To think this a weird gift to give me

[rooty123]

Birthday was at weekend. Quite a shit one due to Covid but as expected. However, my DM has given me a gift which is still puzzling me.

I hate having photo taken, I'm not attractive, (that's fine, I have other qualities!). I've had a terrible experience in the past with a group photoshoot thing where we were basically locked in studio until we agreed to pay extra for horrific photos. We didn't even have wedding photographer as I find posed shots so awkward. My DM knows all this.

So my gift, which DM spent ££ on, is a makeover photoshoot thing. I can't think of a worse way to spend half a day of free time I don't have!

I've said thanks obviously but how am I going to avoid doing this? Just thinking about it is making me feel stressed. Urgh.

[quote OVienna]**@Nanny0gg* I wonder if she's won it.*

This was my exact thought too.

I wouldn't even have a clue to know where to go to buy something like that. I have only heard about people winning them but didn't they used to send salespeople out on the street to try to convince people to get haircuts/makeovers at a new salon? I can remember being approached for something like this on Oxford Street 20 years ago...

Could it be a regift @rooty123 ? It sounds like a weird gift for your mum too though.

No one wants a picture of themselves alone, IME, unless they're a 13 year old Instagrammer. In which case, have the photo taken with your own phone, right in front of your face![/quote]
As a few others have said, you get people in shopping centres flogging these kind of vouchers, often suspiciously cheap or sometimes even for free - the studio makes it's money by getting you in the door thinking you are getting something for nothing, or very little anyway, then hard selling you the hideously overpriced pics - the more unscrupulous ones will even try and say you have to buy more pics to cover the photographers time or similar even though that was supposedly included in the 'voucher'. It's the same kind of scam/con-lite where studios send out people to pose as 'model agents' and try and get people to 'come for a free test shoot' which results in them being pressured to buy photos 'for their book' - sometimes even the same studios/photographers do both.

Hopefully the one OP's mother has bought is more of a reputable local studio that may refund or red letter days or similar who will swap for a different 'experience' at the same price?

Can you check how much she actually spent? These things are usually cheap (even if it's a makeover 'worth over £100') because they make all their money on the photos.

But, at the end of the day, she's bought you a present you hate. The two options are, she's disappointed you don't like your present or you have a shit experience. Since it was your birthday I'd suggest the former. Refund, sell on, regift or donate as raffle prize

If it’s anything like the newborn baby ones, it’s a horrible rip-off. It might not be if she’s paid up front, though. We got conned by the baby ones because we had no idea what we were walking into. Stand in shopping centre with balloons, 2yo DD made a beeline for them, they gave us a free voucher pointing out that I was heavily pregnant and might fancy a baby shoot, and then kept phoning until we booked it. In the meantime DS was born, we had a huge fight with my mum and DS was admitted to hospital with suspected meningitis (he was fine), so fending off the photo people was the last thing on our minds. Did the shoot, then went back to see the heavily air-brushed pictures, and got the very hard sell. I pointed out that I was on mat leave and my income was about to drop dramatically, and they just looked blank. In the end we did pay up but I utterly regretted it and I do think companies that do this are scum. If i I could go back in time I would just have taken their poxy balloon and refused to do the stupid shoot. The best pic in it is of our old dog.

I think your DM possibly thinks it would boost your self-esteem to have a photo taken where you are made to look your very best by professionals. Perhaps she would like a good photo of you for herself. If you normally avoid cameras there won’t be many photos of you in existence ... I realised the other week that there are very few photos of me anywhere apart from ID ones!
Your feelings about this “gift” are understandable, but perhaps the sentiment behind was a good one .

I can tell you manipulative reasons to give the gift which one would be knowing you don’t like it and may say so and the person can act hurt and like you’re ungrateful and have even made them feel terrible now so that if you try to explain perfectly valid reasons they can claim to have been taken all wrong in their act of ‘self fulfilling’ ‘kindness’. Another reason could be knowing you won’t use it so they can grumble at the waste or if you dare suggest a refund. Another reason can be that it didn’t cost them anything and was won by them in some way and one suggestion was that it could be gifted to someone as these companies know that it’s even more likely that the money returns will be vast if it’s from guilt from not using a ‘gift’. All those reasons aside all you need to know is that you are right to be hurt that your own mother disregarded your past hurt enough to present you with a gift that doesn’t inspire feeling loved in you because you would have much preferred no gift with a thoughtful card than you do this gift that is opening Pandora’s box regardless of whether you use it or not. Hugs because it’s shit. In your case I would present it as not using it so she can get a refund as you can get beautiful pictures on your smartphone and you could even have one made into a key ring or something like that for her birthday or even just stick a pic in a cheap frame. If she’s someone who loves a thoughtful yet sign of having spent quite a lot then this will not make her any more pleased than your Ford from her has and of age tries to complain then she would look ungrateful and materialistic so win win if that is indeed the case xxx

Gift from her has and she that should read not Ford and her and age like it’s auto corrected to!! X

YANBU. For me, this would be on a par with being gifted a spa day. Awful.

The thing that makes this extra shit is at the present time I think most people would love to have something nice to cheer them up, on a special occasion. Who the fuck wants to commemorate their 2020 mid-various stages of lockdown self???

OP - if you are anything like me, you could make this a very funny photo. I'd be tempted to turn it on its head.

Reminded me of when my lovely sister bought me one as a gift for Xmas. As I was heavily pregnant, I decided to make it a mother and daughter one with my older child. When I arrived, though, the photographer was obsessed with my bump. She wanted it exposed in every pic! She made me put on long see though white gowns and hold flowers! Really really not my style. However it gave me such a laugh. And I actually came away with some beautiful pics of me and my dd.

I was given one of these years ago by my colleagues at work. We had an arrangement that for birthdays everyone in the office would chip in £5 for each present and then each person would get a really nice present. My birthday came around and that’s what I got. I have never worn make-up in my life, not even when I got married. I’m not a “dressing up” kind of person. I really didn’t know what to say.
Fortunately it was done through Red Letter Days and they let me change it for a day RIB blasting in the Solent. Much more my scene!

Can you sell it on FB marketplace?

My sister bought me this kind of thing as a present. I hate stuff like this but as she had bought it, it would be unfair to not go. We were in a queue waited ages then she guilted me into buying a large portrait for our parents. It was ducking awful, never again.

Years ago, DCs 2, 4 and 7, walking through shopping center, called over, free voucher given worth 30 quid or something ''towards a family photo shoot''.

Studio was apx 1.5 hours drive away but we went and did it because we didn't have many nice pics of the kids with both of us and the dog and we thought - stick with what ever the £30 voucher gets us and just have a good time. And we did have fun. They looked after us, kids enjoyed it, dog enjoyed it, all good.

Well, when we went back to view the photos were produced in black and white and they were lovely. The kids looked gorgeous in them all. The £30 voucher got us most of the way towards ONE framed pic. We had to throw in £10. We chose one (v.hard) and said we'll just have that one and put the voucher towards it please and thank you.

MY GOD the hard sell that followed! They tag teamed us and tried everything in the book - But the thing was we were so broke back then it was a big deal to add the tenner for the one pic so it was all a total waste on us trying to get us to spend more. We had no more! The hardest bit was turning down any gorgeous pics of your kids - but we would have had to have done that anyway, no one could have afforded the whole lot there were loads!

(I still love the one picture we got ... of the kids and the dog and me - but the husband is an X now and i don't want him on the wall! )