Leaving because not allowed to wfh

[bctf123]

background- i worked really well from home during lockdown and replying to emails immediately, always sat at my desk etc
as soon as i had made a few errors in my work, i was called back in on the pretext of needing an office environment to work well(around September)
i am the only one called in along with a young apprentice who needs to be on site. i am a bit of a pushover and lowest in the office chain and feel ive been singled out despite my contribution and role.
the manager has been really resistant to me wfh, including in the current lockdown and even on a part time basis, which i dont understand and which i dont want to argue as its a bit of a dog eat dog type of environment.

i am now thinking of leaving as i dont feel treated like an adult at all. the way im being treated feels petty and humiliating.
my motivation has fizzled out since being back in the office and i spend a lot of time watching tv instead of being productive.

aibu to want to leave? they have said they want me to stay but it feels like im being pushed by being singled out as if i need supervision

Dear OP, if you ever want to feel supported and better about your situation, don't come on Mumsnet quite frankly. The bitterness, judgment and lack of support never fails to astound me.
Many of us have been in a position where we are massively struggling with motivation at work and it sounds like you may benefit from a good honest chat with the manager. You could try asking exactly what you need to do to deliver what they want, specifically. Can you turn this into a challenge to prove yourself and your worth and in turn feel better about yourself and treated less like a child - a horrible feeling for you. If this comes to no avail and you just aren't feeling it then tlmaybe it's the time to go find something you really enjoy and feel motivated to do. Not the easiest at this moment in time but maybe this field of work just isn't for you. I was like you were years ago when in a sector I really disliked and didn't feel was the right fit for me.

This sounds like constructive dismissal, to me. If you cannot sit down with your manager and find out what exactly they want from you, and have clearly defined job goals, etc, and then be able to work out exactly where you are not performing to expectations, then you must leave, but in your resignation state clearly that you feel you have been treated unfairly and that you have no alternative but to leave.

I think they do want you out, life is too short, secure another job then leave.

@jillybeanclevertips

This sounds like constructive dismissal, to me. If you cannot sit down with your manager and find out what exactly they want from you, and have clearly defined job goals, etc, and then be able to work out exactly where you are not performing to expectations, then you must leave, but in your resignation state clearly that you feel you have been treated unfairly and that you have no alternative but to leave.

I suspect op has rather less than two years' service so has limited employment rights. She admits she is in the lowest level job, apart from an apprentice, and is probably easily replaceable.

OP, I get it. I've worked in toxic environments where conflict, shouting and hierarchy was really common.

Some people see nothing wrong with it and thrive on it. I didn't. And simply put, it was much easier for me to get out than to try and change the status quo.

You should be respected, valued and treated like an equal at work. It will be affecting your self esteem so please look for something else.

Don't listen to posters criticising you. We all have rubbish days at work. And we all make mistakes. How else do we learn?!

You sound genuine, helpful, thoughtful and like a good team member. Now go and find an employer who values you more!

Public sector jobs are the best bet, good pensions and they don't go bust.
Perhaps you could find something to suit which would make you more motivated, comfortable, and happy about what is being asked of you work-wise.
Yes, some criticisms on here have been hard including mine but I'm sure we wish you well.

We are not walking in your shoes, experiencing your feelings but we can support you verbally and tell you that everyone has a talent, put on your big-girl pants and tell yourself that you can do better, if not in your present job then in another more suited to your abilities.
I really wish you all the best. We spend so much of our lives at work that it's imperative to find a job that makes you look forward to getting stuck in whether WFH or in the office.
Take care...onward and upward...👍💐

@IcedPurple

Sorry that I haven't read everything, but you have a right to request flexible working, and there are limited reasons under the law which your company can use to turn down a request.

You have the right to request flexible working, but the employer is under no obligation to grant that request.

No, but they have to have a valid business reason for turning it down. I imagine that they will say working from home has affected quality and performance, but it doesn't sound from OP as if that is actually the case.

It sounds toxic OP.

Make every effort to do a good job while you are there.

Ask again about wfh given new lock down

Search for a new job and leave as soon as you find a suitable one

Pre Covid hardly anyone did their jobs from home in the grand scheme of work so you’ll have to get out of that mindset that you have any right to do so as you don’t. Simply put, bosses say jump and workers ask how high. Accept that and life’s easier. So adjust your attitude frankly.
Secondly turn the darn tv off! It Really doesn’t look good. You don’t need to give them excuses. Get a radio.
By all means look for a new job as you’re obviously resentful here but do it on your legitimate lunch break or evenings. Your loss of productivity definitely will be noticed and you’re definitely not doing yourself any favours. What would a reference about you look like?
If you get sacked because you’re clearly telling them you’re unhappy and then not working for them properly, then just remember that you get absolutely no state help for 6 months. Can you pay all your bills on savings? Remember that lots of people have lost their jobs already and it’s a bun fight for positions so getting a new job won’t be simple. Until then smile, give yourself a talking to, stop moaning, start working hard and plan to leave. No one owes you any favours in life

Some people on here are extremely critical and out of touch with humanity. Don’t be brainwashed and gaslighted into a delusional oppressive narrative.

OP your feelings are valid and there are a lot of support also, on here from genuine people with empathy and compassion. You are in a toxic working environment by the sound of it all. Seniority and cliques make the work place a battlefield or jungle laced with abusive supervision: yelling, belittling, devaluation, gaslight, always bring up your fails and taking credit for your contribution. People term this as professionalism. These stuff and more awfulness happen in the workplace; public sector, local council, NHS and within private sector enterprises. I can say more but I will leave it there for this discourse.

OP, you can jump from the pot into the firer. Learning how to manage your behaviour within a toxic environment can help you to cope. You need to evaluate all of your options and take a decision that will make YOU happy. You happiness is what matters at the end of the day.

Also think you saying that any time you’re not working = theft of time and money. No one can be productive for every minute of every day. What about loo breaks? Are they theft too?

Loos breaks are obviously fine but I work for the public sector and we are expected to be productive for every minute of the time we are paid for, which given that it is the public purse paying us and the public who wait longer if we skive, seems perfectly fine. There are breaks in the working day and outside of those it is perfectly possible to keep up the pace of work.

To be fair, the TV thing depends heavily on what the job is. I once worked in a lab where I was more or less just testing battery voltages for 8 hours a day - I could have learned quantum physics on the clock and still had enough brain power left over to do that job!