To want to inflict harm on all of the Mr Men

[StayCloseSpooky]

DS 4 is obsessed with Mr Men books. Absolutely obsessed but it's getting to the point where I want to stab my eyes out just so I don't have to read another bloody one.

Why are they all so bloody smug?
Why is everything 'extraordinarily'?
Why does Mr Happy regularly pop up to be, quite frankly, a bit of a parsimonious prick?
WHY ARE THEY SO LONG?

I can't take it anymore. Please tell me I'm not the only one that wants to drop kick Mr Happy for being so bastarding passive aggressive?

I think I need a gin

. "drop kick Mr Happy" I looked at that.

Perfectly reasonable IMO, no jury would convict you.

Give Mr Uppity a good kicking from me while you're at it, he's a twat!

"lolled" stupid autocorrect.

But they have such cool shoes!

I have to agree on one point - why are the books so bloody long

They're not as bad as the new Thomas & Friends books. The old Thomas books were the bomb. The T&F ones morphed Thomas into a sanctimonious priss. I banned them from the house.

They are long

Ds used to choose Mr Chatterbox on purpose I’m sure

@TerribleLizard we should all be a bit Little Miss Spendid,

Can’t stand them. Made the mistake of buying the box set some 15 years ago. Now working in a school I can’t hide my dislike if one those books is brought to read.
Why so long!

DS went through a Mr Men phase. He knew all the words to the books, so there was no skimming over the long, droning passages. Also, there's about a billion bits of merchandise you can buy, everywhere you go. We visited a castle and they had Mr Men shit which he begged and pleaded for.

There's also the godawful Mr Men show. If you fancy some peace, download the Milkshake app on your smart TV and they can watch all the very loud obnoxious episodes on there.

Oh I’m with you OP. They are horrible to read aloud, so SO tedious. I hated them when mine were little too. You feel obliged to do the Mr Men don’t you? Well guess what? Turns out there’s no such obligation...you can fuck them right off into the sea. I did and my life got better.

We got the full box set and 4yo DS loved them, so DH in his wisdom treated him to the complete set of Little Miss books too, PLUS the Mr Men adventures. 94 of the fuckers in total.

After about 2 months DH had seen the error of his ways, and all the assorted Men and Misses went on a nice holiday to the loft

Mr Tickle is an arsehole who needs to learn some personal boundaries
best thing I’ve read on MN of late 🤣🤣

I do love the mr men show on telly - such a groovy theme tune

I'm not ashamed to say the Thomas and friends went away to the land of not-a-fucking-chance-pal. Life is too short.

I do really relate to Mr Greedy though and I hate that he's fat shamed for loving cream cakes. He's the true hero and one I can relate to.

At least they're short, very few words per page, unlike that flippin,' Tank Engine.

This! I spent so many evenings propping my eyes open over those books, they sent me to sleep much more quickly than did for DS1 and 2. And I could never skip a page, they noticed every bloody time.

DS can't read yet so I do skim read them when I can't be arsed. I'm an appalling mother

Illustrations are fabulous, stories are atrocious and very, very boring.
Those books got lost somewhere.

Yep they are dire! Painful to read and questionable values in some.

I don’t mind them overly but they are a bit long and a bit dull. Some of the Dr Seuss ones are worse. Girls are 6 and 4 now and finally starting to move on to chapter books though

Bloody hell op. Have you hit rock bottom?

Mr Men books are life.

Mr Bump is basically about a man who has severe depression and is a possible suicide risk. He eventually finds "job satisfaction" in walking into apple trees and literally self harming for money.

I think he needs an intervention.

So long winded and badly written! I’ve chucked them all when the kids where not looking. Wish I could do the same for Thomas the tedious tank engine but they love those!

The new ones written by his son are even worse.

What I hate about them is that they look like a nice short bedtime book, but they are actually quite long.

@AntiHop NOOOOOOO a new generation

Basically the bottom line in all of them is you need to change who you are to suit others. I'm gonna write one called Mr fuck off im fine as I am. In it he takes a shovel to Mr Happy (who has taken it upon himself to rock up to Mr Fuck Offs and is now resident in his bloody living room) and now there is a Mr happy shaped hole in the back yard.

I really hate mr happy if you haven't noticed.

@Itwasgoodwhileitlasted I'm not even going to dignify that with a response