but then changed it to YABU after I read that you haven't mentioned his poor manners to him for fear of 'embarrassing him'. WTF is all that about? Is he so delicate a flower that asking him not to eat something you've bought as a treat for yourself will crush him? He doesn't even really want them as he would have bought them himself if he did as he doesn't know for sure that you won't finish them. He's just being a greedy pig. Why do you think it's ok for him to be so selfish and greedy and disappoint you and disregard your feelings by eating it all but you don't dare embarrass him by stating that you'd like to actually eat the treats you bought? He's clearly not actually embarrassed as he keeps doing it. Good grief just tell him not to eat it!

These threads appear with depressing regularity. Women having to hide their snacks from greedy, selfish, supposedly adult men.

I don't understand if you know him well enough to marry him, you can't just talk to hin

@Pollypocket89

I don't understand if you know him well enough to marry him, you can't just talk to hin

This! It's ridiculous that there are all these relationships where people can't have a simple conversation with their partner over some crisps. If you really can't communicate about that then you have far deeper issues than dorito theft.

YANBU to leave any Doritos

I think you’ll have take your crisps to bed.

@TwentyViginti

These threads appear with depressing regularity. Women having to hide their snacks from greedy, selfish, supposedly adult men.

Because they are the same poster

Hide his snacks, when he looks for them, tell him you ate them as that’s how it works now.

Then give him his chocolates once he has looked miserable for a while. Point out that it’s very disappointing to think you have a wee treat to find it gone!
Hopefully he’ll understand the message.

Incant believe you're married and can't tell him a simple thing like leave your snacks alone 🤦‍♀️ Just tell him! So he'll be embarrassed? So bloody what? He's being rude

@bruffin are you calling troll? The thing is there are at least ten other posters in the thread merrily telling the OP that they hide their food! (Because apparently they are happy to have a selfish, disrespectful, man child with no self control as their partner.)

Could you not just say something like, “I’m putting the rest of my crisps back to finish another night”.
If he still does it graduate to asking why when he knew you were saving them?
I really don’t want to be mean, but if you’re married with no other problems, this shouldn’t be a tricky conversation.
I’d far rather my DH talked to me rather than resorting to hiding things from me like I’m a child.

Maybe before hiding the snacks you could “warn” him - when he does it again and looking guilty ask if you need to hide the things you are keeping for later as he clearly has a problem with his willpower.
it might just make him realise just how disrespectful you find it and ensure his guilt lasts long enough to ensure he doesn’t do it again.

@MiniCooperLover

Incant believe you're married and can't tell him a simple thing like leave your snacks alone 🤦‍♀️ Just tell him! So he'll be embarrassed? So bloody what? He's being rude

So rude and so selfish.

He knows exactly what he's doing.

He just thinks what he wants is more important.

I've been very very firm with a couple of teens that have done this.

It's really selfish.

Can't you just yell at him SNACKY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD.

I haven't said anything about it because I don't want to embarrass him

Absolutely baffling people have marriages where they can’t just say oi, stop eating my snacks!

DH and I do the same, either one of us might have the urge to finish the others crisps or whatever, we just make sure to buy another.

@SockDrawer

Why are so many posters having to hide food from their partners? Wtf?

I absolutely can’t imagine being with someone who I had to hide food from. If you’ve asked them not to eat your food and they do then that’s shitty and disrespectful.

Exactly!

And if they have kids, what does that teach them?

My best friend ended up with an awful binge eating problem because she couldn't even leave half an Easter egg in the fridge without her mum or dad eating it.

She soon learned as a child, that if she wanted any treats of her own she had to eat them all in one go, rather than self regulate.

It teaches them that men are entitled to take stuff that belongs to women if they feel like it, essentially.

And if women want to hang onto their stuff they need to lie/ be sneaky/ fool the men. Because obviously men don't care about helping themselves to the stuff.

When there was a thread on here about a man eating the kids food everyone was horrified. Eat the woman's food and it's just hohoho men eh, you'll just have to hide it.

@NiceGerbil

It teaches them that men are entitled to take stuff that belongs to women if they feel like it, essentially.

And if women want to hang onto their stuff they need to lie/ be sneaky/ fool the men. Because obviously men don't care about helping themselves to the stuff.

When there was a thread on here about a man eating the kids food everyone was horrified. Eat the woman's food and it's just hohoho men eh, you'll just have to hide it.

Why do think this is only a man problem, im sure women do exactly the same

Why wouldn't you share this is your life partner

We both pick up the snacks that we each fancy but then when we eat them, we share them and they then become fair game in the cupboard, once opened.

Why do think this is only a man problem, im sure women do exactly the same
Unfortunately I’m sure there are greedy, selfish women out there, just as there are men. But in this situation it’s a man. And in most cases of PP saying their partners do it too; they’ve explicitly said husbands.

This would drive me to INSANITY! If i was ever to be arrested it would be for somebody eating my snacks (no joke!)

When we do the food shop (family of 4) its a known rule that certain things we buy are for everybody so it's a case of everyone having equal amount or whoever doesn't get to it in the first few days misses out lol such as crumpets, bread, cereal, multipack crisps, yogurts, fruit, cheese etc.
Then we all have certain snacks we buy for ourselves, mine is normally chocolate or a big bag of crisps, DP's is similar, eldest DC will have cookies/muffins maybe and youngest has baby snacks so nobody touches hers anyway.
Unless somebody asks e.g on odd occasion DC might say can he have some chocolate that's mine or DP might offer me his crisps if he decides he doesnt fancy them etc, then it's a given rule that we wouldnt eat each others snacks.

My mum was a single parent most of my childhood and when she got remarried and my stepdad moved in he would raid the cupboards and eat everything before anybody else got a chance regardless of who it was brought for. I also had an ex who was the same, he would even get up in the night and eat things and 'claim' to have no memory of it. They are both lucky they are still alive!

@NiceGerbil

It teaches them that men are entitled to take stuff that belongs to women if they feel like it, essentially.

And if women want to hang onto their stuff they need to lie/ be sneaky/ fool the men. Because obviously men don't care about helping themselves to the stuff.

When there was a thread on here about a man eating the kids food everyone was horrified. Eat the woman's food and it's just hohoho men eh, you'll just have to hide it.

If you think it's only a man problem, I'm guessing you haven't logged into MN over Easter?

The amount of "Shall I steal some of my DC's Easter eggs because they've got too many?" threads are unbelievable and nearly always followed by "Ooh yes, you're only being kind to their teeth...tee hee hee" 🙄🙄

Way to teach kids to self regulate...NOT.

Doritos -once opened they’re fair game.

Same for Wotsits, Cheddars, Pringles.