I don’t want a charity shop BLANKET!!

[ScaryBizkit]

I have a blanket in my couch. I use it a lot. My dogs have wrecked it over time (hair, slobber, it smells etc) so I told my mum I was replacing it. She said “I’ll get you one from charity shop”. I said “no it’s ok, I’ll just get the same blanket again from asda as I like it”. She said “that’s a waste of money as the dogs will wreck it” I said “it’s ok, it’s only £20” she said “that’s a lot more expensive than what I’d pay in charity shop” I said “it’s ok, I don’t mind” she said “but I might as well get you one from charity shop” !!!!! I snapped “I WANT IT TO MATCH!!!”

I don’t want mismatching shit all over my house. I tried being nice!!! She rang me this morning saying she was going to charity shop in morning so would look out for me a blanket!! Why won’t she accept what I’ve said?

This sounds like a relative of mine. They often buy things I haven't asked for or even needed. I know it sounds nice but I find it a bit controlling. They kept going on about my kettle (which I admit wasn't brand new but it worked) and saying I needed a new one. I kept saying no I was happy with the one I had. Then one day they just replaced it with a new one while I was out.

It’s not the fact of whatever kind of blanket it may be, it’s that the OPs mother isn’t taking “no” for an answer - repeatedly. It must be so exhausting!

I'd send her a text saying:

Thanks for thinking of me but please do not buy me a blanket.

If she still brings a blanket, give it back to the charity shop.

My DM is similar but she tries to give me 20yr old crap from her house “for the kids” even if I say no. I’ve started just accepting it and getting rid because it saves the mental battle

All this talk of blankets is making me sleepy.

It’s not the fact of whatever kind of blanket it may be, it’s that the OPs mother isn’t taking “no” for an answer - repeatedly. It must be so exhausting!

This. Surprised so many people can't get the point of a simple post.

Just accept it op and throw it out. It will save you so much hassle and bother of telling her when she isn't going to listen anyway.

Sorry, but yes, I'd wash the blanket. (It has to be said. Five hundred times.)

More seriously, she can't force you to use the blanket. If you don't want it, give it back or get rid of it. Or store it somewhere out of sight, if you have the room. You might eventually find a use for it.

It's odd that she's so insistent. I understand wanting to save money, but she should accept your refusal. The whole thing is odd. I imagine this is just the latest in a pattern of behaviour where she refuses to accept your choices.

Give it back to her for Christmas

Obviously you should be able to choose your own blanket.

However if the old one is being binned then the new one isn’t matching it? Because it’ll be in the bin? Perhaps your mum was thinking she’d find one that matched your general decor anyway.

It is the not being listened to that appears to be the issue. House space costs so much in the UK; clutter costs space and what space you have it is nice if you can have arranged in a way you find pleasing. I find Christmas and Birthdays hard to deal with with the influx of stuff ( I frequently ask for experiences instead).

Ive got a lovely wool blanket from the charity shop.it was a bugger to wash mind, in the abth three or four times to get it clean. But I chose it myself not had it foisted on me by someone who can't take no for an answer.

Tell her thanks but you won’t use it as it doesn’t match! or maybe those naughty dogs chewed it up on its first use lol

My PIL are like this. Just for reference - I've nothing against charity shops and often buy things secondhand however they force it on me. I work on an industrial estate with a large charity shop close by and if I so much as suggest I'm looking for something new, they insist I go to said charity shop on my way home from work. I've never set foot in so far.
I'm moving house next month and am getting rid of lots of old, crap furniture that's seen 3-4 houses and definitely had it's day yet she insisted on taking it home with her because she couldn't let it go to the tip. Some people just can't stand waste I guess! Buy the blanket you want. Re donate the one she buys.

Either DM isn't alone, or she's really good at sock pupeting

The ethics of new vs second hand. OP is clear about the blanket she wants not a random second hand one foisted on her.

Maybe the ASDA one is known to be practical, of the right size and washes well. A charity shop one, who knows...

Binning a superflous blanket is a waste and donating back is creating an extra, unnecessary job. I favour regifting back to her at Christmas.

Good luck to your DM in finding a blanket in the charity shops right now. My local ones don't have any.

Sounds like my MIL, everything we pick for our house or our kids is wrong, and she wants to buy us things that she's picked. She'll do it under the guise of her choices being cheaper (eg charity shops) but really it feels like she's refusing to accept we have different taste to her. Husband spent ages the other day talking to her about how we were allowed to buy ikea furniture, that he knew she didn't like putting together flat pack stuff, but that he wasn't asking her to.

From the outside, especially if you've never had to deal with someone like this, getting annoyed seems an over reaction and ungrateful. But it's really frustrating.

We have so many plates, cups, cushions (so many damn cushions), etc that she's bought us because she doesn't like the ones we already had. All they do is take up space, and we've given up getting rid of them because she notices and replaces them.

However if the old one is being binned then the new one isn’t matching it? Because it’ll be in the bin?

But isn’t the OP buying a replacement - i.e. the same style? It’s not just any old blanket.

@MedusasBadHairDay

Sounds like my MIL, everything we pick for our house or our kids is wrong, and she wants to buy us things that she's picked. She'll do it under the guise of her choices being cheaper (eg charity shops) but really it feels like she's refusing to accept we have different taste to her. Husband spent ages the other day talking to her about how we were allowed to buy ikea furniture, that he knew she didn't like putting together flat pack stuff, but that he wasn't asking her to.

From the outside, especially if you've never had to deal with someone like this, getting annoyed seems an over reaction and ungrateful. But it's really frustrating.

We have so many plates, cups, cushions (so many damn cushions), etc that she's bought us because she doesn't like the ones we already had. All they do is take up space, and we've given up getting rid of them because she notices and replaces them.

I’d be giving them all back.

As Christmas presents.

@AlwaysLatte

All this talk of blankets is making me sleepy.

@motheroreily

This sounds like a relative of mine. They often buy things I haven't asked for or even needed. I know it sounds nice but I find it a bit controlling. They kept going on about my kettle (which I admit wasn't brand new but it worked) and saying I needed a new one. I kept saying no I was happy with the one I had. Then one day they just replaced it with a new one while I was out.

wow that is controlling!

My friend used to insist on buying stuff she thought I might like.

She would turn up at my house and tell me she got it all for me. I initially would buy the stuff from but then tell her not to do it again. She kept doing it and would get annoyed if I wasn't in or if I didn't want the stuff.

Eventually she tried to buy presents for me to give people at Christmas. I told her to take them back as I wanted to choose for myself and that it wasn't up to her how I spent my money.

She wanted to be helpful. She also loves shopping and picking up bargains. I've had to find stuff she can do so that she feels useful.

wouldn’t want a second hand blanket for a pet. What if other pets in the neighbourhood found out about it and shunned them?

Best thing I've read on the internet