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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this woman was a bit over the top on the road today?

100 replies

SweetCherryPie · 12/10/2007 16:17

On my way home i miss judges this womans speed and pulled out of a side road. She beeped me and i put my hand up to say sorry, my fault.

She then came right up to my bumper in a temper and i put my brake lights on to say "back off" and she backed off a little bit.

Then she decided to try and over take me but bottled it because other cars were coming towards her the other way. I know it's annoying when someone pulls out infront of you and i didn't do it on purpose. I think she over reacted especially as i had my baby in the car and a sticker saying 'baby on board.'

OP posts:

xXxamyxXx · 12/10/2007 20:46

ah no if i have a tail gater driving behind me i wait till we are at a stop,a hill stop and let myself roll back enough to give them a quick fright probably evil of me but tailgaters really unnerve me and cause accidents

Alambil · 12/10/2007 20:54

did you go fast (as in speed limit) when you'd pulled out?

I only ask cos I get loads of people round here pulling out and going REALLY slow - so stopping my steady progress and that REALLY hacks me off

Original poster

SweetCherryPie · 12/10/2007 20:55

Here is what happened because some of you have the wrong idea on what actually happened;

I came to the junction where i wanted to turn left. I looked right and saw a car coming but thought it was far enough away for me to pull out. I pulled out doing about 5mph because i was going from stopping speed. I had pulled out then suddenly the car beeped at me so i put my hand up (to say sorry.)

I quickly speeded up to 30mph as my car has fast acceleration. She then tailgated me for the next half a mile giving me evils in the mirror. I was quite frightened at this point because i hate tailgators and so i put my brake lights on so she would back off a bit. She did back off a bit.

The next thing i know, i look in my right wing mirror and she is not behind me anymore but at the side of me. I see cars are coming towards her the other way and panic, she went back behind me after nearly going head on with the on coming car.

I think her actions frightened her because she backed off for the rest of the journey. I was shaking so hard when i got home and you know when your blood heats right up and you get that horrible feeling.

Thats what happened.

OP posts:

2shoescreepingthroughblood · 12/10/2007 22:00

thats ok then......so she didn't have to brake

LittleBella · 12/10/2007 23:47

What bit of my response do you find OTT CaptainUnderpants?

The exhortation to be an adult?

CaptainUnderpants · 13/10/2007 09:12

LittleBella - 'grow the fuck up ' - a little bit OTT and not really necessary on this thread

lucyellensmum · 13/10/2007 09:44

HOW the hell did this kick off??? Poor OP made a valid point about the other driver, we all make mistakes (she says smugly as i NEVER make a mistake driving, EVER - dont believe me?? i cant drive ) The other drivers reaction was menacing and OTT, and totally in the wrong. ISnt it funny how perfectly rational people become demons behind the wheel, i even become a demon in the back seat!! I do rant and rave about peoples bad driving and DP says, i shouldn't, but what does it matter, they can't actually HEAR Me! Although i do remember getting out of the car to someone once who nearly drove into the side of our car because he was talking to the large group of people in his 4x4 (not sure that the 4x4 is relevant), i would have just settled for an oops, sorry gesture, but he started laughing to his mates - i was taking my baby home from the birthing centre - he got it, both barrels - i mouthed off for about five minutes, poor guy, in the end i just shrugged my shoulders, waved and got back in the car, he just sat there looking bemused. DP just sank down in his seat and tried to make concilliatory (is that a word) gestures to the other driver. BUT definately no aggressive driving as a result, it is against the law.

Littlebella, your post was inappropriate im afraid, i would be apoligising if i were you. Do you have PMT or something?

Bouncingturtleskulls · 13/10/2007 09:53

Littlebella - I agree with the point you were making to some extent, it is just you came over way too aggressive. The OP doesn appreciate she made a mistake. I've had people do the same thing to me but I manage to keep my calm and not tailgate them. However, I do tend to turn the air blue in my little car

Bouncingturtleskulls · 13/10/2007 09:53

I meand does not doesn!! LOL

Alambil · 13/10/2007 10:57

she is definitely a freak then!!

I get annoyed when people pull out doing 5mph and STAY at that speed (or only a tiny bit faster) but you got up to speed pretty fast, so you rectified the situation - she clearly just can't keep her cool and should possibly not be in charge of a vehicle!

Original poster

SweetCherryPie · 13/10/2007 11:57

"Grow the fuck up" was ott. It's like me saying i accidently knocked into someone and they turned around and punched my lights out because i knocked into them.

If i had said that Littlebella would you still be saying "Grow the fuck up?" I knocked into them accidenly so i deserved a punch? It's the same thing, if someone does something accidently they deserve a dangerous punishment?

OP posts:

scarybee · 13/10/2007 12:05

Umm - I don't really want to get involved but I don't think littlebella's 'grow the fuck up' was aimed at you sweetcherrypie. It was aimed at people who tailgate.

Here's her post: 'Er, how does driving up someone's arse constitute a reasonable response to someone making a mistake?

Honestly, some of you people are arseholes, really you are. If someone makes a mistake, they make a mistake. If you then drive up their arse to "make a point", and then a pedestrian runs out in front of them so they have to do an emergency stop, causing you to go into their car and kill their baby, do you really think that's all fine and dandy?

Grow the fuck up.'

She's saying the other driver is an arsehole, not you.

Original poster

SweetCherryPie · 13/10/2007 12:10

Sorry, i just read the last few posts before mine.

OP posts:

MellowMa · 13/10/2007 12:52

Message withdrawn

FllightAttendant · 13/10/2007 13:13

I have a 'P' plate. It was the best car accessory I have ever bought.

I'm not a new driver - I passed in 95, got an old Transit to live in for a while, sold it after a few months and never had another car.

I was a biker for a few years - that gives one a very good grounding in potential hazard spotting as it is so dangerous.

I am now driving almost daily in my mother's car, which we use for the school run.
I had a few weeks practice in it over the summer, during which I was hooted at a lot because I was hesitating, going slowly/just below the speed limit - even at the limit - and then I bought a'P'.

I have not been abused by anyone behind me since - I get into a state or go slowly fir whatever reason - usually being cautious - and people see the P and are more patient.

Oh except one 4x4 driver who nearly hit me when I had stopped, indicating, on a country road and she wasn't looking in front of her.
She looked angry. I didn't care as I had seen her in the mirror approaching at about 50 and though we were all going to die!

whiskeyandbeer · 13/10/2007 13:23

"I think she over reacted especially as i had my baby in the car and a sticker saying 'baby on board.' "

in fairness baby on board stickers are red rag to any driver.

FllightAttendant · 13/10/2007 13:27

Sorry, W & B, do you seriously mean that? And whom is that being fair to?

whiskeyandbeer · 13/10/2007 13:34

not so much to me, i do think they are a bit pompus and condescending but they don't enrage me. but from anectdotle evidence and from being in cars with people who do get enraged by them, they certainly do piss off a lot of people.
not saying it's right,just saying that's how it is for a lot of people. so the driver the op cut up on the road may have been pissed off at being cut off on the road and may have been one of these people who hates "baby on board" stickers which only doubled her anger.
still no reason to react with dangerous driving as two wrongs don't make a right.

Original poster

SweetCherryPie · 13/10/2007 13:36

I am gonna take my sticker out the car now. I hated them anyway but someone on here said people are a bit more patient with you. They are not.

OP posts:

FllightAttendant · 13/10/2007 13:36

Why do people hate them?

whiskeyandbeer · 13/10/2007 13:40

because they insinuate that the person in the car thinks you are a shit driver and should drive more carefully because they have a child in the car and that somehow a baby being killed in a crash is worth more than other human life.or that until i saw the "baby on board" sticker on your car i had fully intended to speed,swerve around the road and then top it all off by smashing my car into yours but now that you have a baby on board maybe that's not such a good idea,i'll just find someone without a baby on board to crash into.

Original poster

SweetCherryPie · 13/10/2007 13:40

I think because they have got a bit of joke tbh. Mine is just a plain 'baby on board' sign but some have 'little princess' 'grandparent on board' 'stressed mother on board' signs and some have two or three in their windows. It's got silly.

OP posts:

FllightAttendant · 13/10/2007 14:02

Thanks for explaining - to my mind their use is similarly intended to my 'P' - it's about saying to people, I'm driving carefully/annoyingly slowly, because usually I am a shit driver, and I don't want to kill/wake up my baby so plese don't get too pissed off with me!'

LittleBella · 14/10/2007 19:57

LOL at have I got PMT, no I didn't have, but I might have now...Sorry if you thought I was OTT, but I found it a bit shocking that people were saying that as the OP had made a mistake, she should expect another driver to drive dangerously in order to "punish" her.

I think there's far too much of that sort of thinking about, and that's why someone dies every day on the roads in Britain. When ten people die altogether in a train crash or something, we're all shocked about it; but over 300 people die each year on the road and many, many more people are permanently injured and scarred both mentally and physically. It costs us all as taxpayers a fortune; the costs to the emergency services, NHS, employers, highway services, coroner services, judiciary etc. is huge. And I suspect that if people were a little more patient and tolerant on the road, that particular bit of our tax bill would go down. And we'd all be happier. There's something about the way we are taught to regard driving in this country that is hugely unhealthy imo.

fuzzywuzzy · 14/10/2007 20:04

There are far too many wankers out on the roads. We were coming home from a family meal out last night, and a man decided it would be great to try and run us off the road as we came up to the entrance of a four lane roundabout.... we had the girls in the car and I've never been so terrified in my life, dh pulled up beside the middleaged git, and I asked him if he was drunk, to which he replied 'no love but there are lanes to stick to, to which I snarled 'yes and the lanes are clearly marked, so why did you not stay in yours??? Can you not see I have kids in the car...' he had nothing to say and made shrugging faces, so I screamed what I thought of him, then got home and reported the git, you bet I took his licence plate number.
If anyone knows the long haired, middle aged, silver BMW driving wanker who tried to run us off the road at ilford, let him know the words I screamed were f*ing Wanker wont you..

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