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Original poster

Is this year the worst year of your life?

744 replies

AbsentmindedWoman · 03/11/2020 21:17

It's a shit year, I think virtually everyone would agree. But is it the worst you have lived through?

I'm bored, frustrated, and because I am chronically ill and depend heavily on access to specialist doctors for time-sensitive treatments, have a constant level of background anxiety in case SHTF and my doctors are forced to cancel. However, for me it's not the worst period of my life to date.

What about you? I'm interested in different perspectives on this, as we all are coming to the situation from very different places.

OP posts:
ParkheadParadise · 21/11/2020 20:59

No, not even close.

UniversalHadIt · 21/11/2020 21:00

No. Not at all.

2017/18. Postnatal anxiety and OCD so severe I was almost suicidal.

Partner left me with a 6 month old baby.

Family took me in “don’t even think about leaving for at LEAST a year” then asked me to leave 3 months later because “having a baby in the house is too much” (actually DMs partner was the issue but never mind).

Baby had bronchiolitis and we were in and out of A&E I would say at least once a month for 9 months.

I could go on.

This year has been hard, but it’s been nothing like that. And I’ve been lucky to stay mentally well throughout.

liani · 21/11/2020 21:00

No. It has (selfishly) been one of my best ones. However, I feel terrible for all of those who have been badly affected. Especially those who have lost their lives and lost loved ones. It's awful.

midnightstar66 · 21/11/2020 21:01

Not at all. We've made the best of it to be honest and had a great time. I left my abusive ex late in 2013 and the year following that was utterly traumatic with another 2 years in family court living in fear, battling with cms etc. Now we are finally settled and I can't imagine it ever being worse. I certainly hope not!

FudgeBrownie2019 · 21/11/2020 21:03

God no, I grew up in foster care for my first ten years. This year hasn't been one tenth as shite as any of the first ten years of my life.

iftherewereahorseyinthehouse · 21/11/2020 21:03

No. 2002-2003 was horrendous. And 2004-2005. It's been gradually uphill since then. Don't get me wrong, this has been a shit year but only from the perspective of worrying about my family being ill and never going out anywhere. Overall I'm still happy with where my life is.

Hm2020 · 21/11/2020 21:03

Last year was one of the worst years of my life So this years been odd but it’s amazingly soo much better then lAst year i can’t even complain if a bit different!

JiltedJohnsJulie · 21/11/2020 21:04

Not for me, think the year I near died after having the flu and developing complications or the year my DF died definitely are worse than this. We have enough money to pay the bills and eat and we're all fairly healthy Smile

mamaduckbone · 21/11/2020 21:05

No way. All my loved ones are still alive and well, I still have my job, my marriage and my home. It's been boring and frustrating but on a personal level not the worst by miles.

KatherineJaneway · 21/11/2020 21:06

So far? No.

Been through far worse years.

HerFlowersToLove · 21/11/2020 21:09

No, not remotely. I've had much worse years than this. Years defined by death and domestic violence.

We've all had covid, it's been really debilitating, bit we've survived. And I'm very grateful for that.

Strangedayindeed · 21/11/2020 21:10

No it’s not.

user676432 · 21/11/2020 21:30

Yeah been a tough year for me, diagnosed with cancer just as the country was going into lockdown. Went from been healthy to feeling so vulnerable and scared about catching COVID.
I keep telling myself I would of coped so much better with my diagnosis if COVID wasn’t around but I guess I will never know.

itsgettingcoldoutside · 21/11/2020 21:40

It's been a shitty couple of years.
But I am thankful I still have my job, despite being off for a serious illness last year and having to shield this year.
They know I am committed when I am there, so I hope I won't lose it if I have to keep shielding.

ItsAlwaysSunnyOnMN · 21/11/2020 21:41

No far from it

SchrodingersKitty · 21/11/2020 21:42

Yes.

I had covid (probably) starting in late Feb / early March. I was still ill when DH fainted, concussed himself and broke his leg. While in hospital he finally got clarity on the brain lesions we had been waiting for a clear diagnosis of since last August: central nervous system lymphoma, with no chance of treatment. Without covid we might have gone for one last bout of chemo, but the doctors held out no hope of it curing him, only on a few more weeks at most. He had to shield, so we settled down for the spring and summer in our house and garden. He had some good months, but his condition became increasingly harrowing and caring for him and living with it day to day was the hardest thing I have ever done. I am still not over the shock and exhaustion. He died in September.

Grief is nothing like I had imagined. I'm coping in many ways, and fairly calm, but very vague and disconnected. It is very hard for DS (21) too, but he has taken the year off uni and we are supporting each other and just getting through it. My sadness at him losing his father so young is one of the hardest things.

And then my employer announced another round of voluntary redundancies with the threat of enforced redundancies if they did not secure enough savings. After much thought I have taken the severance. I am 56, and with savings and my widow's pension I will be ok until I take most of my pension at 60.

In the context of all this I'm just fine with the lockdowns: it has just added to the profound sense of unreality.

Yoffel · 21/11/2020 21:42

No, not even close.

MrsExpo · 21/11/2020 21:49

No, not my worst year at all. Ok, I’m a bit bored, but I can live with that.

My worst year was the one where DH1 went off with his OW leaving me emotionally and financially ruined and then promptly started a family with her having told me he never wanted kids ....

I’m well over it now and have moved on, but having to stay home to stay safe and well is nothing by comparison.

Youseethethingis · 21/11/2020 21:53

Yes. DS2 was stillborn, I nearly died, DH and I both made redundant the week after the funeral.
Oh and COVID has been a huge pain in the arse too.

HotPatootiebootie · 21/11/2020 21:54

This year has been far from the worst in my life. We've been very lucky that nothing much has changed for us. My OH was on furlough, still is part time but the bills are covered with a bit left over so that's great.

My circle was already very small and I spent most time with my sister and her two kids. They both have additional needs and I'm trained to deliver therapy and offer respite care so I've still seen them all the way through as she bubbled with us.

We've been able to get quite a lot of house jobs done as we had for holidays cancelled and refunded.

This year we got in the property ladder. Find out we are going to be grand parents for the first time. My nephew started speaking actual words at 5 years old. I've become so much more appreciative of the small things and how lucky I am.

Sure it's occasionally been scary and I've had a as few sleepless nights and all our mental health has been a bit up and down. But compared to what I have been through in the past- childhood sexual abuse, domestic violence, drug addiction, rape, suicide ideation, being bipolar, getting Umpteen Auto immune diseases and being very ill ..... this has been far easier to deal with . But I'm aware that could change. That's why I am more grateful for what I have and an better able to appreciate it.

saggybaps · 21/11/2020 22:10

This year is massively shit. But I’m alive, healthy-ish and happy-ish.

Bar far the worse year I ever had was 2017, finding out my husband was having an affair whilst I was working my socks off, then having a nervous breakdown... yup, that was def worse.

2020 will pass and we’ll get over it quickly, 3 years later, I’m still recovering from my breakdown.

Doidontimmm · 21/11/2020 22:13

I’ve had one of the best years of my life, but I feel bad saying that as it’s affected so many people negatively

Newuser991 · 21/11/2020 22:15

Nope. Not at all.

A few years ago I was being bullied at work and was very severely depressed

This is a walk in the park

breadwidow · 21/11/2020 22:22

It's def not been great, and often very difficult, but what's more depressing is how bloody quick it's gone. It's been so dull and samey and when that happens life passes by in a flash. I feel like life is stuck in a rut, mainly due to covid but also other stuff (eg I should change job as been doing the same thing for a while but can't find the motivation). I'd say emotionally I've had worse years but they were all more interesting than this one.

Scarby9 · 21/11/2020 22:22

@SchrodingersKitty What a truly terrible time you have had. I am so sorry. Take care of yourself.
This has probably been the worst year of my life overall, and probably would have been even without the pandemic to be fair. Worries over my parents would have happened anyway, and some parts of the coronavirus response have made that better (fewer demands on them) and some much worse (not being able to go in their house).
I have had much worse shorter periods in my life, but other years have also had highs as well - this year has been a bit lacking in highs, although I did have a good week away from home in August.