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Original poster

To say I don't quite get the hatred for Gina Ford?

132 replies

wineandwhining · 21/09/2020 20:22

So, I have been given a copy of the Contented Baby and the weaning book, and came onto MN to do some reading and realised that you cannot even mention her? I ebf my DD so definitely don't stretch her feeds, but the naps we adhere to quite well.

I see on here lots of divisive feelings for the woman but after reading her books and getting my girl into a good routine, I don't get the controversy.

Can someone explain it to me?

OP posts:
NiceGerbil · 21/09/2020 23:09

No one in right mind wakes a baby at 7 am if it's flat out Grin

I think it's for people who find comfort in routine and control/ or need it for some reason (have to go back to work/ get older kids to school etc etc)

KarlKennedysDurianFruit · 21/09/2020 23:10

I don't get the need to be told when your baby should nap, your baby naps when they're tired, they BF when they're hungry, you hold them if they like it , you put them down if they don't. DH and I both work full time and DS slept for 3 hours just under at nap today, and has been tucked up in bed since 7:45. Did he wake a lot when tiny to be fed, yes, did he prefer to be snuggled up with me then put down to cry himself to sleep, yes, did he BF like an absolute demon wherever he felt like it, yes. He's not two yet and do you know what I haven't 'spoiled' my baby like several Gina ford fans told me I would, I held him, fed him, listened to his needs. He's now happy, confident and adaptable, eats well, sleeps well most of the time. Babies are babies and don't need shoehorning into a regime.

KarlKennedysDurianFruit · 21/09/2020 23:12

@NiceGerbil you've just summed it up, I'm pretty sure I'm also a monkey parent 😁

NiceGerbil · 21/09/2020 23:13

It is a good attitude with the life at school as well...

Come baby monkeys! Grooming time Grin

jakeyboy1 · 21/09/2020 23:18

My eldest is 8. My youngest is 5. When I had my youngest (ages 35) I heard some people refer times Gina as being "for old mums" !!!

I didn't follow it all with my first but it taught me a lot about routines. I'd take Gina over attachment parenting any day.

Nomorescreentime · 21/09/2020 23:29

Is that book still around?! My eldest is 13, this thread has taken me right back to reading it and wondering why my baby wasn’t fitting in with the times I should be eating toast. Funnily enough I have my copy to my best friend who said it was a lifesaver. Ahh the two babies are at secondary school now....

MrsApplepants · 21/09/2020 23:42

I loved the book. But then it was pretty much how I had been imagining and hoping to raise a newborn, as I like routine and order so I found it a real support and help. DD thrived on it, and I really enjoyed those early weeks, everything was very easy. It’s not for everyone though.

Melroses · 21/09/2020 23:45

@Jumpingkangeroo

But I don’t agree with the super nanny ‘naughty step’ either.
I used to have someone visit me that was into that. Drove me up the wall. Never made any sense.
SRS29 · 21/09/2020 23:46

@Londonmummy66

Actually I had 2 contented little babies can't say whether it was that their natural routine mirrored hers or not but worked for us.

I think that the main thing with GF was that she recognised that not everyone has the luxury of 12 months ML to devote 100% to their baby. Those of us who had to go back to work almost immediately do actually need their children to fall into a routine.

Ditto this, followed the feeding and sleeping routine, ignored the rest and worked for us Smile
FinallyFluid · 21/09/2020 23:48

I was here the night MN Towers came on and said she had her litigious hat on and that we were not to mention her name, being ever resourceful within minutes she had the acronym. SWMNBN. Grin

FinallyFluid · 21/09/2020 23:55

I made it my life work to go into book shops and move her books. Grin

converseandjeans · 21/09/2020 23:58

nicegerbil
No one in right mind wakes a baby at 7 am if it's flat out.

You do if it means they will go to bed at 7/7.30 and sleep through. Broken sleep is surely torture whereas getting up at 7 is a bit like getting ready for work.

dementedpixie · 22/09/2020 00:04

Why 7am though? What is wrong with 8am and 8pm? Or 9pm/9am

NiceGerbil · 22/09/2020 00:06

Well it's up to the individual obviously.

I'm not a morning person so it was a no brained Grin

I can't remember what age she said to do that from?

The children are different as well. DD 1 was like clockwork. DD 2, less so!

With a baby -and I knew fuck all about babies before I had one- it's about the situation of the parent/s, what the baby is like, and what fits best given the personalities and lifestyle/ preferences etc.

I think there's no point in this sort of diviseness these books etc make. I hate seeing the arguments on MN over different ways of doing stuff. Everyone, pretty much, is doing their best and getting on with it and probably has the same goals (cheerful family and sleep for all!!!).

minipie · 22/09/2020 00:06

If you have a baby like mine who only slept in 10-30 min increments maximum, GF has no advice and makes you feel like absolute shit. Just my experience.

GarlicMcAtackney · 22/09/2020 00:10

Gina will be ruining her naps to sue you all. Did your kid read the book, OP? So the kid will obey The Rules? Great.

Bourbonbiscuits20 · 22/09/2020 00:13

What's so wrong about the naughty step?
I've recently had a baby and recently read the book...I'm also in the camp of not sure why everyone's so hysterical about it, it's a good guide to try and implement some sort of pattern if you need it.
Don't understand the commotion about eye contact either, you don't have to be looking into your baby's eyes all day every day for them to feel secure?!

BlackeyedSusan · 22/09/2020 00:15

swmnbn.... you're brave.

3/4 of the kids at creche were gina forded as they were all sitting down to eat at the same time... Grin

ds would have fitted in with it, dd not. suits some parents, others not.

i read another one of those sorts of books, the baby whisperer... neither of mine suited that.

ds is still unwakable now. when he was young i could dress him and clean his teeth without him waking up.

NiceGerbil · 22/09/2020 00:15

I can't remember the book I took a few bits from. Easy or something? Eat activity sleep and.. yes? Can't remember Grin

I BF on demand and I don't do well without much sleep. GF was not for me. She is for some people. Horses for courses. I hate the diviseness I really do though. Women getting pitted against each other over anything maternity related.

I do feel a bit sad that we can watch other mammals with their babies on the telly and we know what is right, we just know it. But due to, I don't know what. Capitalism, nuclear families, all sorts of stuff. When it comes to our own young, all the things we know are natural are suddenly difficult, complicated, need to read a book, let's have a big row.

I didn't have a good time with little ones at all, but I do think that we need to get back in touch with our instincts if we can. Modern society has made us isolated on maternity and anxious and not trusting ourselves though.

MintChocAddict · 22/09/2020 00:17

Shhhhh Wink
On a similar note is Annabel Karmel still the menu book of choice? I remember running out to buy bouquet garni despite having no idea what it was and sweating over many butternut squash peeling sessions!

NiceGerbil · 22/09/2020 00:19

If it feels natural to you not to make eye contact with your baby while you feed them (or was that just the last feed?) then that's you doing you.

For the women it doesn't feel natural to, they shouldn't do it because a book says so.

I couldn't have not done it. When they were gurgling at me and grinning and what have you Smile

I had PND so than God I BF otherwise they wouldn't have got those cuddles, skin to skin, eye contact etc.

Everyone is different. We all do our best.

Oliversmumsarmy · 22/09/2020 00:24

A friend tried the GF method. She read the book. Unfortunately her baby didn’t

NiceGerbil · 22/09/2020 00:26

Ah food! The other big fight club.

It's awful isn't it.

And some of the women on here- good lord.

I remember there was a thread about woeful BF stats. I was talking about how they only counted (then?) babies who had never had even a taste of formula and so they were discounting a load of babies which didn't feel quite right.

It ended up with some women saying because we offered a bottle to DD1 at I dunno 3 weeks or something and she turned her nose up. That because she may have had 1 drop, her gut lining was destroyed forever. Not exaggerating. I had PND at the time.

I mean it was ridiculous.

Why do women do this? I mean not all or even most. But birth choices/ feeding/ sleep are really angry horrible on here often.

Why?

remainin · 22/09/2020 01:50

I thought the name rang a bell! Wow, was it really 15 years ago?

remainin · 22/09/2020 01:58

There was some nonsense about fitting out baby's room with blackout curtains. I remember now how stressed I felt, wondering if I was doing everything wrong with DS; that GF's methods were the holy gospel of parenting. Good thing I dropped that plan (and her book) pretty quickly!