I’ve got this old sofa, charities aren’t collecting, no one will buy it so I’d like to donate it to someone in need,

[Nosleeptilteenagers]

AIBU to be fed up of the amount of people attempting to get rid of their old stuff by virtue signalling on social media?

My fbk is full of it. Literally every other post on my local pages. I get people want to do good things but if you’ve got some baby stuff to donate then googling local baby bank is probably the best option. No one would tell you what a lovely human being you were then. Or put it on marketplace for free, people will want it. How do you judge who is “in need?” you can’t. You just want rid of it and to get some kudos.

Plus it coincides with a local lockdown and charity shops being closed and not collecting!

@Bearnecessity

AHintOf....you really need to have a word with yourself.....

Well at least tag me and tell me the word!

Hope you feel better, have a lovely evening xx

I've seen a puzzle advertised on mine today with pieces missing that "would do someone a good turn" 😖

AHintOf.....you seem confused I am very well and I am indeed having a cracking evening.

“Corner sofa, would love it to go to someone in need 😇 will need cleaning as I have young kids and dogs. Needs collecting today as new sofa coming”.
It was filthy.

I'm starting to wonder, actually, if people aren't specifically targeting people 'in need' only because of virtue signalling (although there probably is a big element of that as well), but rather because they think they'll be desperate and take any old crap off their hands, to save them a trip to the tip.

Whereas they know that somebody never claiming to be in need, but keen to help keep unwanted but decent items in circulation and out of landfill until they really are completely useless to anybody, will turn up, see their filthy, wrecked old tip-fodder and refuse to take it off their hands.

@IncludeWomenInTheSequel

Somebody on my Facebook is selling an 80s style ghetto blaster with a cassette deck that's broken. Selling. Not giving away, actually looking for money for it.

Just put it in the damn bin!

If it's a decent brand, particularly Sony or it has a particular style then someone will pay. There are people who restore retro audio and would either repair this ghetto blaster or break it down for parts. Props departments and window dressers also like them.

There's a lot of money in muck!

I am a £1 seller myself. When I've got a backlog of items that haven't shifted via my usual channel, I'm quite happy to let them go for a quid. It's slightly more than I paid so I've not lost anything, frees up space at home, frees up cash for more stock and someone gets a clean item for peanuts. You'd have to call at mine to get it or meet me outside the pub at the top of my street though, I'm not a bloody charity!

Somebody on my Facebook is selling an 80s style ghetto blaster with a cassette deck that's broken. Selling. Not giving away, actually looking for money for it.

Just put it in the damn bin!

Many of these are collectors items though. They were built to much better specification than most of the cheap tat that came after. They might not have Bluetooth etc but they often had much better preamps/speakers etc.

All a bit sanctimonious tbh

I used to work in commercial recycling and sometimes had to drive a dustcart that was basically a bigger version of what the council use when I was collecting bulk cardboard from factories etc. The amount of times I'd park up for a coffee between jobs and come back to find some nobheads trying to chuck a sofa in the back (despite clearly not being a council truck). It was my responsibility to then get said item out the back otherwise I'd have to tip tons upon tons of recyclables into landfill due to the load now being 'contaminated'.

I'm increasingly of the view that "people in need" don't really need stuff. Stuff is cheap. Stuff is clutter, and difficult to move. "People in need" ACTUALLY need affordable rent, stable tenancies and fresh produce.

So, there's that.

^ appreciate that that's sanctimonious too. But oh well, this is a bitchy thread anyway so I'm all in.

We moved countries so gave away most of our stuff on Freecycle (our sofa did not have a fire certificate due to age but the other big stuff went to charities) who would have guessed we should have stated a 4 seater sofa would need a large car/van to take it common sense would have stated this I suppose, nor did we deliver the free stuff we were giving away another question we were asked!

But of course in moving countries with a toddler (he is now a teenager) due to a job offer we thought instead of trying to get rid of everything fast we would sit around and conspire a big saga about how wonderful we are to give it away as this is what people do on here always come of with the big long Coronation Street storyline instead of just thinking maybe there was not conspiracy behind it all.

Maybe people crouch down behind their bins and jump out and tell random people walking past 'psst guess what we are giving away'

We have a free cycle site in Leeds. In the last two weeks I've freecycled a bunk bed, IKEA shelves, a sofa. Everyone has been happy to have the items.

I'm not getting rid of the stuff to feel charitable. I'm getting rid so I can paint my spare room. Not sure why they wouldn't use a free cycle site. It's far easier.

If you don't want to view it then block them. Simples.

I am part of the FB admin team of a Covid Mutual aid group. Back in Lockdown 1, we had a post offering a donation of PPE related stuff that was in demand at the time. Dutifully and gratefully accepted and offered to pick up. The donator then asked for specific details as to who would be receiving this largesse and requesting direct input into the choice of recipient to make sure it was a worthy home.....

I'm increasingly of the view that "people in need" don't really need stuff. Stuff is cheap. Stuff is clutter, and difficult to move. "People in need" ACTUALLY need affordable rent, stable tenancies and fresh produce.

Spot on.

There is plenty of cheap stuff available in good condition. No-one 'needs' to go to the effort of borrowing a van to collect your dirty old sofa.

The thing I find most weird about this style of post is the idea that the poster's group of Facebook friends includes many, many 'people in need', or people who know and will instantly communicate the offer to them, one of whom must at this moment need a sofa. It's all just wishful thinking isn't it.

@myusernamewastakenbyme

Im always surprised at people selling stuff on fb for £1....why in gods name would you bother...all the messaging...arranging a time....waiting in for someone to turn up...for a bloody £1....just put it in your wheelie bin.

I tried giving stuff away for free no one turned up for it despite being "desperate" so I sold it

we've given up putting things up for free and then having loads of timewasters faff around.

Now we put eveything on gumtree for £5, and if it isn't too much hassle will deliver it within 5 miles.
That way it is out of the house at our convenience, the £5 covers the fuel, and the item has gone.
If they collect it, we tell them to not bother witht he £5.

For soem reaosn, even though it is only a fiver, that cuts out all the time wasters

Have you actually tried donating to a baby bank or woman’s shelter? No one calls you back or tells you what to do or at least they didn’t here - it’s utterly ridiculous.

I eventually put something on Freecycle and a charity contacted me and I gave it all away to them.

Literally sacks of stuff all freshly washed and in good condition.

I don’t care if people think I’m virtue signalling - I just want stuff to go to someone who might want or need it.

You're missing the OP's point Merryoldgoat. Nobody thinks the act of giving stuff away is bad in any way.

They do think that posting on social media about how you'd like to give something to 'someone in need', without taking any sensible steps towards achieving this (like using Freecycle, listing it for free on Fb selling pages, Gumtree etc) is empty virtue signalling.

I do take issue with your point about women's shelters etc though. Shelters and charities are there to serve the interests of their user group. If they need particular items they will ask for them, or will already have efficient supply chains in place. They do not exist to serve the interests of people who wish to gain a feeling of satisfaction from giving things to them, that are of no real or immediate use to the charity. Remember that storage space is expensive - possibly more so than the value of the stuff that can be stored in it.

I saw a similar thing on my local Facebook the other day - a man had put up a photo of bags of Tesco shopping asking where the nearest food bank donation place was as he was just an ordinary bloke doing his bit, etc. All the comments were along the lines of... Erm, you would have walked straight past it on your way out of Tesco. Failing that, he could probably have googled it and found out without uploading a photo and writing a paragraph on Facebook about what he had done. But then no-one else would have known about it would they.

Yanbu not so much the giving away for free. but the filth of some of the items it is an insult to people in need I wouldn't pass on something fit for the bin.
I give away a lot, always privately mainly to neighbours sometimes gumtree.

We keep hearing about how there’s loads of families that can’t afford to boil a pot of porridge or potatoes for their children.

Yet it is genuinely difficult to give away free cots/prams/clothes/books/toys/old electronics online.

Is it because there’s so much used ‘stuff’ sloshing around that people in need don’t even need to use the websites?

@lottiegarbanzo

You're missing the OP's point Merryoldgoat. Nobody thinks the act of giving stuff away is bad in any way.

They do think that posting on social media about how you'd like to give something to 'someone in need', without taking any sensible steps towards achieving this (like using Freecycle, listing it for free on Fb selling pages, Gumtree etc) is empty virtue signalling.

I do take issue with your point about women's shelters etc though. Shelters and charities are there to serve the interests of their user group. If they need particular items they will ask for them, or will already have efficient supply chains in place. They do not exist to serve the interests of people who wish to gain a feeling of satisfaction from giving things to them, that are of no real or immediate use to the charity. Remember that storage space is expensive - possibly more so than the value of the stuff that can be stored in it.

An example: there was a campaign on my local social media asking for donations of baby clothes and toys for local women’s refuges. Gave a contact email.

I emailed twice and got no response. Called, left a voicemail. Nothing. Called again and was told someone would call me back to arrange a drop off. Nothing.

And it’s not about self-satisfaction - it’s about minimising waste when there are excellent quality items that would otherwise go to landfill. Or it is in my case.

Merryoldgoat Sometimes charity appeals are more successful than expected. The (often tiny) staff and volunteers running it are overwhelmed. That's good news, for the charity, not something to complain about.

Sure, it would be better for their continuing donor relationships if they communicated that they'd received enough now, thanks. But sometimes they're taken by surprise, or are a small volunteer-led oranisation with no professional marketing or communications expertise that hadn't thought through how to manage the response. (And oh how people like to complain when charities spend money on 'admin' and 'overheads', like paying marketeers and communications staff to run things professionally).

If your aim is to save things from landfill, you did the right thing with Freecycle (likewise Facebook, Gumtree etc) - and it worked. So that's another good news story.

@Noitjustwontdo

best is ‘just needs a clean’ - well clean it then!

Totally agree! Hate seeing this, it’s so lazy.

Like a nice skirt I saw on ebay which had a huge gash in the fabric. The listing said: it has a rip but it hardly shows when it's on, so it would be easy to sew up. Er.... no. That's not even logical.

So many things for sale which would apparently be easy to fix or clean & would then be absolutely perfect - so why didn't the seller do it?