to think mindfulness doesn’t work for everyone?

[notinthestarsigns]

I went to a mindfulness session this evening, it was the first session of a 4 week course and I am going to keep going, but I really don’t think it is for me! I find Yoga and physical exercise is really beneficial for my mental health but this session involved things like holding a raisin in your palm, feeling how light/heavy it is, stretching it and looking at the wrinkles on it. If it does help others, which I’m sure it does, then it’s great that it exists, but unless I’m missing something then I really can’t see me getting into it. I found the Chinese takeaway and glass of wine I had when I got home much more relaxing!

I think mindfulness can be found / accessed in many different ways - I'd definitely class exercise and yoga as a form of mindfulness. It's a process of slowing your thoughts down, streamlining your brain and concentrating on the here and now. The raisin method seems odd, but helps some to achieve it, yoga and exercise helps you to achieve it. Just got to find your method!

Yes maybe that’s it, I find exercise really helps with stopping a million things whizzing round my head so I suppose that is mindfulness working for me. The raisin thing was only part of it, there were other things too but I certainly wouldn’t say I found it relaxing.

Yanbu. I've tried it lots and hate it.

I found exercise, talking to friends, routine, fresh air and talking therapy much more beneficial for me

@BugCatcher879 I’m glad to hear I’m not the only one! At the beginning of the session the lady running it was talking about all the research on showing how beneficial mindfulness is so made me think I am missing something but I suppose everyone is different in terms of what works for them.

Yanbu. I can't think of anything worse.
There was a news report lately that showed it didn't suit everyone.

Stick with it - the point of the raison exercise isn't to be relaxing or life changing but an intro to awareness on an everyday object that is multi-sensory e.g 'oh never really noticed it was so... wrinkly/amazing/boring/tasty/sweet/whatever'. YANBU mindfulness isn't for everyone but some of meditations and approaches can be useful 'tools' in the kit (along with yoga etc). The raisin exercise isn't usually repeated BTW, it's just an intro. You'll probably be introduced to a range of practices including movement and breathing etc.

I did a mindfulness course and it was staggeringly dull. I thought it’d click, but it never did. I ended up loathing the Pollyanna teacher who would dismiss any quibble of doubt from any of us. Utter waste of 200 quid and a 6 Friday afternoons.

And my course started with the raisin caper too. Soon you’ll be separated into groups and drawing feelings with crayons.

Mindfulness is pretty useful in general not so much for relaxation (though it may do that) but more for building self-awareness e.g 'oh look there's that self critical thought again' rather than being 'inside' the thought without question 'I'm so stupid'.

Mindfulness is a skill to be learned, which takes time. Sadly you don't just get to reap the benefits on your first session.

Stick with it or don't, but don't dismiss it to others if you are ditching it because it wasn't immediately useful.

Mindfulness is a concept, and can be interpreted in a lot of ways. My counsellor told me one way of doing mindfulness is washing the dishes and focusing on the action, whereas when I was the dishes I have to listen to something on TV or my phone otherwise my mind wanders into a bad place. But jigsaws really work for me, or puzzles.

I think it can definitely work, you just have to find the way it works for you. If exercise and yoga is your thing, then do that!

I have never had a raisin presented during mindfulness sessions...

I personally find mindfulness has helped my health. I agree it isn’t for everyone. Do try and go with an open mind to the last three sessions. If yoga or other activities work better that’s great - we are all different.

Can’t you just be “mindful” and try to be in the moment more. I’m not sure you need a class? I try to focus on my surroundings/sensations more. I’m not sure I need a class to teach me

@NeuroticKindofNormal I am going to stick with it, as I agree that I don’t think you can really tell from just one session, my first impression is that it isn’t for me, but I am going to keep going for the duration of the course and certainly wouldn’t dismiss it to others.

I used to love raisins.

We’ve had to do a lot of this through work. I find the whole idea of it a bit MC naval-gazey and time wasting! I find myself actually getting a bit (LOT) wound up by the amount of time I’m spending thinking about breathing/colours/size of stuff etc... just get on with life!!
To be fair though I feel similarly about yoga in that I don’t find it a time efficient use of a spare hour I might find to exercise

Mindfulness...what a load of old wank.

Extreme navel gazing bollocks.

As for people who advocate it for chronic pain, which includes the NHS page "How to get NHS help for your pain", they can just sod off.

I am in pain 24/7 without painkillers and even then they only take the edge off most of the time.

Being told go for a walk and have a little think about my pain to cure it, pisses me right off. Makes me want to hit the person suggesting it really fucking hard repeatedly and when they are going "ouch", I can suggest a walk and a think will take their pain away.

Sorry but the way this is being touted as the answer to some very serious physical and mental problems makes me extremely angry because it is basically telling people who are suffering to shut up, go away and deal with it themselves.

I imagine mindfulness would make me climb the walls with boredom after about 30 seconds. But I hope you get something great from the effort,. OP.

I think forcing a certain way of practicing being mindful is missing the point.

You need to focus on everything that is going on around you to feel present,not focus on one thing like a raisin.

Example ... Had to travel into London by train that would normally cause me great anxiety.

Instead of focusing on what might happen on the way or experiences of the past.I focused on getting on the train,colour of the chairs, people around me,rain on the windows... and on and on.Present in the moment

It really is helpful for quieting the mind but doing it physically through yoga is also just as valuable,but I’m lazy so brain over brawn for me 😉

Thanks all for the replies, it is interesting to hear different view points on this.

I've never found mindfulness any help at all. Only thing it did was to show me that I often, quite naturally, stop and consider myself and the 'here and now' and be focussed on the present etc. If I want to de-stress or concentrate my thoughts I use different techniques, mindfulness doesn't do it for me at all. Total waste of time...but others find it helpful. It's just not for me.

I have a friend who loves it. I always thought it wasn't for me. Absolutely couldn't see the point of it. She somehow got me on a course and 6 months on it is helping me profoundly. I think it's one of those things you have to stick with and learn about fully. I am finding it pretty life-changing really. I fully appreciate it's not going to be for everyone but give it a chance for a few weeks at least. You only really get the benefits if you do it every day or nearly every day and you ride out the boredom etc.

I have to say, although I don’t get on with it and find any benefit from it, I don’t mock or ridicule anyone who has found it useful to them.
I must find my mindfulness in other ways!
I just find the concept a bit emperors new clothes. People always have and always will find ways to decompress, focus, think deeply. It’s just been marketed now and sold to people as a package.
But there’s something for everyone so each to their own obviously.

Haha you sound exactly like me. I like my raisins made into wine not in the palm of my hand.