To think this is a huge data breach?!

[whattothinknow]

Hi all,

⚠️ Sorry this is a long post!! ⚠️

So I left the company I worked for, for 4 years - around 8 months ago.
I had made a really good, life long (or so I thought) 'friend' and we worked side by side in the office together for the entirety of my time within the company.
We were really close, would talk about everything - she was the first to congratulate me on my house move, my engagement etc and was always super lovely and supportive. I found I really confided in her like a best friend, and she did the same to me.
We would go out after work, on weekends.. sleep over at each others house after nights out, etc.
I was always going above and beyond for her, doing favours, lending money etc and didn't ever think twice about doing so.. after all, we were best friends.

When it came down to organising my wedding, she was there for me. She came to my dress appointment, was there when I said yes to the dress.
She came to the venue viewings, and was there when we said yes to our dream venue..

I asked her to be my maid of honour - and she was delighted and cried her eyes out at the gesture - it felt very genuine and I was honestly over the moon to have found such a great friend in a work colleague.

Fast forward a little - I left the company at the 4 year mark and moved onto a different department in the same business.
We were no longer sitting together in the office, and I was commuting to a different area of the country for work (same business)

We slowly lost contact - I would always reach out to see how she's getting on, check on her and be there for her. She never responded.
She would dig for information from me as and when she wanted to know gossip or what was going on in the company, but when I suggested meeting / wedding planning she would completely ghost me.. although I could see that she was online and active on various social media platforms constantly.. it made me feel quite uneasy and as though I'd done something wrong?!

I was then getting constant messages from another lady within our team, again digging for personal information from me - how much the wedding venue is, how much my dress was, how my relationship is going and how much my new salary is. I didn't feel comfortable disclosing any of this information, and didn't even really speak to this lady in the first place so this felt very odd.
I confided in my 'friend' and she apologised in the other colleagues behalf and said she will have a word and ask what's going on and why she was asking such sensitive information. Turns out from chatting to a different ex. Colleague in the office, the 'friend' was asking the other colleagues to dig for information from me and hound me. Really confused by this as I left the company on really good terms and was on good terms with this friend, before now.

I have since heard from two ex colleagues that I was fairly good friends with, to tell me that 'friend' had been awful and snide behind my back, even whilst I still worked there and sat NEXT to her in the same office (so before my move within the business).

She said awful, awful things about DP, claimed that I was with him for his wealth and that alone.

She said my engagement ring was tacky and fake, and way too big and 'slutty' for her liking and I didn't deserve such a large statement ring (I can assure you that it is a gorgeous subtle ring, and it is real, not that this should even matter as it's the act and the thought that means the most)

She was nasty and patronising about my weight, telling everybody that I 'barely squeezed' into my wedding dress (she was there when I said yes to the dress) and it made me look like a whale.. 😔

She was openly bitter and jealous when DP bought me a lovely diamond bracelet for my birthday.. I wore it every day and when she first caught a glimpse of it she asked me who got it for me, where from, if it was genuine etc.
I found this strange but replied 'yes it is genuine, it matches my ring, I adore it - it's so special to me!' And she didn't respond to that. Should have thought at that point, that that was strange.. 🤦‍♀️

What I heard next from the two ex colleagues completely blew me away. I was absolutely distraught and still feel well and truly betrayed. I have been in tears over this 😔

During my time in the company, I was having disputes with the management over my level of pay. We were on a commission scheme and I was doing a different role to the rest of my colleagues in the office (the role was hugely demanding, used to take 5 staff members to do this role but sadly as they left one by one, nobody was employed in their place so if came down to me carrying this role out alone) I was taking home £500/£600 less than the rest of the team a month for doing 5 times the work that they were. Never once was I bitter about this to them, but it did hurt knowing I was being taken advantage of by the company..

The 'friend' decided one day when I was away on holiday, go log into my PC (who knows how as it's all private passwords - but she did sit next to me so wonder if she made note of them...)
She logged into my HR system, and decided to scroll through my PAY SLIPS and check that I was 'bringing home less money than everyone else' for herself.

I feel utterly betrayed by this, and my blood boils when I think about it.
I feel like my personal details have been exposed. She can get no end of personal details from those payslips.

If she had just asked me to see them, I'd have probably shown her myself.. I had nothing to hide and wasn't fabricating my situation with the pay..
She was my maid of honour. Someone I confided in and thought of as my best friend and she's completely betrayed me.

I am now torn and don't know what to do. This to me, screams GDPR breach but the problem
is, is that I've got no evidence of her doing it.. only two eye witnesses.

I don't know what to do.

Am I being unreasonable to be completely gutted by this?! I can't seem to let this slide ☹️

If it happened it is certainly a breach and I would imagine a serious disciplinary matter.

Can you be certain it happened, though? The whole environment sounds toxic and you only have the word of these two ex-colleagues.

@WitchesSpelleas that's the thing - I can completely believe that it DID happen, especially looking back and realising her awful behaviour towards me. I feel in some ways I'm quite naive to how she treated me.

I can 100% trust the other two colleagues, but again since the office doesn't have cameras etc I feel like I might find it hard to raise this ☹️

The main issue here is that your friend has betrayed you and was never really a friend. Tell her she’s a bitch and cut her from your life.

In respect to the data breach, yes it is one but nothing will come of it. Even if you prove it the ICO will just note it or issue a fine. I would just leave it.

to you, hope you replace this vile woman with someone nicer and less jealous of you.

@Plmoknijb123 thank you - I feel completely stupid and so naive for ever thinking that there was a genuine and loving friendship there. I can't believe how silly I have been.

I haven't said anything to her in accordance to this information and all that I know (what she's done and said to / about me)

At the start of the previous lockdown, I did tell her that she is no longer to be my MOH. I did it in the nicest way I could, and explained that since we don't talk and I've tried numerous times to reach out to her with no reply, I feel it best that we call it a day.

She read this but alas I didn't ever get a reply from her! X

The IT department would be able to tell if somebody logged onto your computer and given that you were presumably overseas on holiday at the time before covid, it’ll be easy to check

Take comfort in the fact she was obviously consumed with jealousy op...
Ime people you work with are seldom true friends..
My dd has been similarly treated. Luckily the other woman resigned recently..

@AlwaysCheddar thank you - I was wondering if there could possibly be a way for IT to confirm this.
Yes, I was abroad at the time - funnily enough the same holiday I got engaged on, and she was the first to congratulate me about ☹️

@Sunnydaysstillhere thank you - it's just such a funny feeling knowing I put my all into a friendship with her and got this treatment in return!

So sorry your DD has had similar 💐

All you can do is contact your old IT and HR department and tell them that you have become aware of the breach, what she did and what she looked at. They may, or may not choose to follow it up!

And then think abou tit... why is she so consumed with you? Her life must be really small and unfulfilling! Paint on a big smile, fake it until you really make it. And if she is brought up in any conversation "What her? No, we don't talk any more!"

Enjoy what you have. Don't taint it with what was!

Definitely do it. Who knows what other passwords she has!

@CuriousaboutSamphire I'm tempted to raise it with the company and see what they can find. Sadly I've been made aware that she's been made a supervisor of my old department and so I'm not sure if there might be issues surrounding this now, as no doubt she's more immune to complaints then she was as a mere colleague.

Thank you so much for your kind words, I think that I'm going to do just that I've already mentally blocked her out of my life now and don't follow have any more on any social media platforms so I don't have to see what she's up to…

It's just so sad that I thought we were very good close friends.
I didn't take the job of finding my maid of honour lightly and considering I already have two sisters that would be perfect for this role I really thought long and hard about making her such a special part of my day… This is probably what I feel most stupid about😣

I think you also have responsibility to tell your old HR team because you never know what else she’s done and she sounds like a jealous psycho

Try not to feel stupid because you have done nothing wrong and you weren’t to know. You trusted her and you had no reason not to so she is the one who is completely at fault and you should not feel stupid at all

@AlwaysCheddar thank you I think I'm going to raise it with them I just don't want to sound really silly considering I left quite awhile back… I'm just more concerned that they're probably going to tell me to jog on as it was a while ago now or the fact that they probably won't raise the matter with her at all.

I just feel as though I've been completely taken the piss out of basically.

She is horrible and it must have been so hurtful to learn a friend is not a friend.

But at least now you know and can ditch her completely.

I am not sure if complaining to HR will be good for you or not. Personally I would have a clean break from friendship rather than get into a messy work situation. But everyone is different you are well within your rights to complain. Just don't do it if it will cause you more stress/upset.

I don’t think this is a GDPR breach. But it is a massive information security breach by an individual that would be a disciplinary in every company I’ve worked in.
I would write a complaint to HR. But I’m a bit confused as to how you know about this. Apologies if I’ve missed it. Do you have any evidence. Also not a major point as you don’t work there anymore but there is the point of how she got your passwords. It’s your responsibility to keep them save - not share, write them down, lock your computer when you’re not there. Therefore if you still worked there you could also get into trouble.

Is your main concern the Accessing data thing or the fact she was such an awful friend and you didn’t know until now?

I think you probably need to decide if this is something that is worth you investing time and effort into. If you follow up her logging into your personal account will you feel better if there is a consequence, will that Make you feel better? Or will putting time and effort into it make you feel worse, bitter and get stuck on it?

What she did was absolutely wrong and you could contact the company directly to complain and ask for IT to check. I assume she would be fired if it were proved she logged on to someone else’s computer and accessed their personal info.

It might just be worth cutting all contact you might have with her, telling the people contacting you with information about the past you don’t want to hear it and trying to move on and forget about her.

The silver lining to this nastiness is that you found out before your wedding. I don’t doubt the woman is horrible. Are you sure you aren’t also being played a bit by your other former colleagues? Maybe not. Just be careful. It would not hurt to contact HR to put your mind at rest. They can always say no.

How do you know she logged into your payslips?

@CuriousaboutSamphire

All you can do is contact your old IT and HR department and tell them that you have become aware of the breach, what she did and what she looked at. They may, or may not choose to follow it up!

And then think abou tit... why is she so consumed with you? Her life must be really small and unfulfilling! Paint on a big smile, fake it until you really make it. And if she is brought up in any conversation "What her? No, we don't talk any more!"

Enjoy what you have. Don't taint it with what was!

Completely agree with this. She sounds dangerously jealous (not just envious) she has become bitter and sounds quite frankly unhinged and obsessed. That behaviour is not normal!!!! I’m sorry you took so long to find this out. I would contact the company with your allegations/suspicions, dates, times etc whatever you have. Could you ask CAB for legal advice?

Then I’d block her on everything and get your DH to do the same. Live your life and forget about this awful woman. What she has done is awful, put yourself in her shoes, can you imagine how eaten up with jealousy she is to act like that? That’s probably punishment enough! and not healthy for her!

Yes it was a massive data breach and would warrant your not friend being disciplined.

However, it occurred while you were at the company, and you left it four years ago. There is probably no evidence still existing on their systems. Your account would have been disabled and deleted when you left. Along with log in and session information. It is also very hard to prove that you, yourself, did not log in when it was your password used to access your information. And even if you prove that (video evidence, cctv?), it’s even harder to prove you were not negligent at protecting your password from others.

So, since there is not likely to be any evidence, they won’t be able to do anything about your ex friend. They can’t discipline on an incident alleged to have happened over four years ago by an ex-employee. I very much think they will suspect you of sour grapes. A friendship ended and you out to get revenge by interfering with your ex friends employment.

I don’t think that’s the case mind you, just in all my dealings with HR they are very precautionary and usually need evidence of some sort.

@Sally872 thank you - I'm not sure myself what to do for the best.
We don't talk anymore, so maybe just leaving it as it is is best. ☹️

@Idontgiveagriffindamn I found out from two ex colleagues recently.
I didn't ever write down my passwords, was always super compliant with data and didn't give her any known way to access my computer and records.. which is what I find strangest.
We did sit right next to each other... as in the desks were less than 1m apart. It's quite possible that she's seen me type my password into my PC.

There is no way she could access my files without first knowing my passwords, as I was on annual leave I'd have never left my computer unlocked. Xx

@AIMD I just don't know how I feel. I'm so torn.
I can't believe that she's been so cruel in many ways, but the fact she's completely disrespected me and logged into my computer without consent to check on my personal information is really hurtful.

I don't know - maybe I should just cut my losses and move on. It's been a while and I don't miss her like I thought I would before moving offices.

It's a tough one. X

@Mummyoflittledragon absolutely, I'm so glad I've managed to cut her out before my wedding Day. She in no way shape or form deserves to be any part of my special day. Xx