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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To lie about my location to the holiday accommodation?

409 replies

Rae34 · 21/09/2020 23:45

I am single and live alone so this period has been very difficult. I have also worked from home since March and have been very careful with who I see and where I go. Just took my temperature there & normal. About 99% sure I am virus free.

Anyway I had booked 3 days in a cottage by the seaside, about 2 hours drive. I am an artist and have been so looking forward to finishing my project and getting some breathing space before what lies before us in the next season.

The booking.com accommodation has just been in touch asking where I am coming from because I am in a restricted area they will not accommodate me any longer. Well sadly I am in such an area. AIBU to tell a white lie and say I'm coming from the next city over (which is not affected)?

I have been so, so careful and was so looking forward to a short break. Also doubt I'd get a refund and it wasn't cheap.

OP posts:
Eckhart · 22/09/2020 09:43

There is no lawful or logical reason why not

Except that the hosts absolutely have the right to say who they do and don't want in their premises, and it's not up to OP to over ride that. But OP has the right to a refund too, if the hosts aren't giving her what she paid for.

TantieTowie · 22/09/2020 09:46
  1. Tell them the truth.
2.They give you a refund because they are no longer willing to supply a service that you have booked/paid for but which you are able to use – and there are no local rules saying that you can't. (2.5 If they refuse, tell them you'll take them to the small claims court or refer to your credit card company if paid via a credit card).
  1. Book somewhere else with the refunded money.
emilyfrost · 22/09/2020 09:47

Again, OP is NOT breaking any rules!

saraclara Yes she is, she’s breaking the property owners rules, and they get the final say on who they do and do not want in their property.

They don’t want people from restricted areas and that’s absolutely their right.

SockYarn · 22/09/2020 09:49

@blue25

You’re not above the law. This is affecting pretty much everyone’s mental health. It doesn’t give you the right to do what you want and ignore the rules!
But there is no law which says the OP can't travel.

Just some random ROOLZ made up by a random accommodation owner. Just like the people on MN who like to make up ROOLZ about only walking for an hour, or not buying Easter Eggs.

Lovelydovey · 22/09/2020 09:56

I wouldn’t lie. But I would insist that they refund you if they refuse to accommodate you as you are not breaching any guidelines to stay there.

tornadoalley · 22/09/2020 09:58

It should be refundable if you are in local lockdown as it's not your fault you are not going, it booking.com who are refusing you.

Jaxhog · 22/09/2020 10:00

You can't possibly know that you don't have the virus, especially if you come from a restricted area. Are you really willing to risk other people's lives and the cottage owners' business?

MarieIVanArkleStinks · 22/09/2020 10:03

Rae, you won't get any sympathetic responses from Mumsnet. It is something of a neighbourhood prefect site, which gleefully eggs on any members posting about whether they should report their NDNs' comings and goings to the local mafia (sorry police) to go ahead and do just that.

We've had to cancel a weekend away in December because it comprises three households made up of eight people. DH and his friend decided it wasn't worth the stain on their professions if they did happen to be reported, and I also thought this was the right decision. I'm bitterly disappointed as it promised one of the few high spots for us this year, but it was inevitable. Likewise, it's pointless booking anything for half-term week (although we badly need the break) because the uncertainty is just as stressful.

Other people must make their own risks -v- benefits assessment based on their own circumstances, and one person is very different from a crowd of eight. It's all very well being sticklers for 'The Rules', as seen on this site, but it would help if The Rules weren't entirely arbitrary and it's highly likely people are not adhering to them because they make zero sense. Covid doesn't go to bed at 10 pm.

I wouldn't report you OP.

Frazzled2207 · 22/09/2020 10:04

@Jaxhog

You can't possibly know that you don't have the virus, especially if you come from a restricted area. Are you really willing to risk other people's lives and the cottage owners' business?
nobody can be sure they don't have the virus regardless of where they are coming from.

The OP is not breaking any rules by going and is far less likely to have it than others that have been going about their business in their usual way.

in these strange times, ALL businesses are 'at risk' in some way. If the owner wasn't happy he could shut it down entirely.

GabsAlot · 22/09/2020 10:05

no tel the truth but they should give you a refund if its not againt the rules

jacks11 · 22/09/2020 10:05

I would also say OP, that whilst I think you would be wrong to lie, I also think as it is not a legal restriction (such as in Wales, where there is restriction on movement) but due to the rules laid down by the owners/agents of the cottage that they should refund you as it is then who are cancelling your booking. If they refuse, I would look at taking it further. If you paid by credit card you can refer it back to them. There is a similar process with debit cards, though more limited scope than credit cards. If you paid via BACS or check, then you are in a more difficult position.

sunshinesupermum · 22/09/2020 10:05

In your position I'd go. You don't mix with anyone and presumably won't be doing so while you are away. Far too many posters are ignoring the impact on mental health this pandemic is having on people who live alone. #mentalhealth matters just as much as Covid and I'm speaking from the position of being a carer for my partner who is a long term Covid sufferer.

Stripyhoglets1 · 22/09/2020 10:08

I checked the gov guidance on this the other day and you are allowed to go under the rules - so if they are stopping you then yes tell them you live elsewhere.
As the rules allow it they are being unreasonable.

coffeelover3 · 22/09/2020 10:09

OP lots of people on here will tell you not to lie - but... you've assessed the risk, and found it very low, so for me, I would go :) But if you're looking for permission on here, you won't get it. Go and enjoy the mental break. It's going to be a very long winter, hugs.

Jaxhog · 22/09/2020 10:14

Other people must make their own risks -v- benefits assessment based on their own circumstances

No. That isn't how it works. If you increase your risk, you increase everyone else's risk as well (and vice versa). In a disease situation, the risk is accumulative. That is why it's so important for EVERYONE to follow the rules. Because, if you don't, you put everyone else at more risk.

Bramshott · 22/09/2020 10:14

If you are an artist and will be finishing a project at the holiday cottage location then surely that's travelling for work reasons?

notthemum · 22/09/2020 10:17

Mental health is important but you are completely wrong to assume that everyone else will be seeing their families and friends. Many of us don't have anyone or are not able to see them because of restrictions, health or other reasons. I am sorry you are upset but I honestly can't see why you should be able to do this when others can't and you are prepared to come on a forum to ask people to tell you it's OK to lie about it. If you feel that guilty about doing it don't. Or if you are doing it anyway don't ask for opinions and then be upset by what you are told.

Emmie12345 · 22/09/2020 10:17

@Bramshott I was going to say that too

OP I would wait till BJ announcement today anyway cos there prob won’t be local lockdown as from then , it’ll be nationwide

QueenofAsgard · 22/09/2020 10:23

I absolutely would OP.

TryAnotherNickname · 22/09/2020 10:23

@emilyfrost actually no, op doesn’t have to abide by arbitrary after the fact rules of the owners. She has to abide by the laws of the country (currently she is) and the terms and conditions of the booking which were made available prior to making the booking. The owners are not entitled to make random conditions about what colour knickers she has to wear or use of a frying pan on a Tuesday.

There are so many amateur holiday home owners who fail to appreciate the difference between a business and their home

Livelovebehappy · 22/09/2020 10:26

TBH, I’ve booked via booking.com for a weekend away this next weekend, and am travelling from a restricted area. I haven’t received anything from them, but I would imagine it’s the same as visiting a restaurant? As long as you are in your own bubble, you’re fine? Not sure whether I need to contact them as my payment is due in full tomorrow - I’m booked on a free cancellation as long up until tomorrow.

bettybyebye · 22/09/2020 10:28

I would go OP, and I would lie if needed

AntiSocialDistancer · 22/09/2020 10:30

I would go.

JaJaDingDong · 22/09/2020 10:30

Don't lie. Did you hear Chris Whitty yesterday? You're not taking a risk just for yourself, you're taking a risk for everyone you meet.

You're not special. The guidelines/rules/laws apply to you just as they do to everyone else.

We're all fed up. We're all working hard. We could all do with a break.

I repeat: don't lie, you're not special. It's people who think the rules don't apply to them who are getting us into this mess.

We've just cancelled the holiday we should have been leaving for today and I've only had 3 days of this year. You're not being fair to people who follow the rules if you ignore them.

shesgonebatshitagain · 22/09/2020 10:31

You CAN travel from a local lockdown area in England
If this were reversed and you decided not to go you wouldn’t get a refund as you can still legally go

If they don’t want you there for whatever reason then they refund you otherwise honour the booking.

If they don’t refund you then go You are free to travel there.

It’s the property owners who are in the wrong not you