Sayings / arguments on Mumsnet that you hate?

[Polkapoo]

There's a few but one I see often that just makes me is 'what if they were your kids?'.

It's obviously always said in response to someone who is not the child's parent and therefore surely a completely pointless argument?!

What others do you always see and eye roll at?

Or when people are describing something but don't want to give you the exact details so they put "think...." and then some other activity/place/food/hobby.

Brought .... it’s bought

'Get an STD test'

Yup, because as we all know, anyone who exists outside of monogamous marriage is absolutely laden with every sort of STI going, which they are certain to pass on to the poor mumsnetter sat at home, even thought they haven't had intimate relations with the offending spouse in 25 years.

'emotional affair'

Frequently used by mumsnetters to describe a situation whereby somebody has had a conversation with someone of the opposite sex who isn't their partner, and that conversation has included intimate or personal subjects, because, you know, heaven help anyone who doesn't feel capable of discussing these things with their partner, or confides in someone they trust to be objective and keep confidence.

"men don't leave relationships without an OW on the go"

Complete and utter nonsense. Men leave relationships for all the same reasons women do, including simply having had enough and deciding they'd be happier alone.

@Swearwolf, I've never understood that one either!

When posters mentions so minor thing (or thing that’s already been sorted) that happened to their dc and everyone says

“Oh the poor dc! That made me cry thinking about them. How devastating...” etc

Really good way to make the OP feel terrible about her parenting/ her children’s lives.

To be fair it’s quite annoying when even when it’s not minor, as the OP has usually described how upset they are already, how they are doing their best, and posters lay it on thick.

'Which bit of xyz don't you understand?'
'I despair'

Agree with PP about 'you do you'

uurgh

"I've asked DH what he thinks and he's said...."

Oh thank God, us intelligent and astute women were just sitting around waiting for an actual opinion to come along. Thank heaven for the penis people

Oh and any thread to do with step children where posters ignore the question and simply ask "Are you the OW"

Another one is one a few of us were talking about on here the other day.

Someone posts about their child having a terminal illness, or that their child has just died, and you can guarantee on that thread someone will say "oh I'm so sorry, my child is the same age and I've just hugged them a little bit tighter"

What the hell is a soon to be or recently bereaved parent supposed to say to that?

That one makes me really angry.

Friend called A, friend C And friend B all meet up regularly friend D who knows friends who we'll call E and F but they get on with B but not C and dont know A. Im arranging a meet up ... They're the worse. I give myself a headache working out who's who. I know its not ean expression.

Sanctimonious twats declaring you must 'model' behaviour in your marriage or relationship, in front of your children. Fuck that. I'm a fallible human just trying to exist and do my best every day.

Crack on. Arggggggghh!!!

It can be frustrating when OPs drip feed, or if it's a situation that seems like there's more to it than what OP says, or it's highly dependent on elements OP hasn't included in their post, but it does annoy me when people extrapolate and go for the worst case scenario based on very little.
Like, if OP said "I'm not keen on honey. I'd eat a honey sandwich but I'd prefer a jam one" someone chimes in with "WHY DO YOU HATE BEES AND WANT THEM ALL TO DIE?" Steady on, pet, everybody knows that's not what OP said or meant.

‘Arf’ so unimaginative and desperate.

"You sound like hard work"

@Viviennemary

Friend called A, friend C And friend B all meet up regularly friend D who knows friends who we'll call E and F but they get on with B but not C and dont know A. Im arranging a meet up ... They're the worse. I give myself a headache working out who's who. I know its not ean expression.

Yes and I always find there's a few posters who totally get it and say "Friend B IBU and C should LTB"

Nice.

Not “naice”. I don’t love that, but it has a special Mumsnet meaning, which I suppose has it’s place.

But I hate it when posters use ‘nice’ as the only qualifier when they’re making suggestions or offering solutions to another poster’s problems.

“How about a nice salad?”
“Maybe put your feet up and watch a nice film?”
“Why not plan a meal at a nice restaurant?”
“Pop some nice music on and chill.”

OH, THANKS FOR MAKING IT CLEAR THAT THOSE THINGS SHOULD BE NICE. IF YOU HADN’T SAID, I WOULD HAVE MADE MYSELF A SHIT SALAD AND CHOSEN A BORING FILM AND GONE TO A TERRIBLE RESTAURANT.

Are you always this difficult/controlling/demanding etc etc etc

Oh yes, 'naice' and 'give your head a wobble' as someone else said - should be punishable by law!!!

A poster posts about a problem with their mum.

ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS

"Count yourself lucky OP, my mum died last year"

Look that's very sad but FFS NO ONE lives their life as if every person in it could be dead. Nor should they.

I have a very difficult relationship with my mum and I've stopped posting on here about it because those women who are 'besties' with their mum can't understand why other people aren't and they pile on

Also, “it makes my teeth itch”.

Describing their thick oafish dh as a gentle giant.

Cool story bro

It makes me cringe for the writer

Or when people are describing something but don't want to give you the exact details so they put "think...." and then some other activity/place/food/hobby. yes really annoying!

Also when people talk about a hobby and won’t say what it is.

Lots of people have talked about people saying things are “outing” when they are really not, but I will go further and say the whole concept of “outing” is annoying. You’re not a bloody celebrity, no one cares!

The haughty food ones, where someone will claim a chicken can feed a family of six for a week and still have left overs for next weeks bloody meal plan.