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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

. . . To be dreading "bonfire night"

127 replies

AllesAusLiebe · 29/10/2020 17:08

Hi everyone,

So, I'll start by saying that I'm not originally from the UK and I don't want to criticise the customs and traditions here.

I've got a 2 year old and a cat and every single year, I dread this holiday.

The worst thing about it for me is that it isn't just one night. My cat has been completely losing his shit since last weekend because of people setting off fireworks. I've tried creating a little corner of the living room for him and have a Feliway plug in, but the poor little guy is terrified.

Then, there's my son. I thought that due to coronavirus, this year would be a more scaled back affair, but I'm dreading next Thursday as I know that the lack of outdoor displays will mean that more people will be setting fireworks off in their gardens. He sleeps well, but lightly. I have visions of him being woken up multiple times during the next week. He's generally scared of loud noise, and he's too young for me to explain to him what's going on.

So, if you've got small kids and/or pets, what do you do? Does anyone else absolutely hate this, or do I need to stop being such a spoilsport and embrace it?

OP posts:
PhilSwagielka · 29/10/2020 23:47

I don’t mind Bonfire Night itself. The cat hates it, so I’ll give him treats and put Spotify on. What I do mind is knobheads in my area letting fireworks off weeks in advance. Even in the day when you can’t see them.

Nandocushion · 30/10/2020 00:04

A friend is a senior nurse in A&E, and he says they dread this time of year because of the horrific injuries suffered by people at home fireworks parties. A surgeon was on TV saying that the injuries they have to deal with every year are as bad as those suffered by soldiers in war. Even sparklers can cause dreadful injuries apparently. Already this year my friend has treated two kids who've had fingers blown off and a woman who lost an eye.

Yes, the teenage morons who live down the road from me decided to have a 4th of July party (during lockdown) and at 1am were out on the road shooting Roman candle fireworks at each other and popping others in back pockets and lighting them. It was a relief they'd only be maiming each other.

commandatori · 30/10/2020 00:24

My cat hates it, he’s a sensitive boy anyway but he runs and hides in the shoe rack 😢 we pop him in the bedroom with the lights down low and get him all comfy then we put a YouTube for cats video on the laptop. He likes one called winter birds. Then we just sit in there with him and pet him. We don’t have kids as you can probably tell Grin

SuperCaliFragalistic · 30/10/2020 05:14

My kids have always enjoyed fireworks, even when they were really little. No harm in a few organised displays this time of year. My rabbits are fine as long as I bring them indoors and close the curtains. No need for an outright ban.

MysweetAudrina · 30/10/2020 05:50

They are illegal here in ROI. Hasn't stopped them going off every night since September. Dog loses his mind everytime. Cats couldn't give a fuck.

Elsewyre · 30/10/2020 05:57

"He's generally scared of loud noise, and he's too young for me to explain to him what's going on."

Just show him the bright lights and pretty colours in the sky?
Seems most people find that part more enjoyable than the noise with no sight

BullBailey · 30/10/2020 06:32

Have a dog who is the same because a firework exploded outside our house (clearly gone wrong). WeVe tried everything, nothing will soothe her. It’s horrific to watch. I used to love bonfire night but I hate fireworks now. Think of all the pets, livestock and wild animals that suffer. All the hedgehogs that get burnt because people don’t check their bonfires and all the rubbish that fireworks produce.

Fireworks should be banned at best, but used for public displays at worst.

Don’t care if that makes me a ‘spoilsport’, I’d rather my dog didn’t go through weeks of hell every year than people enjoyed a few pretty lights in the sky.

DDiva · 30/10/2020 08:16

People choose different things to add enjoyment to their life.

I love bonfire season and its massive here in Sussex from Sep-Nov. I prefer organised displays and believe its a much safer option but for obvious reasons that's not possible this year.

Some people dont like fireworks, some people dont like dogs and cats. We just have to find a way to get on with things.

Ohtherewearethen · 30/10/2020 08:24

@DDiva - but how do you suggest that people just get on with things? People who don't like dogs and cats can opt out of having them. People, wildlife and pets can't opt out of hearing unnecessarily loud horrendous bangs

QueenPaws · 30/10/2020 08:29

I hate them. Never did until someone threw one into my open window two years ago and it landed next to me then exploded
I guess people who like them haven't experienced that, not only was it terrifying, it was expensive, inconvenient and ruined my living room
A woman with a baby also had one thrown in her car when she was in it with the baby

MrTumblesSpottyHag · 30/10/2020 08:32

Yanbu, I hate them!
So loud and what a waste of money- might as well set fire to £50 notes and throw them in the sky.

Yes I am a miserable bastard 😂

Bubbletrouble43 · 30/10/2020 08:34

My dog isn't too phased by fireworks, when I first got him it was early October and a friend gave me a cd of firework noises they had used with their dog who also ended up not being bothered. As per their advice I played the cd all day every day in the house for the couple weeks leading up to firework season starting on very low volume increasing the volume each day, and as I say, he's not too bothered by them at all. No idea where you can get this cd but maybe this will help some people with dogs or cats that are scared stiff. It definitely worked for us.

DDiva · 30/10/2020 08:38

[quote Ohtherewearethen]@DDiva - but how do you suggest that people just get on with things? People who don't like dogs and cats can opt out of having them. People, wildlife and pets can't opt out of hearing unnecessarily loud horrendous bangs[/quote]
There are measures white noise etc that can help.

I have to put up with many cats in my garden and their poo. Also dogs around our local park and nature reserve and poo not picked up by their owners. I'm not calling for a cull on all cats and dogs. I'm just thankful for responsible owners and take it as part of living in a community ..

DDiva · 30/10/2020 08:41

@QueenPaws

I hate them. Never did until someone threw one into my open window two years ago and it landed next to me then exploded I guess people who like them haven't experienced that, not only was it terrifying, it was expensive, inconvenient and ruined my living room A woman with a baby also had one thrown in her car when she was in it with the baby
That sounds horrific you poor thing.

Unfortunately those with that mentality will probably get hold of them illegal or not and cause destruction in whatever way they can.

LucilleBluth · 30/10/2020 08:42

I love bonfire night and I reserve the right to let fireworks off in my garden on the 5th November. People shouldn’t be letting them off late at night and all month though.

I have three DCs and three dogs, one of my dogs likes to sit around the fire pit and watch the fireworks. The other two just bark through the window.

QueenPaws · 30/10/2020 08:49

@DDiva 2am last night they were setting them off. I flinch now every time and can't have my windows open for a good month in case one gets thrown in. Still think they should be heavily regulated and you shouldn't be able to buy them at all unless it's for an event (proof required/ID etc)

Doodiesbear · 30/10/2020 08:52

I have to sedate one of my dogs, she's manic, and this year is going to be worse than other years.
I usually turn the TV up too. The other ones deaf so she doesn't bother at all.
If it were just a few nights that were predictable then that's manageable but my dogs going to be out of it from Thurs to Mon I would imagine because they'll at least go on that long.
And as for the dementia patients I work with...... Some don't have the capacity to understand the noise going off, it's great fun when some twat sets some off late into the night and you suddenly have a unit full of bewildered and frightened people. And then another lot go off just as you've reassured and they've forgotten, they don't have the capacity to remember this happened 5 minutes ago or what it is.
And I really don't care if people think I'm miserable or a killjoy - why the fuck would I have a positive view of something that's causing misery to others right in front of me in the name of 'fun'?

EvilPea · 30/10/2020 08:56

I am another white noise advocate.

what we need at a time when our hospitals are very busy. Is a load of numptys setting fire to things in their garden.

Angel2702 · 30/10/2020 09:03

I love fireworks. I certainly prefer it to the summer where we can’t sleep for weeks on end due to noisy parties that go on all night. A few nights of fireworks in the early evening is far more preferable.

DDiva · 30/10/2020 09:04

[quote QueenPaws]@DDiva 2am last night they were setting them off. I flinch now every time and can't have my windows open for a good month in case one gets thrown in. Still think they should be heavily regulated and you shouldn't be able to buy them at all unless it's for an event (proof required/ID etc) [/quote]
And if they weren't setting off fireworks my guess would be they would be doing something else equally as anti social.

We have issues with motorbikes at night but we can't ban everyone from having motorbikes.

I in fact agree with tighter controls but even then i think some idiots will still get hold of them.

Ohtherewearethen · 30/10/2020 09:04

@DDiva - do you honestly think that plating white noise drowns out the ridiculously loud fireworks?
What about all the wildlife that die of fright every year because of them? How do they access this magic white noise?

Ohtherewearethen · 30/10/2020 09:05

*playing

movingonup20 · 30/10/2020 09:09

You need to embrace it with your son, the cat - I suggest a cosy place to hide and music on. My dog has developed a fear (in older age was fine young) and last year we put on Tchaikovsky, loud, on repeat on the night my neighbours had them. Kids tend to love fireworks unless their parents pass on their fear.

Most countries have fireworks so at least they are early evening here misty!

movingonup20 · 30/10/2020 09:13

@Poppyismyfavourite

There was an Indian festival earlier in October, not sure of the date but it marks part of Diwali. Lots of fireworks last weekend and most my neighbours are Indian decent

DDiva · 30/10/2020 09:20

[quote Ohtherewearethen]@DDiva - do you honestly think that plating white noise drowns out the ridiculously loud fireworks?
What about all the wildlife that die of fright every year because of them? How do they access this magic white noise?[/quote]
It can certainly help alot of animals. Do you have details of the wildlife that are affected ? In Sussex there are dozens of massive fireworks displays in local villages. Local wildlife groups have not publicised this causingany issues to the local wildlife.

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