Do I spend too much on toddler hobbies?

[Gailplatt95]

DD is 2, she has horse riding lessons, gymnastics and dance class. This comes to around £130 a month, then any clothes or equipment she needs on top. DP thinks this is too much as when her sister gets older we’ll have to do the same fir her too. I’m unsure, I never had hobbies as a child and I want my girls to have them. I think as she gets older she’ll probably pick just 1 or 2 that she wants to do, then it will become cheaper but at the moment she enjoys all her classes.
What do you spend on toddler hobbies? Is this excessive?

@draughtycatflap

We live in a deprived area so it’s playing skittles with the discarded helium capsules round the back of Argos for us.

🤣🤣🤣

I really can't believe that a licenced riding stables would be giving actual lessons to a 2 year old. Sitting on a pony for a walk up and down is certainly not a riding lesson, it is more akin to having a ride on a beach donkey with regard to any skills it might be teaching. If the premises are not licenced op, take care, because it probably means they are not insured either.
And you had better hope that she doesn't get bitten by the riding bug, because it is a very, very expensive hobby and will cost you way north of £130 a month!

I wouldn't want my toddler doing too much structured activities, as it seems to stunt creativity and ability to play on their own, create their own games/explore imagination.

The odd lead rein pony ride, and dancing if she enjoys it. Gymnastics only in a very informal setting with lots of toys and games along the lines of tumble tots.

Swimming is essential and life saving and should come before all else, gaining confidence at a young age will mean your child is ready to learn alone once she has the upper body strength.

Nature walks and art is also important at this age, learning to love the world around them. Story telling and reading to dd every day also essential.

It’s a lot for a 2yo, she won’t be getting much benefit from horse riding lessons age 2, she is really just going for a pony ride, it’s the kind of activity she’d be better off starting age 7+ When she is physically able to progress. These activities may be affordable now because she is just at the introductory level but they will become much more demanding on your time and pocket once she gets further down the line.

@MaryShelley1818

I find that level of structure really sad for a toddler. She's 2! Walk in the woods, dig in the mud, play in the sand pit etc 2yr olds should be out exploring and learning about the world.

I feel confident that the activities only take up a small proportion of the child's time.

I think it all sounds fine. My dc had probably done 50 different activities by the time they were ten. Usually swimming lessons and something else. Make sure you give her the opportunity to try other things as she gets older and these 'hobbies' as you call them are ones you have chosen.

I do agree that they are all quite stereotypical though. Like Enid Blyton activities.

@reedwarbler totally agree. At 2 all the little ones can do is hold onto the saddle with a leader and a grownup alongside in case they topple sideways. Our local BHS stables used to let DH and I lead our DD around at 2 FOC because I had ridden there. Structured lessons for her from around 3 which were about 20 mins. Think you might be getting ripped off OP.

DH grew up in a family with horses and thankfully despite MILs differing opinion, felt it had a negative impact on his childhood, it's a very big commitment unless you can easily afford full livery, every day bookended by the stables whatever the weather, and either way a huge financial commitment. Whilst I had opportunities to ride when younger (my youngest aunt has always had horses) , I was never particularly enamoured, add to that MILs now sewn in shoulder, my aunt's lumpy collar bone and my cousin's metal plated hip (all from numerous riding incidents), it's not something we'll be encouraging DS to engage with.
He does swimming lessons, music/movement group and just before lockdown had started toddler gymnastics which he loves, the plan was to decide whether to drop moo music of it was too much in a week, as he also does one day at nursery but then lockdown and none of the groups have started back yet. That comes to around £100 a month, but he is a planned only so we don't have to worry about matching it for a second. It really depends on your income, we could afford to double it and not go without could you? Is spending that amount on activities affecting other aspects of family life? Does your child enjoy them?

Hobbies are things you choose to do. A 2 year old doesn’t have hobbies. They have activities their parents choose to take them to.
Personally I would save the money and let her choose for herself when she’s older.

I’m just impressed you all have so many options for things to do with toddlers! I’m in Scotland and everything is still shut.

He had plenty of books and we read every day, he is at the park and the beach where we live multiple times a week and we have a family pass to our local aquarium and charity petting zoo, his speech, gross and fine motor skills are all good for his age and he is sociable and happy. Activities haven't stunted his development ffs! Swimming is 40 minutes, gym an hour music group 45 minutes that's really not a lot in a whole week, it's not like he's also got a full time job to fit in.....

I think my eldest at two had no 'hobbies'; the youngest at two joined the then eldest and had swimming lessons.
Maybe the gymnastics you mention is more like tumble tots?
Honestly I think that's quite a lot of structure there OP.

Sounds reasonable to me!

How have you managed to get a 2 year old riding lessons? No good riding school in the UK would take them unless they were 4 or over, some of them can't even afford the insurance for that. Plus lead rein lessons which is what she'd be getting shouldn't be happening right now.

Guessing you're either not in the UK, you've bought her a pony, you lied about her age or you're going somewhere quite dodgy. I'd be leaving if none of the first 3 options are true.

Sam Faiers (not a fan before anyone attacks me!) has had her little girl doing riding lessons since 2.

Tbf, they aren't hobbies (defined as activities done for pleasure in leisure time) since a 2 year old isn't in a position to choose.

They are activities, a more expensive extension of the tumbletots / baby massage / library rhymetime sessions some patents structure their days around on maternity leave. All perfectly valid as a way of organising the week, filling and varying the days, and giving your child experiences they might enjoy and skills they can develop and possibly continue into later life.

As to whether you are spending too much, that entirely depends on your household budget and is definitely a conversation you need to have seriously. Could you afford this for two children? Is it how you choose to spend your money?

Just on the riding, my daughter is 2 and we look after a friend's pony on our yard together a couple of times a week and she has a little ride down the lane with me leading. We even did a little show there with a fun class on the lead rein and she seemed to really enjoy it. She always asks to go and ride so don't feel it's being forced and it's a nice way for us to spend some time outside as playgroups etc all closed and we look after the pony in return which she probably likes as much (brushing and mucking out etc)

I agree she wouldn't benefit from actual lessons though

KeepingPlain I’d be interested in that as well. I’ve taken my daughter to a stables that has specialised in starter rides for little ones and they have upped the minimum age due to Covid restrictions and won’t take the under 4s anymore.

Stop constructing a mini-adult and let her be a baby, it's gone too soon .

IMHO children today live lives that are far too structured and timetabled with organised activities. If mass socialisation was a good thing, why are so many teens today stressed out by their own peers?

Emotional resilience and confidence in children might be better developed by spending more time alone and unsupervised, building their own rich interior world from the ground up, in their own imaginations. (NOT, forcefed second hand junk via a screen).

@2bazookas surely what OP describes most likely amounts to 3 or 4 hours a week, if that? Plenty of other time for free play but gives toddler an experience outside of house/immediate outdoors as well

Nurseries are presumably more structured

@Sailingblue

I'm surprised they even did that before covid, it will cost them a lot in insurance for under 4s. Other places won't take under 4s because of insurance costs and some say under 5/6. I ended up going to a very dodgy place when I was 3/4 because I wanted lessons but the better place wouldn't take kids my age. Bad choice by my parents obviously but I mean that was 30 years ago, insurance costs have only increased since then.

If you can afford it and she genuinely enjoys the activities then why not? My daughter was signed up to many activities but over lockdown we had a discussion due to financial worries on what she really wanted to return to and we have only re-joined 1 out of 5 things. Once your younger one gets into different activities as well it gets busier for you to cart them around and wait for the appropriate age groups. For instance the older one might have dance for an hour, you come back an hour later then it’s the younger girls turn. It can eat into a weekend with several activities

My son is 3, he does a dance class each Saturday morning for an hour. In the afternoon we go to the beach or the park or swimming if it's wet. Sunday we chill. 3 days a week in nursery. Dance is about £40 a month all in.

He'll be adding on gymnastics in January to make it 2 hours on a Saturday morning.

I don't think it's too much but it is a lot of money. Maybe ditch horses till she's older to save some cash and compromise with DP.

A nursery will have far, far more structured activities. Three activities a week is not much if you can afford it and she has fun. They’re not “hobbies”, though.

she doesn’t go to nursery so this is time she gets to spend socialising too

I wouldn't call it socialising at all Im afraid, the horse riding I presume is DD seeing a horse in front of her and an adult to her side, the gymnastics and dance, again I would think they have to just listen and copy.

I dont know, maybe swimming with friends, walking in he woods with friends and soft play would be more sociable for her?

I’ve ridden since I was born. I was essentially strapped to my dad’s back at first (probably be massively frowned upon now! I’m not even that old 😬) but I’ve been sitting on a pony more or less unaided since 18 months. Never a Shetland, either. They’re unpredictable little buggers and generally too small for the adult leading the pony to comfortably support the small child. But you’re never too young to start riding and she’ll absolutely love it as she gets older because she’ll be extremely comfortable in the saddle. It’s a wonderful hobby. It teaches the merits of hard work, getting filthy and literally getting back in saddle when you fall. Plus the responsibility of caring for an animal that needs you.

Sorry, I just love it and love to see kids starting young.