Tonight I went to speak to my youngest child and....

[mineofuselessinformation]

and I had the sudden urge that I should put on a mask.
I'm not a dramatic person, but it actually happened and I'm really struggling with it.
My job involves wearing a mask and avoiding getting near to other people, so I'm very guarded about what I do.
But this isn't right is it?
I'm very aware of the risks involved with contact with other people, but this has brought me up short, so to speak.
I'm very lucky in that when I told DC about it (old enough to understand, thank goodness), they held me while I cried.
I still have to go to work, and I honestly don't know where I go from here.

I've been a bit distracted by RL, but am still reading.
Thank you to those posters who understood my feelings.

I think the original post was very misleading, when it didn’t need to be. You said you didn’t know where to go from here as you felt the need to wear a mask in front of your ‘youngest child’. I think most people are just getting on with it so posts like these seem a bit self-indulgent.

Years ago my job involved safety inspections on commercial properties. I subsequently found myself opening fire hose cupboards at hotels holiday and assessing the non-slip floor in restaurants. It's a natural occupational hazard to pick up these things. They wear off.
My mum was a catering manager and we were never allowed to put anything back in the fridge unless it was fully covered and on the right shelf 🤣

I don't think in general it is good to rely on your children for comfort, it should be the other way round until you are extremely old and ill. (Said as a parent of adults). Your job is to try to keep a positive/calm atmosphere.

@Paintedmaypole

I don't think in general it is good to rely on your children for comfort, it should be the other way round until you are extremely old and ill. (Said as a parent of adults). Your job is to try to keep a positive/calm atmosphere.

What's the op or anyone to do if they can't keep calm? It does no harm for another adult or even a teen to realise that life is not always a bed of roses. Would your adult children come to you if they were struggling? If so where did they learn that? If not then you've gone wrong somewhere.

What's your AIBU? I have no idea what you're asking here.

YABU for saying you're not a dramatic person (you are by the sounds of this).
YABU for not knowing where to go - you carry on.
YABU for being deliberately obtuse or vague in your OP.
YANBU for having support from an adult son/daughter but it would be unreasonable to be sobbing in the arms of a primary age child (that's not fair on the child to do that).
YANBU for realising that this whole situation is taking its toll mentally and emotionally on so many of us. You need to find your way of coping.

You sound incredibly fragile if you had to be held while you cried about the thought of putting on a face covering to be near your child That's not a normal response, and you should probably seek help if this persists.

thisisnotus - kudos to you for your insightful "help and advice" to the OP

lazyarse123 I am proud of how my children have turned out. They are very good parents. I did say TRY to keep a positive atmosphere. I hope my children could rely on me if things got very difficult for them. I think crying at the thought of wearing a mask is a bit extreme. If someone is very easily upset people may feel they need protecting, but, of course, we all have some situations where we find it difficult to control our anxiety, we can only do our best. I know I have one specific phobia that I can't hide .

Sorry you are getting a lot of flack OP. I think people on here forget that everyone is experiencing different levels of hardship and mental strain during the pandemic. A little kindness can go a long way in times like these.

Slightly related, but I found myself getting irrationally angry at Peppa Pig this morning. They'd gone to the supermarket as an entire family, instead of just one person, and were only buying a couple of bits, instead of doing an essential shop . I think it's incredible how quickly we have become primed to these new behaviours. I hope you are feeling better now.

I swear there's a breed who come on here thinking "right, who can I give a good arsing to today?"

@WorksTheDinerAllDay I'm still feeling a bit perplexed about it, to be truthful. I'm okay, though - a day at work has knocked some sense back into me!
@maggiethecat I guess that I shouldn't have posted on AIBU..... it does seems to bring out people who are happy to hand your arse to you on a plate. 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Paintedmaypole, I couldn't disagree more. Crying is a normal, physiological reaction. For example I am fairly stoic but the other day at the dentist ( routine, no pain) the tears rolled down my face. The dentist was lovely.
It wasn't to do with the dentist.

There is nothing " wrong" with children of all ages seeing what is a totally normal human reaction.
It's honest and open and there are many more ways to eff up the parent child dynamic using words.

Blimey the Rocky Horror show is in town today or what?

Don't quite understand why so many people are goading an upset OP?

Because they’re bored goady fuckers ?

@mineofuselessinformation - I refer to my grown children as 'my son/daughter'. Not 'my child'. I use the abbreviation DS/DD here but usually clarify that the people in question are adults.

mineofuselessinformation - good to hear you're feeling a bit better. It's been a hard time for everyone, although some don't even realise how deeply they've been affected.

I'm glad that vaccine is imminent and hopefully end of the nightmare in sight otherwise I might have ended running down the road starkers at some point.

@maggiethecat, I think that's the thing for me, that hit me hard - just how much our lives have changed, in so short a time.
If anyone had tried to tell me a year ago this would be how we are living now, I'd have thought they were delusional.
I'm sorry you're feeling it too.
FWIW, I think we all have to try to hold on to the good things we have, and as you've said, wait for the rest to (hopefully) pass.
In some small measure I feel glad for the posters who seem to be mostly unaffected, but I suspect that the majority are not. I hope for all of us that m, as they say, 'this too shall pass'.

I totally get it - DH stepped towards me to show me something on his phone recently and I instinctively stepped back - from my husband of 25 years. I was appalled at myself, but that's what we've become. It's necessary now to have these instincts, but it's still so sad.

I pulled a mask out my pocket and put it on when my husband approached me yesterday. It’s a new reaction as we’ve recently had a rule change at work and I am now forever pulling a mask on and off when people come towards me. I did surprise myself and thought it was a bit sad, but we laughed it off.

Lots of things are difficult at the moment OP and I’m sorry you were so upset. I get the point that people are making that it’s good for children to see life isn’t a bed of roses, but I would feel very worried and distressed if I had to hold my mum whilst she cried about wearing a mask. It’s cathartic to have a good cry sometimes, but perhaps not fair to put your needs on to others. I think it’s good to try and model some resilience to children even if you don’t always feel it. Hope you feel better.

I think that's the thing for me, that hit me hard - just how much our lives have changed, in so short a time.

As humans we find it very difficult to cope with change especially something that is a sudden big change.
If someone died suddenly, your relationship broke up suddenly etc are worse than having time to mentally adjust.

Is there anything about it that you are particularly stressed out about?
Have you lost a loved one or not seen a loved one for a while?
Has anything good come out of this that you will continue once it is over?