Teenager believes trick or treat will happen

[nicegirl73]

I have told them straight from the start that it won’t happen. They are 14,12 and 10.
My 14 year old just got angry with me now saying I dont know that it won’t.
I just don’t want them to be disappointed but am I unreasonable trying to manage their expectations here?
Will it still happen in some places? Or Should I just let her find it since she clearly doesn’t trust me. Help!!! Otherwise sensible teen

reginaphalangeeee

No, we’re not “miserable”. We’re concerned for our safety and know that as women we are (unfortunately) vulnerable. I’ll cheerfully chat to gangs of toddlers and small children. Teenagers will have to go somewhere else.

Exactly @StitchInTimeSavesNine it’s been making me laugh, at least. 😆

Seriously no one over the age of 11 does T&T around my area.

I find the teenagers round here who trick or treat go to far with their costumes, really scary masks, fake wounds etc and it terrified my 3 small children last year to the point we had to stop opening the door to anyone because they were so afraid, which was a real shame as they had been enjoying opening the door to the younger children and handing out sweets. Also the teenagers round here dont start trick or treating until after 7.30 which is to late for us as mine are going to bed.

I dont have a problem with a 14yr old going with younger siblings but i wouldnt open the door to a group of them.

We usually go back to the US for Halloween week and we love the celebration. We go to some of the multitude of events on offer at the parks and have a blast. E.g. Mickeys Not So Scary, Spooktacular or Halloween Horror Nights. We collect bucket loads of candy from the events, eat themed food and drinks and DS has always loved it...we do too.
We didn’t go last year as a relative had a big birthday that week and instead we were stuck in the house answering the door every 30 seconds. Our candy ran out in the first 30 minutes or so and we noticed the same groups of kids returning several times. Fucking awful experience. In the end we just ignored the door. DS has never been door to door trick or treating and he never will, just as I never did as a child either. I loathe it and remembered why we normally would piss off to celebrate elsewhere. YANBU telling your children no. My has never been told yes.

It should be 'we are not doing it'.

@AibuTellMe omg people are so mean. I would always answer and smile extra to the older kids.
@MeredithGreysScalpel ❤️❤️❤️ Yes yes yes

*@Angelina82 and to all the others who think 14 is too old. My 14 year old would still want to go trick or treating if it wasn't for covid. It's nothing to do with being desperate for sweets, she doesn't even like most of the sweets given and gives them to her siblings. It's about the fun of dressing up with her friends and siblings, walking around in the dark and seeing other people's costumes and decorated houses. We have a few streets locally who go all out with decorations and it's fun, even the adults dress up. If teens stick to the rule of knocking only if people have decorated and as long as they are having appropriate fun not actually trying to scare anyone or do any tricks, I don't see why they shouldn't do it. *

I understand all that and I didn’t say that 14 is too old to celebrate Halloween necessarily. I am surprised that a kid that age would kick up such a fuss about it though!

@smilingthroughgrittedteeth

I find the teenagers round here who trick or treat go to far with their costumes, really scary masks, fake wounds etc and it terrified my 3 small children last year to the point we had to stop opening the door to anyone because they were so afraid, which was a real shame as they had been enjoying opening the door to the younger children and handing out sweets. Also the teenagers round here dont start trick or treating until after 7.30 which is to late for us as mine are going to bed.

I dont have a problem with a 14yr old going with younger siblings but i wouldnt open the door to a group of them.

So take your pumpkin in when your kids go to bed and ignore anyone who knocks after that.

[quote nicegirl73]@AibuTellMe omg people are so mean. I would always answer and smile extra to the older kids.
@MeredithGreysScalpel ❤️❤️❤️ Yes yes yes[/quote]
Why would you smile extra at the older kids? That’s just odd.

in some ways so cute and little still
@nicegirl73 I have to disagree. I’m a secondary teacher. I really enjoy spending time with teenagers - they often have A great sense of humour and their perspective is always worth considering. They are not, however, ‘cute and little still’. They are young adults and should be given the respect of treating them as such - in this case, explaining why a)its a bad idea to go T&T in a pandemic and b) they might frighten older or lone householders.

Think the OP has never lived somewhere where you get groups of tall teenagers, one mask between them, banging on your door and demanding money or whatever you've got, and lobbing dog shit or a firework at you if you say no (or shove it through the letter box if you don't open the door to them).

For years I had to tape the letterbox shut and ensure all the lights were off at the front of the house so it looked like we were out.

I am sure their parents thought they were still cute little babies too..

I live somewhere nice now but I still don't want strangers banging on my door, covid or not.

We block our front gateway with a table that has a bowl of sweets on it and decorations etc and ask that folk take a small handful each and leave some for the next people.

Most years thats worked, although one year some kids with their Dad, just emptied the entire bowl (at the Dads instruction) so theres always someone out there willing to spoil it for everyone.

Teenagers trick or treating is ridiculous imo - you see them a week later in groups by the swings glued to instagram - they can't have it both ways, tort is for children - buy her some treats and stay in - have a party instead.

Poor teens can't win. Make an effort with the outfits and they are deemed too scary for young DCs who perhaps are too young for Halloween if they get scared by the outfits, don't dress up and they are just lazy louts out to demand sweets and money.

I do get that some of the older age group are not doing proper trick or treat, but for those that are I really can't see the problem. When we first moved in and DS was young we used to get groups of teen girls singing as the voting talent shows were quite popular at the time. It was a bit of a pain having to listen to their tortured warblings, but it was also good to see them having a bit of fun. Had I truly resented them and not wanted to hand out the sweeties, I'd have switched off the pumpkin lights and simply not answered the door.

[quote Rotundandhappy]@MJMG2015 you’ve replied to your own NC thread as though you hadn’t posted it. You gave yourself away. 🤭[/quote]
WTAF are you on about?

I have not replied to my own name change as I have not namechanged

FFS

@RishiMcRichface

I'm in T1 and the council have sent a message saying it's not advised.

Did they post it out? Or do they gather a more modern form of communication? Mins are probably still handwriting any notifications

I've actually had a written newsletter thing and the online email version! Not just about Halloween 🎃 but local council news and Covid update.

Impressive. Nothing here from the council, a couple of emails from the MP, basically saying 'aren't I wonderful'. If I could be arsed to reply to the idiot I'd be forced to list the numerous ways in which he is not!!

They aren't too bad round here apart from the annoying pop up cycle lanes in unsuitable areas causing chaos.