Page 16 | Sayings / arguments on Mumsnet that you hate?

Polkapoo · 2020-09-17T17:40:34+00:00

There's a few but one I see often that just makes me [hmm] is 'what if they were your kids?'. It's obviously always said in response to someone who is *not* the child's parent and therefore surely a completely pointless argument?! What others do you always see and eye roll at?

imfatletsparty · 18/09/2020 11:51

"Is it really that LOL-worthy? Surely loads of people have never been to Scotland?"

Thinking it's a MN thing and that no one irl has ever said it when an entire country would probably say otherwise is a little amusing, yes.

"People from outside of Britain seem to love those insults, though. I've seen them make up their own along the formula. "Dickwaffle" was a favourite."

These are probably the same people who think Britain is full of delightfully eccentric gentleman farmers who are far too polite to just call someone a dick without making it somehow quirky.

Neron · 18/09/2020 11:54

ShebaShimmyShake there was a thread, with a young girl who was pregnant. BF not interested, she was still living at home with her parents in an overcrowded house and not ideal for raising a child. OP didn't want a termination, the family didn't think having a baby was for the best. Posters were telling OP it was her body her choice, to have the baby and tough luck basically to everyone else, they would have to suck it up.

dustyphoenix · 18/09/2020 11:55

Not a saying, but there's frequently posters on here who complain about the seemingly illogical covid restrictions saying 'I can do ABC but I can't do XYZ', for example 'I can go to my workplace with 50 other people but I can't go and visit my Mum' or 'My DC can go to school with hundreds of other kids but can't visit her Aunty'. Makes me want to bang my head against the wall. Its because you're doing ABC that you can't do XYZ - how hard is it to understand??!?

StillCoughingandLaughing · 18/09/2020 11:57

It's Scotland not Deepest Darkest Peru. If you're in the UK it hard to believe anyone hasn't had some exposure to hearing or reading something from a Scottish person. They're even on telly!

I know where Scotland is, thanks. How often are Scots saying ‘get to fuck’ on telly? I can’t really see Lorraine Kelly dropping it in when Piers Morgan is doing the handover from GMB (tempting as it may be).

Wishimaywishimight · 18/09/2020 11:58

When somehas an argument with their partner/DH and is advised to change the locks, pack their (partner/DH's) bags and leave them on the doorstop immediately. Utter utter nonsensical advice.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 18/09/2020 11:59

ShebaShimmyShakethere was a thread, with a young girl who was pregnant. BF not interested, she was still living at home with her parents in an overcrowded house and not ideal for raising a child. OP didn't want a termination, the family didn't think having a baby was for the best. Posters were telling OP it was her body her choice, to have the baby and tough luck basically to everyone else, they would have to suck it up

Those posters were correct. Nobody should be forced to have either a termination, or a baby if they don't want to.

Bikingbear · 18/09/2020 12:02

Yip Dustyphonix people just don't seem to get that workplaces are trying very hard with SD, screens, and trying to keep their staff safe no workplace wants to end up on 6o'clock news for being center of an outbreak.
Nobody in a private house would have a plastic screen separating people or be as cautious about the virus spread.

Wishimaywishimight · 18/09/2020 12:03

"When someone tells/shows you who they are, believe them" is trotted out on every second thread (exaggeration I know) like it's some wondrous piece of wisdom that hasn't been said 14 million times before.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 18/09/2020 12:04

Ops are always getting told that solicitors give 30 minutes of free advice.

As if they spend their days full of 30 minute appointments giving enough advice for people to solve their problems.

I'm surprised solicitors make any money at all 😂😂

unmarkedbythat · 18/09/2020 12:04

I hate the trans arguments. Or more, I hate when people derail a thread about something else with the endless rehashing of the trans debate.

I hate the "did you mean to be so rude?" saying (the answer will almost always be "yes"). I hate the "it's AUBU what do you expect" if someone is getting really badly treated in a thread there. I hate the impatience if an OP does not post to confirm she has followed given advice immediately.

I have learned some phrases here I really like though!

cctvrec · 18/09/2020 12:05

@StillCoughingandLaughing

It's Scotland not Deepest Darkest Peru. If you're in the UK it hard to believe anyone hasn't had some exposure to hearing or reading something from a Scottish person. They're even on telly!

I know where Scotland is, thanks. How often are Scots saying ‘get to fuck’ on telly? I can’t really see Lorraine Kelly dropping it in when Piers Morgan is doing the handover from GMB (tempting as it may be).

I can pretty much guarantee that, possibly excluding Rab C Nesbitt(?) all those I mentioned would have said get tae fuck quite a lot. On telly. I didn't mention Lorraine Kelly.

Wishimaywishimight · 18/09/2020 12:05

"I didn't want to read and run". Why the fuck not? Who would know? Or care??

CloudPop · 18/09/2020 12:07

@CanaryFish

“You sound awful” Usually about something minor

Over use of the word “lovely”
“Bottle of wine and a lovely card “ as opposed to a bottle of wine and a shitty card ?
“Do something lovely”
I don’t even know why it annoys me it’s totally irrational on my part

And the 2020 entertainment of a lovely walk.

Neron · 18/09/2020 12:12

Nobody was forcing the OP to have a termination, however advising a young girl, with no job and no means of financially supporting herself or a baby, living in cramped and unsuitable conditions - under the guise of your body, your choice - was reckless.

Because having a baby, not being able to support it, feed it, clothe it, house it etc shouldn't be given any additional thought at all. Just OP can do whatever just because it's her body? Absolutely nobody ever points out these things, it's always to go off and do whatever you want because it's your body.

Katyppp · 18/09/2020 12:20

Someone a long way upthread mentioned 'my DH and I work as a tag team' or some such thing.
Yes!!
These briskly-organised types always make me imagine them strutting around the house with a clipboard and holding daily planning meetings with minutes round the kitchen table.
Which I am sure they don't.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 18/09/2020 12:22

Just OP can do whatever just because it's her body?

She can, the alternative is forced abortion

Neron · 18/09/2020 12:29

Just OP can do whatever just because it's her body?

She can, the alternative is forced abortion

If the OP wanted to keep the child, the alternative is to point out what she needs to do, or where she can seek help, for getting herself financial assistance, or to seek a place of her own, if there are shelters or aid services for second hand things etc. You can't tell someone to go ahead and have a child because it tough luck her parents will have to suck it up, house her and child and have to financially support it all because the OP has absolutely no means to do that for herself.

Wishimaywishimight · 18/09/2020 12:30

"Huuuuuige salads" brings to mind "tons of veggies". What is involved here - I'm imaging a small piece of baked salmon with a trough of veg. Most we ever have is 2 - invariably carrots and broccoli...

TinkersTailor · 18/09/2020 12:30

'Omg I just spat my tea/coffee/wine/gin out everywhere'
'I laughed so hard I woke DH/DC up'

^ Any variation of the above, usually posted regarding something that really isn't funny.

Posters dragging up old threads thinking they're hilarious (Did he snap and fart? HAHAHA)

Posters that are vague about things that are really not identifiable.

TinkersTailor · 18/09/2020 12:31

People who start threads with 'so'
I find that incredibly irritating.

ToastyCrumpet · 18/09/2020 12:33

‘Run’. If you Really want to support someone, try being a bit more genuine.

AlternativePerspective · 18/09/2020 12:34

I’m not sure it’s forcing someone to have an abortion by suggesting that having a baby with no home, no job and no money is really not a good idea and won’t be a bed of roses.

The alternative to that is actually something I hate you’ll never regret having this child, but you might regret the abortion...”

Wishimaywishimight · 18/09/2020 12:35

Any poor woman who ventures that actually she hates being a mother, wishes she could have her old life back, is bored witless on maternity leave is asked if she could have PND. Yes of course she might but equally she might just have realised she hates being a mother and would prefer her old life back etc.

I always feel like those women must feel so frustrated and unheard.

Also, getting "5 minutes to yourself" (regularly, and well meaningly, suggested) is hardly going to make an iota of difference is it.

AlternativePerspective · 18/09/2020 12:37

In response to threads about difficult children: “could he be autistic?”

In response to threads about some people doing the unthinkable: “they sound mentally ill.”

The other day there was a thread about a woman who had taken up with a paedophile and had her children removed to her ex’s and she had supervised contact only, sessions which she missed to groom the cat and have a spray tan. And people actually posted along the lines of “it must be devastating for her to have lost custody of her child, this is probably the way she’s dealing with it.” And “she’s obviously mentally ill, be there to support her.”

unmarkedbythat · 18/09/2020 12:37

@Neron

Just OP can do whatever just because it's her body?

She can, the alternative is forced abortion

If the OP wanted to keep the child, the alternative is to point out what she needs to do, or where she can seek help, for getting herself financial assistance, or to seek a place of her own, if there are shelters or aid services for second hand things etc. You can't tell someone to go ahead and have a child because it tough luck her parents will have to suck it up, house her and child and have to financially support it all because the OP has absolutely no means to do that for herself.

You tell someone "it's your body and your choice" because it IS her body and it IS her choice.

You don't try to sway her with "you life will be shit you can't have a baby you have no money" arguments just as you don't try to sway her with "your life will be shit you will be broken by guilt you will never get over it" bullshit arguments.

You can slap down people in a thread who come out with "oh it will all be fine and lovely you will manage we all do the council have to give you a house" rubbish and point out to them that they are talking crap, but to the pregnant woman herself, you do say it is her body and her choice because it is.

You have the right to make a choice I might find unreasonable. I have seen many posts where I think "omg you really should have an abortion!" but I never respond with my opinion, if I respond it is with "it is your choice to make, speak to a professional".