Do I spend too much on toddler hobbies?

[Gailplatt95]

DD is 2, she has horse riding lessons, gymnastics and dance class. This comes to around £130 a month, then any clothes or equipment she needs on top. DP thinks this is too much as when her sister gets older we’ll have to do the same fir her too. I’m unsure, I never had hobbies as a child and I want my girls to have them. I think as she gets older she’ll probably pick just 1 or 2 that she wants to do, then it will become cheaper but at the moment she enjoys all her classes.
What do you spend on toddler hobbies? Is this excessive?

@Puellaincasalaborat no, it's not essential for leadrein riders to be able to rise in trot nor control their ponies (ponies are schooled to look like the rider is doing so but are going off subtle cues from the leader). They'll have ponies at home that they bob about on every day and parents that put hours in to schooling said ponies. They won't be having weekly lessons at the local school. It's still very rare that any of them are 3, lead rein is up til age 9. My daughter did it age 4 and 5 and most were 5+. Also agree with @KarlKennedysDurianFruit re thinking a kit the injury potential as at this very moment we are sat in A&E with a huge queue for X-ray for dd after a pony related incident

I don't think that's too much, especially if she enjoys them!

I also think it's good to try out hobbies from a young age.

If you can afford it I think it's fine.

At two DS did swimming and tumble tots plus other free children's centre playgroups along with soft play. We stopped tumble tots once he went to preschool at 2.5.

Lol your daughter is 2! What's wrong with soft play or meeting up with friends and letting her play in the garden!

Speaking as someone with a lot of experience in childcare and child development

A waste of money! Especially as you say you’re NOT wealthy. We’ve a MAJOR recession looming and you will need money for your dcs future. She won’t even remember all this

B WAY too structured as a pp said free play is far more useful to development at this age and allows her to develop her own personality and likes/dislikes

C too much physical strain potentially exhausting (meaning she’s too tired to develop in other ways) and potentially harmful to a little body, horse riding at this age particularly concerns me, frankly I’d be concerned about the people willing to offer lessons so young and would wonder if they’re legit! I very much doubt reputable insurers would be happy about this!

D your wording suggests this is more about you living vicariously than doing what you genuinely believe is good for her. She is not you or your clone

E over scheduling is harmful to children’s mental health. It teaches them they always have to be “doing something” as someone who was raised similarly and who now suffers extreme mh issues and from witnessing similar as a childcarer of many I think the single greatest gift a parent can give their child is permission to relax!

Down time is HUGELY underrated as is boredom. So so many children would benefit from appreciating boredom on occasion and learning how to relax - a skill that will serve them their whole lives.

Set aside what you’re spending now for when she’s older.

Trust me as soon as she hits high school age when EVERYTHING Becomes so much more expensive you’ll be glad!

Are you saving for dc going to uni? The way things are going economy wise that to me would be a far better idea.

Why doesn’t she go to nursery? Socialising in an environment with trained child development rather than hobby providers would be much more sensible and useful.

She is 2 and you have already stereotyped her into the 'girls' hobbies.

For that alone YABU

Well spotted! - and I agree!

You’re also going to knacker yourself if you try and keep up this level of highly involved parenting to at least 2 dc!

@Graphista for goodness sake - gymnastics like Tumble Tots and dance like Baby Ballet are about 30-40 minute sessions once a week. Far, far less structured than the amount of structure in nursery over a week - is nursery considered extremely detrimental? Most toddlers appear to love these activities

Also, what on earth is gender stereotyping about gymnastics like Tumble Tots and horse riding? I know loads of little boys that go to both, and some that go to dance

I do agree with you though about it possibly being a better use of the funds to save for their future

I agree doesn't need to be structured.

I woukd pay for play sessions but not structured at that age.

Difficulty is what to do instead due to restrictions.

I would pop swimming in their.

Depends how much spare money you have each month.

It’s not good for 2 year olds to horse ride too regularly.

I think she needs some time just to be.
She needs time to be bored, learn to entertain herself and develop her own interests.
These hobbies seem thrust upon her and will become quite pressured imo.
My DC would have preferred to sit in the garden looking for bugs at 2.

@Spied

I think she needs some time just to be. She needs time to be bored, learn to entertain herself and develop her own interests. These hobbies seem thrust upon her and will become quite pressured imo. My DC would have preferred to sit in the garden looking for bugs at 2.

I’m sure she can do all that as well. Three activities a week are nothing out of a whole week spent at home, the garden, the park, just being.

I'm sure she enjoys the activities, but does she enjoy them more than a stay and play group (£4 per month) or music class (£16 pm) or visit to the farm (£50 for the year)?

My 3 year old is very happy doing these things and while I'm sure she would enjoy pony riding and gymnastics too, they're not worth the money at this age. Save it for when they're older and can choose hobbies for themselves and actually learn something from it.

or visit to the farm (£50 for the year)?

Gosh our local farm is £1 for the year for whole family!

I was going to to say £130 is around what I pay for my DD but just read she’s 2 whilst mine is 13 and includes activities such as music lessons which has to practice for and wants to take part
It’s silly amount for someone who can’t even go to the loo alone.

Gosh there are some ridiculously ott posts on here. I suspect the activities are 45 mins max out of her day and the gymnastics and dance will be tailored to the development of toddlers. Horse riding is potentially more questionable but at 2 the gymnastics coaches won’t be drilling them.

This is a child that doesn’t go to nursery so will have hours to potter and play with leaves.

A few people have mentioned just playing with friends/playgroups and stay and plays

I agree these are actually probably far more fun/beneficial overall, but none of them have been available for six months and probably won't for next six months either

None of my friends are up for a play date and rightly so probably although we really miss it

I think the idea of ‘too much’ is subjective, but I would second there being very little value in riding lessons at that age. An occasional pony ride is one thing, but as a rider myself, I only started my kids having lessons at around 5. Before then, they don’t really grasp much, and are only really holding on.

Well the horse has already bolted if you've picked riding as a hobby in terms of cost!!

If I could afford it I would. Like you op I never did anything and really wanted to so I want to guve my kids every chance to try hobbies. My daughter started dance at 2.5 and still loves it. I think it’s great for them. Older kids who started in her class didn’t stick at it for long, but starting young means it’s part of her life now and whilst she’s not going to have a career out of it, she has some lovely friends and a second family in the teachers, and something away from school to enjoy.

I personally think even if I could have afforded that when my dc were younger it is too much. My dc at that age did tumble tots once a week.

My teens currently get £35 a month each spent on them for hobbies so the £130 seems excessive to me for a tiny tot.

I get that some people can afford more than others but even so that amount seems crazy especially if you would struggle to match it for dc 2.

It’s up to you, and her - is it for her? Or your benefit? Does she really enjoy it?

My DS did baby classes when I was on mat leave, and we’ll resume swimming when Covid-19 allows, but the hobbies you’ve listed sound more suited to older children - not a 2 year old.

I’d give her a break and just let her be a little toddler. The park, sandpit and days out with her family should be more than enough at her age.

Don’t do too much too soon; you may overwhelm her.

"Then it will become cheaper"

Horse riding definitely gets more expensive

I dont remember spending anything on toddler hobbies but my son did not know what day of the week it was as a toddler let alone what hobbies he wanted to do at that age but as long as you can afford it and your toddler wants to do it then spend what you like

My 2 year old had a swimming lesson once a week pre-Covid (still waiting for it to restart).

I think a lot of the activities at that age are for the parent's benefit, not the child's. You can get out and about and meet similar minded parents.

If you enjoy taking her and you can afford it then what's the harm?