To report this teacher to the school (help!!!)

[hellolovely7]

Actually NC because a lot of school mum's know me on here and I feel so awkward about this situation but

My DS is in secondary school, he can be a bit of an idiot but I'm not on here for an incarceration of his behaviour. Today he was spending time in the behaviour centre and one of the teachers in there touched him. Impossible to get out of him what actually happened as he has clammed up about it now but basically AIBU to report this to the school due to covid? Surely teachers should be 2 metres away and definitely not touching the students????

For context and not to be a drip feed, he basically came home and was like "Miss xxxx" hugged me today. I was like, wtf, and he was like nah she didn't really hug me but she did touch me mum so ive probs got covid now. I asked him exactly what happened but he said i was making a fuss and she was just comforting him due to having a strop but he said he was a bit surprised that she touched him and he apparently told her she would give him COVID and then she apologised.

Do you think this is dealt with and it was just an error of judgement from the teacher or do you think I should be making a bigger deal? I am genuinely torn

[KatieGGGG]

Your kid back chats a teacher and you call it banter.

A teacher goes to comfort your child and you want to complain.

I can’t imagine why he thinks it’s acceptable not to give up his phone to a teacher. I mean, he knows you focus on the right issues.

[saraclara]

@MoistMolly

Definitely inappropriate and creepy as fuck

You're kidding me. She touched him to try to calm him down. A hand on the arm is a powerful connection that helps kids/teensmanage their emotions, and it shows empathy.

There's absolutely nothing inappropriate about that, especially in a behaviour unit.

[Hercwasonaroll]

Refusing to handover a phone is massively disruptive. He's got you over a barrel convincing you that his behaviour is a minor issue and the teacher "touching" him is the real issue.

Refusal to handover a phone is outright defiance. Usually the request is made multiple times and ignored before other staff are called and a behaviour unit used.

Get a grip on his behaviour.

[DodgeRainClouds]

I have had kids sat on my lap, hugging me and kissing me. I have also put my arm around distressed children. I work in reception class. It’s impossible not too. I’m sorry but you would be very wrong to report. She did it to comfort him and didn’t even realise she had done it until she had.

[Flupibass]

Quite, rude badly behaved boy.

[Primadonna1]

Get a grip woman - people like are probably the reason teachers leave the profession !

[pollyglot]

FFS - it's people like you who make me so glad I'm no longer in teaching. I worked in boarding schools for many, many years, acting in loco parentis, and comforting children by a quick hug, hand on arm, or even a proper cuddle was part of the job. I even had to tuck them in at bed-time, and give them a good-night hug. As a mum and granny, how could I do anything else when many cried themselves to sleep? You would be amazed also at how many teenage boys just want a mum or mum-substitute who will listen. And BTW, you would be surprised by what kids will confide to teachers whom they trust. I had to continue to deal professionally with some of those parents like you, fortunately, very few, always wanting to make trouble, knowing some pretty personal stuff about them. I know what sort of teacher I want for my GCs, and they are leaving for lack of support, and because they just can't win.

[theThreeofWeevils]

I am surprised that a teacher hugging/patting a secondary school pupil is seen as normal/acceptable behaviour.
But I also suspect this boy is playing tje OP like a salmon.

[embaex]

Wonder what these rude arse posters would be saying if their child got COVID from a teacher.
You weren't being unreasonable to ask. I get it, I would have thought everyone would in these times but apparently they don't.
Ignore these hateful comments, and the ones about your child! Jesus every child misbehaves, EVERY CHILD. Pretty sure we all did at that age even over minor things such as phones!
Honestly shocked at some of these comments.

[LizzieVereker]

@Hercwasonaroll

Refusing to handover a phone is massively disruptive. He's got you over a barrel convincing you that his behaviour is a minor issue and the teacher "touching" him is the real issue.

Refusal to handover a phone is outright defiance. Usually the request is made multiple times and ignored before other staff are called and a behaviour unit used.

Get a grip on his behaviour.

This. Refusing to hand over a phone is highly disruptive and defiant. He’s done a great job in distracting you from the real issue here.

[Smallgoon]

Grow up ffs. Your son was in the behaviour centre. Sorry, but I'm less inclined to believe him.

[dollypops15]

I think its an error of judgement and if my child was distressed I would be glad an adult offered comfort at school

[mineofuselessinformation]

You really have your head in the sand about this.
You need to realise how massively exposed teachers are, and that passing off your son's remark when a teacher was exposing themselves was totally inappropriate.
You need to consider that before you make a complaint, you should address your son's behaviour - at his age he knows the rules of the school, but unless you're going to drip feed and say he has SN, chose to ignore them. That's what put him in the situation, not the teacher's subsequent behaviour.
You need to give your head a shake.

[LizzieVereker]

@embaex

Wonder what these rude arse posters would be saying if their child got COVID from a teacher.
You weren't being unreasonable to ask. I get it, I would have thought everyone would in these times but apparently they don't.
Ignore these hateful comments, and the ones about your child! Jesus every child misbehaves, EVERY CHILD. Pretty sure we all did at that age even over minor things such as phones!
Honestly shocked at some of these comments.

No they don’t. As a secondary school teacher in a state comprehensive school in the most deprived borough in London I can assure you that not all children misbehave. The majority want to learn and behave well. Not handing over a phone is not normal misbehaviour and disrupts the education of others.

[Maskedcrusader]

You should tell your son to behave himself at school and be glad he has teachers that behave like human beings and care about the students in their care.

[PolloDePrimavera]

@noideaatallreally

and this is one of the many reasons why I got out of teaching...... yes, go one report them. Cause them stress. I'm sure your poorly behaved son will learn a lot from this.....

Same.

[Staffy1]

My DS is at a SEN school. The teachers have to touch the children...a lot. I think they are fantastic.

[Laurendelight]

Your son was put in isolation for a burst of anger and nothing more??? Are you sure? Most children do not behave like this and most children are never taken to a behavior room, my guess is the teacher or intervention staff member thought it might calm him down. For your son to turn this around sounds very sneaky. I guess you know your child best. I'd be taking the bloody phone off him for a week.

[lazylinguist]

Fgs. He already changed his story once while he was telling it to you. Who knows what actually happened (if anything). You say he was in the behaviour centre for refusing to hand his phone over, as though we'll all think "Oh well that's nothing". No it isn't. And I wonders why he was asked to hand over his phone in the first place. And now apparently telling the teacher she's giving him Covid is 'banter'. It's his behaviour you should be worrying about, not the teacher's imo.

[crimsonlake]

Totally agree with Noideaatallreally.
I think you should look to your own son's behaviour.......

[Hercwasonaroll]

It's his behaviour you should be worrying about, not the teacher's

Sums it up.

[Caelano]

Perhaps you could sort out your son’s behaviour and he could help you with your use of the English language

[Userzzz]

Ffs. Get a life.

[Lasttraintolondon]

YABU YABU YABU

[lazylinguist]

Wonder what these rude arse posters would be saying if their child got COVID from a teacher.

Well that wouldn't happen, since it's impossible to know who gave it to you, especially for kids who are mixing with hundreds of other kids in school every day.