To think parents will begin to lie

[Settleandcalm]

DD has a slight temp for one day, as a result doing the right thing we eventually got the test, and a veeeery long time later the results. The test was awful making her vomit over herself, the wait for my older children who are already struggling being in and out of school also awful. But it was the right thing to do.

BUT. Would I put her through that test every 3 weeks which is the average she got a temp:cough last year? No. Can I afford to lose my job? No. I will do the right thing but I have an utter fear over it.

But I suppose I wonder how long it will take parents to start slipping back to the “watch and see” version of illness. If it’s just a bit of a temp on one day... just a bit of a cough... maybe give them a day and see if they are fine, rather than fight for a test or isolate The whole family for 14 days.

There are already kids in school coughing and I know only us and one other family has tested, so perhaps, because of the testing fiasco and inconsistent rules people are already starting to lie?

It’s just not going to work for a lot of people who need to work to keep a roof over their heads and put food on the table.

Many employers absolutely won’t tolerate parents being off for days at a time every time someone in the house has a temp.

Even people with understanding employers still won’t be able to keep going without full pay.

It just isn’t doable for a lot of people.

I believe I had Covid back at the end of March. Covid is a couch, it has no runny nose, a temperature and tightness in the chest. Also if you can still smell a curry you probably have a cold. This is not from a doctor so don’t take it too seriously.

Of course people will lie about symptoms but at my worst I couldn’t get a sentience out with coughing, I was confused and had a temperature. People with mild symptoms will spread Covid everywhere.

@TheKeatingFive

But those with vulnerable family, do you think they have choice?

Of course not. But given that they are focused on prioritising their particular needs, they can hardly be surprised if others have the same instincts (but different immediate needs).

All of this.

It's just numbers if it won't affect you. But if it did, 1 out of many is your loved ones. That's the only thing people need to think about, imo.

We kept the 14 year old home with a headache and sore throat. These are not official covid symptoms.

I paused before taking his temperature. If I didn't take his temperature the other kids could go to school. If I did take his temperature and it was normal, the other kids could go to school. If I took his temperature and it was fine the little kids had to stay home. I had a busy work day.

I took his temperature. It was normal. I felt so guilty for even considering not doing it, I then took it every two hours until he got fed up and went back to school.

Thing is pastandpresent - without access to tests, you're asking a lot from people.

If someone thinks their child has a cold, and isolating for 14 days would severely impact their income/financial situation to the detriment of their family, surely you can understand the approach of 'keep them off for a few days and see'?

If the government arent going to provide better access to tests then i dont think you can blame people.

I paused before taking his temperature. If I didn't take his temperature the other kids could go to school. If I did take his temperature and it was normal, the other kids could go to school. If I took his temperature and it was fine the little kids had to stay home. I had a busy work day.

I took his temperature. It was normal. I felt so guilty for even considering not doing it, I then took it every two hours until he got fed up and went back to school.

I did this today, it’s my bday which happened yo fall on my non working day so booked kids into nursery for an extra session. I always take their temp before they go to nursery as don’t want to be that parent who gets the whole nursery closed but today I nearly didn’t... but I did and was 36.4 phew!!!!!!

I do totally get it. And I am not blaming anyone. Just expressing my inner thought on an anonymous place.

I'm really sorry but I would lie.
Our test results took ages then one came back unclear so now we are having to self isolate for 2 weeks for a cough that accompanies a cold.

@swabthenose

She had an earache, then glandular sore throat, then headache and temp.

Apart from the earache, these are actually far more classic Covid symptoms in children than the main ones advertised, according to research.

So, I know that isn't Covid. I am not getting her tested

You don’t know it’s not Covid. Why bother with massive multinational testing programmes if it’s something you can just ‘know’? Not even medical practitioners can tell.

because the symptoms you are told to test for are consistent dry cough, high fever, and lack of taste/smell.

She doesn't have any of those. Not one.

And I wasn't even going about 'keep them off for a few days and see'?
approach, I was talking about parents lying to send the children to school.

yeah i agree there are variations on the 'lying' !

Its all so shit and I am so goddamn angry at our shitty government for allowing this to happen. If we had enough tests that could be processed in a reasonable timeframe we wouldnt even be sat here discussing this. I mean yes some people would still send their kids in/refuse to isolate but i bet vast swathes of people would be more inclined to follow what they're supposed to. Utter joke.

I know it's difficult to deal with, in fact it's a complete nightmare. But if parents are going to purposefully hide symptoms to allow their child to go to school, why are we doing this? Instead of one parent having to stay off work, it's going to be a whole class full when they have to isolate.

I think at this point we have to either accept it as a part of the many viruses in circulation, or we have to lock down FULLY again. I don't mind which, but this awful middle ground where people can't afford to keep their kids off because there's no support for that situation just isn't sustainable.

and just to add,
she has been at home the whoel time with symptoms, and while normally I would send them back to school as soon as well enough, now she won't go back until she is sympton free, ust in case.

But she has also now got a streaming nose.

We have just had this debacle. Tried to get a test all day Monday and Tuesday. Failed. We both NHS. Managed to get a test through DH's OCC health on Wednesday. Results still awaited. Had to work from home Wednesday (more difficult than going to work). Thankfully off rest of the week from before as it's our wedding anniversary. Meal cancelled.
If I had managed to get the test on Monday, we had results by the next day, there would have been no hassle.

Oh well I guess not having a thermometer gets around the whole dilemma about checking a temperature.

I find the whole thing a bit silly anyway, if you have a temperature you feel grotty to some degree so you'll know if you have one or not.

Government aren't exactly encouraging people to lie - but they are saying that we mustn't request for tests unnecessarily.

I was listening to Matt Hancock on R4 this morning. He made me feel guilty for wanting a test - I don't actually need one at the moment, but should we get ill I will want to be tested. And hearing his voice in my head will make me feel guilty. So I may very well send my kids to school and go to work etc just so as not to overload the test and trace system.

Yes I think parents will lie as there's a shit test+trace system (that is unable to perform either adequately), furlough ending and pressure for people to return to work, there's no safety net for people isolating, SSP is a joke amount of money and lots of people don't get it if they're working a gig job. As suggested by some scientist on TV, schools should have their own regional mobile testing unit that takes samples from schools in an area, any positive tests are followed up with a whole school test. Of course the UK is too bloody inefficient to carry out something as sensible as that so we're probably hot on our heels to a second lockdown with schools closing again and more jobs lost.

@pastandpresent

And steppemum, my comment addressing you was a bit unfair. I have known you for years, from your past comment over the years, so I did respond from how I see you from my perspective rather than seeing you as an individual poster on public forum. There was some bias, so I was wrong.

thank you for that pastandpresent I am a bit puzzled, as this suggests that you were a bit 'stronger' in your comments to me as you know me, which suggests you have a negative impression of me. I am not aware of ever having had a run - in with you, or clashing over anything? I am sorry if that is the impression you have of me.

YANBU. I've had that test and there's no way I'd put my toddlers through it unless I really, really had to. I'd obviously keep them off with a cough/temp but would avoid the test even if it meant lying.

This thread has just made things worse to be honest, huge inconsistencies in school policy (not their fault they are flying blind too), huge inconsistency in parental actions.

Some picking up on not sending in with symptoms anyway, to be honest while some parents will and always have bunged an actively sick kid into school, I am concerned about the majority who would have kept them off sick, but now it’s not just 1/2 days when they feel ill it’s 14 BLOODY days when they may seem perfectly well just because we can’t get tested.

Covid is horrific but it’s just not worth the damage this will do to kids, schools, parents and more importantly us judging ourselves and each other for trying our best.

DDad has Covid, he was very very poorly and lost a friend and even is he is saying Don’t test her next time unless you are sure the symptom is sticking around, just lie.

It’s an insane situation.

Why did we not just let regions manage the testing??

Should also note I am probably rattled as I won’t take the test again, the whole something shoved down your throat thing and standing it while trying not to gag and vomit I found highly triggering from past abuse.

I think they will. But not all out of selfishness. We are between a rock and a hard place. Who can afford to take more time off if they’ve only just returned to work? What to do with no childcare and can’t wfh?? Are we heading for lockdown across the board? Are we going to stay inside and hide away forever ?? Can we actually control the spread of this virus at all?? We are hitting a recession. We as a country and as individuals find themselves in debt and won’t be able to take time off because their kid has a cold and not Covid. But can’t travel 10000 miles to wait 15 hours in a que to get a rest and be turned away because they don’t have a referral. But they can’t get a referral because they can’t see a doctor. Our doctors have been closed throughout and are, still, now, closed to the public. Everyone is being sent to the hospital for EVEEYTHINF. it’s totally out of control. People are worried. I see both sides here. Maybe we just need to get on with it, be sensible, and beware of those who are antimaskers etc putting you in harms way. What a mess. It’s so utterly inconceivable that parents wouldn’t bend rules, they have no other choice in a lot of cases

My son's school will only send home the whole class on production of a positive test result. So if one child has symptoms they will send that child home and keep the other children in until they have been tested.
They have also stated that they will not be sensing sending children homw who obviously have a cold so I think they have proportionately taken a sensible approach. I feel that if the school were to send childen every five minutes parents would be doing their kids up with calpol like you would with a cold and packing them off anyway. The children are also allowed back in school as soon as they test negative. I have decided that although it would financially scupper me if it became a regular occurrence I would withdraw him and pay a chold-minder and home school him.

“But you can't have a whole society based on what amounts to state childcare and two-income families and think that somehow you can just change that without putting some supports in place. What we've seen is that rather like the supply chain, our domestic/work arrangements in many nations are not very resilient.“

Absolutely agree with this. Most people’s lives are that on the edge even in normal circumstances that even a slight deviation from the norm can see the whole thing starting to tumble, Covid has shown the incompatibility of long work hours by both parents as largely incompatible with family life and how reliant it is on outsourcing a lot of the traditionally parental role. When those outsourcing options are no longer there the parents’ working patterns are no longer sustainable.