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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Not allowed to go home at the weekend, not allowed to mix with students outside your bubble, not allowed to have parties, maybe not allowed for Xmas?

434 replies

chomalungma · 25/09/2020 08:10

I really feel sorry for students at Uni in Scotland.

Those students who are feeling isolated. Those who just want some fun and to experience student life.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-scotland-politics-54285720

And break these rules and you could lose your university place

OP posts:
Anon00 · 26/09/2020 09:08

@Figbee

I'd love to see how well the world functions if all middle-aged and older people are shielding.

Yes me too, especially considering those they live with would have to be careful too. I agree there is more the government should be doing to help ease us back, but even the Tories acknowledge it isn't fair or workable.

The world coped during lockdown it would cope again, there’s currently a fashionable narrative that students are dumb and incompetent but this actually isn’t true
Coffeeandbeans · 26/09/2020 09:46

Figbee
I'd love to see how well the world functions if all middle-aged and older people are shielding.

Yes me too, especially considering those they live with would have to be careful too. I agree there is more the government should be doing to help ease us back, but even the Tories acknowledge it isn't fair or workable.”

During the whole of lockdown my 17 year old volunteered every day in a community store delivering food boxes to the elderly and those shielding. I worked through the whole of lockdown and I’m middle age. My son’s mates run pubs, worked in Tescos, delivered shopping, etc etc. So give these young people some credit please. The world would be fine if we locked down the elderly as we did it before.

Smallereveryday · 26/09/2020 09:55

I'm so relieved DD persuaded me that a gap year was the best thing this year. Especially as she was heading for a Northern Uni now in lockdown area.

It's genuine madness. I have no idea why they encouraged millions of kids to move around the country in a pandemic .. they are all studying from their student lodgings .. why on Earth weren't they encouraged to stay home , save money and study in exact the same way as they are at the moment . Only with family /friends.

Maybe I'm cynical, but is it all about the money Universities make on accommodation ? Have they pushed returns in order to fill their coffers ? Because it didn't take a rocket scientist to realise this would happen .

Viciouslybashed · 26/09/2020 10:00

I am struggling to see why students can't wait a year and then go. It was fairly obvious that being at university was going to be restricted and therefore probably not the experience that many wanted. Has everyone been living somewhere else where covid and its troubles doesn't exist.

Aragog · 26/09/2020 10:07

The whole household will isolate if one of them is infected so they will be with at least five other people.

18t Dd would have to isolate with three people she has yet to meet.

Two are post grad so early 20s. Other is second year. All are in different courses. They're all different ages and different year groups. It's not halls of residence but private student halls.

And this is purely down to the debacle the government caused with their exam mess up meaning students lost first choices and therefore first choice accommodation.

Many of these kids are away from home for the first time and don't even know the people they are being asked to form a household with, at the same time as being told they can't mix with anyone else and discovering that their promised 60% f2f isn't actually happening anymore and they're actually only on 1-2 hours a week max. And they're tied in to accommodation for an entire year so financially they've not much choice unless they just ignore the fact they're paying £115 per week not to use it.

It's rubbish and it's unfair on young students who've already had so much messed up for them.

I don't blame the lecturers by the way. This is not their fault at all. They're trying their best to make things work.

But the government should have known this. They should have been making plans that didn't involved tens of thousands of young people travelling all over the country and then deciding to lock them all down with little chance to even get to know people in new towns and cities.

ZaZathecat · 26/09/2020 10:11

It was not 'obvious' in late 2019 and January 2020 when students were applying. Even when lockdown started we were informed it might be all over in 12 weeks or so. Once a place has been accepted, it is not automatically allowed to defer it. There was no guarantee that deferring would be a better option - would there be jobs? (000s laid off already), not a good time to travel, and I don't believe anyone could predict a whole first year at uni with everything online. It's easy to be wise after the event.

Aragog · 26/09/2020 10:12

I am struggling to see why students can't wait a year and then go.

And what about next years cohort?

Viciouslybashed · 26/09/2020 10:18

I'm not pretending to have all the answers but I am saying no chance my 18 year old would be going off to uni during a pandemic. I don't think they would want to be taking on debt to sit inside. I just think it was something that could be delayed. I am not blaming universities as such but would like to know what their risk assessment plans look like.
I loved university so much but feel so sad for these young people facing the wrath of some media sections etc. It's all so shit.

Viciouslybashed · 26/09/2020 10:20

I don't pretend to be wise as I had assumed, wrongly, that all places could be deferred. However my friends kids all seemed to get their places after results days so felt surely they could have delayed going away.

Anon00 · 26/09/2020 10:29

@Viciouslybashed

I am struggling to see why students can't wait a year and then go. It was fairly obvious that being at university was going to be restricted and therefore probably not the experience that many wanted. Has everyone been living somewhere else where covid and its troubles doesn't exist.
And do what for the year exactly? There’s no jobs, sit at home on their phones ?

You’re essentially saying ‘I’m struggling to see why they can’t just give up a year of their life’. Are you willing to do that or is it just because they’re young they’re less important

Viciouslybashed · 26/09/2020 10:41

No I am not saying that but surely it could be online as I know that is a thing and some are doing their course that way.

Viciouslybashed · 26/09/2020 10:45

I am not saying in any way shape or form that because they are young they are less important. I think they need to have been given a vaiable alternative rather than being told yes come here and then we are going to blame you for coming. That's just madness.
I don't know what makes you think we are having a disagreement with each other. I think we are both on the side of the poor students stuck away from home being told they can't do what they could normally do. Your response is to say they couldn't defer, I said I had not realised that.

Belladonna12 · 26/09/2020 10:49

@Aragog

The whole household will isolate if one of them is infected so they will be with at least five other people.

18t Dd would have to isolate with three people she has yet to meet.

Two are post grad so early 20s. Other is second year. All are in different courses. They're all different ages and different year groups. It's not halls of residence but private student halls.

And this is purely down to the debacle the government caused with their exam mess up meaning students lost first choices and therefore first choice accommodation.

Many of these kids are away from home for the first time and don't even know the people they are being asked to form a household with, at the same time as being told they can't mix with anyone else and discovering that their promised 60% f2f isn't actually happening anymore and they're actually only on 1-2 hours a week max. And they're tied in to accommodation for an entire year so financially they've not much choice unless they just ignore the fact they're paying £115 per week not to use it.

It's rubbish and it's unfair on young students who've already had so much messed up for them.

I don't blame the lecturers by the way. This is not their fault at all. They're trying their best to make things work.

But the government should have known this. They should have been making plans that didn't involved tens of thousands of young people travelling all over the country and then deciding to lock them all down with little chance to even get to know people in new towns and cities.

She hasn't met them yet but she will have done if she gets coronavirus won't she? I am not saying that everything is fine for students at all. One of my own DC the student so I am well aware of what it is like for them. I also work in the University though and know how much preparation has been done for this. They are doing their best and I really don't see what else people expect them to do.

People keep saying that this was inevitable if thousands of people travel around the country but considering that coronavirus is everywhere anyway I don't see that it makes any difference whether they have travelled 200 miles or 3 miles.

Viciouslybashed · 26/09/2020 10:50

We also agree re the govt should have known this, that was who I meant when I said it was obvious that this was going to be an issue.

Belladonna12 · 26/09/2020 10:51

@ZaZathecat

It was not 'obvious' in late 2019 and January 2020 when students were applying. Even when lockdown started we were informed it might be all over in 12 weeks or so. Once a place has been accepted, it is not automatically allowed to defer it. There was no guarantee that deferring would be a better option - would there be jobs? (000s laid off already), not a good time to travel, and I don't believe anyone could predict a whole first year at uni with everything online. It's easy to be wise after the event.
I agree deferring wouldn't be a good option. There are no jobs. They can't travel. There would be nothing to do.
Viciouslybashed · 26/09/2020 10:53

Not the ideal way for aragogs daughter to meet her chuffing housemates by them getting ill with a virus is it. Such a shit situation.

Belladonna12 · 26/09/2020 10:55

@Viciouslybashed

I am not saying in any way shape or form that because they are young they are less important. I think they need to have been given a vaiable alternative rather than being told yes come here and then we are going to blame you for coming. That's just madness. I don't know what makes you think we are having a disagreement with each other. I think we are both on the side of the poor students stuck away from home being told they can't do what they could normally do. Your response is to say they couldn't defer, I said I had not realised that.
They had been given a viable alternative in most universities. Certainly where I work, we were told that everything had to be online even if teaching was also face-to-face. Some are obviously doing that as the occupancy in the halls was lower this year. However, someone wanted to come and I don't blame them. They are low risk group and they will be mixing with other people who are low risk and hopefully once things have settled down things will be relatively normal for them.
Viciouslybashed · 26/09/2020 11:00

I like the phrase relatively normal, it's all so odd now isn't it. I hope you are right and that will indeed be the case. I care a lot for a lot of the young people that have gone off to uni and I want them to have a fantastic time.

Belladonna12 · 26/09/2020 11:03

@Smallereveryday

I'm so relieved DD persuaded me that a gap year was the best thing this year. Especially as she was heading for a Northern Uni now in lockdown area.

It's genuine madness. I have no idea why they encouraged millions of kids to move around the country in a pandemic .. they are all studying from their student lodgings .. why on Earth weren't they encouraged to stay home , save money and study in exact the same way as they are at the moment . Only with family /friends.

Maybe I'm cynical, but is it all about the money Universities make on accommodation ? Have they pushed returns in order to fill their coffers ? Because it didn't take a rocket scientist to realise this would happen .

Universities didn't know a few months ago that cases would be rising rapidly at this point of time so no it wasn't obvious. Do you think they should have just shut down and gone bankrupt? What about students who had already completed some of their degree? Would it be fine for them to be told they couldn't finish?
Belladonna12 · 26/09/2020 11:08

@Viciouslybashed

I like the phrase relatively normal, it's all so odd now isn't it. I hope you are right and that will indeed be the case. I care a lot for a lot of the young people that have gone off to uni and I want them to have a fantastic time.
I honestly think things will be okay for them. They may not be able to have parties (yet) but they will be living with people their own age and will be able to socialise with them if not the wider university community (initially anyway)
ArtieFufkinPolymerRecords · 26/09/2020 11:09

@Asterion

If students voted, perhaps they'd be better valued by politicians.

As it is, youngsters don't vote, in any way as much as the middle aged and elderly.

My son certainly voted. I think out of all people in the under 25 age group, students are probably more likely to vote than non-students.

Most of this years first years won't have been old enough to vote in the last election.

ArtieFufkinPolymerRecords · 26/09/2020 11:25

I'd love to see how well the world functions if all middle-aged and older people are shielding.

How does vulnerable in the previous post translate to all middle-aged and elderly people? Most middle-aged people are not vulnerable.

Belladonna12 · 26/09/2020 11:32

The world coped during lockdown it would cope again, there’s currently a fashionable narrative that students are dumb and incompetent but this actually isn’t true

Not all middle-aged or older people were shielding during the previous lockdown though so irrelevant. Only be extremely vulnerable were shielding.

Belladonna12 · 26/09/2020 11:34

During the whole of lockdown my 17 year old volunteered every day in a community store delivering food boxes to the elderly and those shielding. I worked through the whole of lockdown and I’m middle age. My son’s mates run pubs, worked in Tescos, delivered shopping, etc etc. So give these young people some credit please. The world would be fine if we locked down the elderly as we did it before.

Why is it not giving young people credit to say that the whole world wouldn't function too well if allmiddle-aged and older people were shielding.

Ecosse · 26/09/2020 11:40

@Belladonna12

This is ridiculous scaremongering. Not all middle aged and older people are at risk from COVID- why on earth would all 40 year olds need to shield?