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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Swore in front of toddler

63 replies

AshamedToddlerMum · 09/09/2020 10:44

I know I was unreasonable! Feeling really low and awful this morning. I said 'ffs'in front of my 16mo when he wouldn't get into the carseat and I was in a rush. His behaviour has suddenly got quite challenging, I think it is a combination of becoming a toddler and teething but it has come as a shock and I am finding it hard to adjust! Temper tantrums, back arching, shouting at every little thing. Waking in the night again too. It's been hard without baby groups, softplay and and limited playdates and he seems quite frustrated at home. Husband being kind but I know he'd never have done that.

Feeling like an awful mother and that I've let him down.

OP posts:
formerbabe · 09/09/2020 10:46

Such a non issue

In the nicest possible way...chill out

BlueJava · 09/09/2020 10:46

Ha ha, I swear all the time and always have done. Neither DC has grown up over-swearing!

LouiseNW · 09/09/2020 10:48

Depends. In his earshot as an aside, not the end of the world.
Addressed directly to him, something to try to avoid in future.

jessstan2 · 09/09/2020 10:48

Forget it, he won't remember.

zigzagbetty · 09/09/2020 10:49

Give your self a break, said with kindness, we are only human, your child will not start picking up swear words from a few said here and there.

RedRumTheHorse · 09/09/2020 10:49

Non issue.

However try to modify your swear words you normally use, to use the less offence ones so if you get annoyed in front of him and something slips out your toddler doesn't repeats ffs.

LizzieSiddal · 09/09/2020 10:53

I wouldn’t worry about the swearing at all. It was a one off and you feel bad about it. It sounds like you need a bit of a break from it all. Can you have some time for yourself, on a regular basis?

Original poster
AshamedToddlerMum · 09/09/2020 10:54

Thanks all. None of my mum friends with babies of a similar age seem to have hit this stage yet so very much feeling out on a limb!

@RedRumTheHorse that's a good idea

@LouiseNW muttered as an aside

OP posts:
SVRT19674 · 09/09/2020 10:55

So have I sworn, chill.

Branleuse · 09/09/2020 10:56

Dont worry about it

sapnupuas · 09/09/2020 10:57

Jesus fucking Christ.

Sindragosan · 09/09/2020 10:58

Its ok until they're about 3/4 and will repeat every word you say.

AryaStarkWolf · 09/09/2020 11:01

Oh Dear, my kids must be scarred for life

Crocky · 09/09/2020 11:02

None of your mum friends have admitted to getting to that stage yet!

SBTLove · 09/09/2020 11:02

So ppl really worry about things like this?
Swearing in front of a baby is not going to set them on the path to delinquency!!
Calm yourself 🙄

LizzieSiddal · 09/09/2020 11:03

Just to make you feel better, my 2 year old old woke me up shouting “that fucking cat” [over and over. shock]. I was mortified, had a quick think and started singing “that lovely cat”, over and over and she thankfully copied me.

It turned out DH has shouted this at the cat as she’d jumped up on the table and licked his toast! It happens, so don’t worry about it.

yecannyshoveyergranny · 09/09/2020 11:07

@LizzieSiddal

Just to make you feel better, my 2 year old old woke me up shouting “that fucking cat” [over and over. shock]. I was mortified, had a quick think and started singing “that lovely cat”, over and over and she thankfully copied me.

It turned out DH has shouted this at the cat as she’d jumped up on the table and licked his toast! It happens, so don’t worry about it.

😂😂😂

I swear more than I don't. It's not like you swore at him, if you'd said 'you fucking toddler. Get the fuck in the seat' then you'd have a problem.

Original poster
AshamedToddlerMum · 09/09/2020 11:10

@SBTLove thanks for the patronising response. I'm a mum having a hard time asking for support on a parenting website and this is your response.

OP posts:
1starwars2 · 09/09/2020 11:10

Ds2 when aged 4 had trouble putting his seat belt on, and said ffs! Loudly! I was a bit mortified as DS1s lovely friend was in the car. I expect he had heard me say it.
He is 11 now and generally doesn't swear.
You need to find some exclamations you are happy for your child to copy:
Eg For Goodness Sake
Etc

Original poster
AshamedToddlerMum · 09/09/2020 11:11

@LizzieSiddal haha with two cats at home I can relate.

I suppose it's not really the swearing so much as the loss of control which freaked me out.

OP posts:
sqirrelfriends · 09/09/2020 11:12

Non issue, I occasionally swear in front of DS by accident but always follow up by telling him mummy said a bad word and that I shouldn't have done it.

Last week I had to throw on my brakes (and shout FUUUUU*K!) on the motorway due to someone pulling in front of me while doing about 20mph less than I was. "You said naughty word, mummy!!!"

Chickychickydodah · 09/09/2020 11:12

On a lighter note, my daughters first out loud word was Dickhead . She had heard me mutter it in the car a few days earlier and said it when we got cut up by another idiot in a car. I didn’t respond and she never did it again but my ex went mad. 🤣

SBTLove · 09/09/2020 11:13

@AshamedToddlerMum
Mind and tag the other pp that said similar.
Maybe don’t post if you can’t take sarcasm or anyone disagreeing with you.

vodkaredbullgirl · 09/09/2020 11:13

They wont remember.

SomewhereEast · 09/09/2020 11:16

Honestly, it happens. If you want a real horror story, my teenage uncle & his friends thought it would be hilarious to teach toddler me to swear, which resulted in me (with a big smile on my face) telling a very sweet old lady to fuck off at the seafront one day when I was three. This is still told as a funny story in my family MN would definitely not approve of my family

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