Teenager believes trick or treat will happen

[nicegirl73]

I have told them straight from the start that it won’t happen. They are 14,12 and 10.
My 14 year old just got angry with me now saying I dont know that it won’t.
I just don’t want them to be disappointed but am I unreasonable trying to manage their expectations here?
Will it still happen in some places? Or Should I just let her find it since she clearly doesn’t trust me. Help!!! Otherwise sensible teen

My kids stopped at 12, and the odd teenage group that do knock do the bare minimum with costumes so not very keen on them. Fine to dress up and take part by going out with younger siblings or answering the door in costume.
I have no idea what's happening in my area. I live between three schools so we usually get a fair number. And we carve pumpkins and decorate the front (on the day only). I've bought candy just in case.

I didn't let my teens trick or treat after year 7. I said they can have Halloween parties at my house with friends (well not many friends this year!!!), they can give out sweets, but they need to leave the little ones to their fun. Same as I didn't let them hog things for older kids when they were toddlers, same as I don't go to the gym at the same time they do, etc etc. Time and place.

If they had young siblings they were taking, I'd be fine with that. But at 14 and 15 my teens would go with friends and be seen as a gang, and people might be worried.

For 2020 I feel teens need a bit of fun more than ever so I can totally understand a 14 year old being adamant about it. Maybe we need to start a drive through trend. Kids dress up and distance themselves in a big empty retail car park, householders drive along throwing wrapped sweets from the car 🤣

I normally dress up my house, dress up myself (at what other time can you legitimately scare kids! 🤷‍♀️),welcome kids & give out sweets. It’s fun - I did it as a kid as did my DS (now 25). But not this year.
I’m still recovering from COVID & not comfortable, plus we are T1 but I believe we are on the cusp of T2.
Next year though! Next year bring it on! 🦇🍭🍬🧟‍♀️🧛🏻‍♂️

I have no problems with a 14 year old wanting to go T&T.

She’s still a kid!

But no I don’t think a lot of houses will answer the door.

I know we aren’t.

We are doing a Halloween hunt around the house and watching Halloween films

I don't understand why it can't go ahead to be honest. On our road it's only ever a few families (not large groups), usually a couple of small children dressed up accompanied by a parent. Sweets can be left spaced out for them to help themselves. Hand sanitizer can be left out. I would have thought that this is one of the few things that children can do if people are sensible.

To add, it's been agreed on the street what's App Group that only children will visit houses with lit pumpkins left outside, which is what we do anyway.

God, all the miserable bastards are out in force tonight. A 14 year old is still a child. ‘Embarrassed for them’ - what a load of bollocks.

I won’t allow mine to trick or treat this year because of Covid, but if it wasn’t a pandemic, they would be going out because they love it. They like to do their makeup, come up with a costume and are impeccably behaved. So fuck off with your ‘it’s for 4 year olds’.

There's really not going to be a government announcement about whether or not Trick or Treating is allowed to happen!

Regardless of what tier your area is in, parents should be putting their foot down about this. You DO know what the rule on it will be for your household because YOU will make it!!

Can you not just have a family party at home? Seems to be what most people are planning.

At 14 I'm sure your daughter can understand why people don't want kids at their doorstep asking for sweets this year.

Haha, I used to take my two younger sisters trick or treating when I was 14, I’d even get dressed up for it 😂
No embarrassment here 👍🏼

More embarrassing to post a thread and then argue against yourself.

Kids shouldn’t be knocking on doors begging for sweets anyway surely? You spend the rest of the year telling them not to accept sweets from strangers....

I wouldn't be dishing out sweets to a teenager I don't know any teenagers that actually go trick or treating!
Either way, arguing with yourself on mumsnet is a pretty sad way to spend an evening.

14 is too old anyway, there's no way I'm letting my six foot plus teens go trick or treating, they'd scare the living daylights out of small kids if they dressed up. They haven't expressed any interest for years.

My sons autistic and has always hated halloween as he doesn't line crowds/lots of people and hated dressing up due to the fabrics. Now hes 13 he said he wants to go, typical! So I don't think 14 is to old, its lovely. Better than them being sat in a park drinking or smoking. Mine wont be going though.

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If it was not corona and my disabled nearly 6ft teen wanted to go trick or treating for the first time I'd hope some of you would have some compassion

From one parent of an autistic child to another: Please stop using it as justification for doing what you want. No, nobody should feel obliged to give sweets to your teenager if they feel intimated by an adult sized stranger knocking at their door, autistic or not.
It really undermines the struggles of parenting an autistic child and people do far too much.

AibuTellMe

If I was in my house on Halloween and a nearly 6ft person knocked on my door saying trick or treat, I wouldn’t answer. Sorry. That might mean your son missed out and I’m sorry for that.

FWIW I think 14 is fine if they’re actually in costume

But we aren’t doing T&T this year because of Covid, sadly.

Wow a barrel of fun you are. Mines 13 hes got 13 year old friends half his size just because hes tall doesn't mean hes a threat to you.

AibuTellMe

But from inside my house as a lone female I would have absolutely no idea of context. Teenagers, in general, I think are too old for trick or treat and I’d be intimidated. So I wouldn’t answer and that’s my right.

Some people are so miserable. I honestly would not care if a 14 year old came to my door trick or treating. They’re still a child and it’s just some sweets 🙄

I'm in T1 and the council have sent a message saying it's not advised.

Did they post it out? Or do they gather a more modern form of communication? Mins are probably still handwriting any notifications

I've actually had a written newsletter thing and the online email version! Not just about Halloween 🎃 but local council news and Covid update.