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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel in despair for the kids

448 replies

JudesBiggestFan · 08/09/2020 16:09

My son was one of 400 children sent home from two bubbles in his high school today to isolate for 14 days. He's in Year 7 and it was his fourth day in his new school.
He'd been catching the bus, made a new friend, had settled in so much better than I hoped after the past few chaotic disrupted months. And now he's home again.
Not only that, he is now going to miss his cricket presentation and first two football matches of the season, not be able to see friends and family, all for the pleasure of three days of schooling.
And I can see this happening over and over and over again. Luckily childcare isnt an issue as I work from home, but I'm just so sad for kids missing out. Six months off and it seems we're back where we started with no end in sight

OP posts:
Witchcraftandhokum · 08/09/2020 21:18

XingMing the lives of my entire family, who barring my sibling are all over 70 are not less important than your children.

Codexdivinchi · 08/09/2020 21:19

@Witchcraftandhokum

Codex it's not odd, it's a shambles. The parents (neither of whom drive) were directed to a testing site in Scotland today, we're in the North East of England. It's 140ile round trip.
Bloody ridiculous
Oaktree55 · 08/09/2020 21:19

@Codexdivinchi as I said sociopaths. 40,000 plus excess deaths in U.K. due to incompetence. What is wrong with you?!?!?

walksen · 08/09/2020 21:20

ihearttc

"What I don’t understand is we were originally told sustained face to face contact for 15 mins to catch the virus,"

15 mins plus between 1m and 2m and any exposure less than 1m but especially face to face can count as close contact.

For all we know contact trace might have found it was caught at a party with loads of peers present so it becomes impossible to identify all close contacts.

Original poster
JudesBiggestFan · 08/09/2020 21:21

I know a few people asked - no, other siblings at the school don't have to isolate and should carry on going in if they're not in year 7 or 8. No other member of the household has to isolate unless they get symptoms and whether the child dies or doesn't get a test, they still won't be allowed in school until after 14 days. One teacher and their son tested positive.

OP posts:
Ugzbugz · 08/09/2020 21:22

How are working parents supposed to support blended learning???

All this using hotels etc is all and good but where would we get double the amount of teachers? Who is going to organise and pay for all the transport and the TAs and Senco etc? There is so much more to it than teaching maths in an empty hotel.

XingMing · 08/09/2020 21:24

DS being 21 is likely to survive contracting COViD. But he and DP are all the close family I have.

Original poster
JudesBiggestFan · 08/09/2020 21:25

God, horrendous typo! That should say does or doesn't get a test!Confused

OP posts:
ihearttc · 08/09/2020 21:26

But it’s illogical to actually assume that all those children have been in contact with that person especially as for most it’s a mild illness. And yes I realise about vulnerable people but this is not sustainable for anyone. Shops/workplaces don’t close when one person tests positive and they have all been in contact, it’s only the close contacts that have to quarantine.

smogsville · 08/09/2020 21:27

@BatSegundo well I have asthma, I don't know if that counts? But jn any case I find this 'lock themselves away' narrative a bit misleading. I am not advocating doing away with all the enhanced hygiene we're all now very used to, masks on transport in shops etc ie everyone doing best they can to reduce transmission. But if what it essentially comes down to is pupils suffering yet more interruptions to their schooling and all the associated disadvantages or vulnerable groups taking more steps to protect themselves and regrettably some more deaths specifically from the virus then yes to answer your question, reluctantly I would choose the latter. It's your prerogative to take a different view of course.

Codexdivinchi · 08/09/2020 21:28

I’m not a sociopath. I have empathy for people I have helped with debt in the past, I have empathy for my friends who are looking at bankruptcy.

I have empathy for my friends brother who is in a coma after a RTA and non of his family are allowed to sit with him.

I have empathy for a lady in my village who’s son is a child in a residential care home due to special needs and she’s not been able to see him for SIX months. He is 11

I have empathy for the thousands of elderly people in care homes who were basically wrote off and left to die with out even having a confirmed positive COVID test.

I have empathy for children having their most important school years ruined because of a virus that’s already done it’s worst.

Witchcraftandhokum · 08/09/2020 21:28

ihearttc people are wearing masks in shops

walksen · 08/09/2020 21:29

This is a virus which for most is like a common cold. It is harmless to the vast majority of people yet our country has shut down and kids are being damaged.

Since half the country are over 45:and for that age group covid can double the chances of you dying that year if you catch it it is clearly more dangerous than a cold.

ihearttc · 08/09/2020 21:31

@Witchcraftandhokum

Children are also wearing masks in schools, DS1 is in Y11 and has to wear one all day including within lessons. My point still stands, there is no need to quarantine all those children for one positive case.

Witchcraftandhokum · 08/09/2020 21:32

Current advice for schools from PHE is masks are optional in communal areas but should not be worn in classes.

upsidedownwavylegs · 08/09/2020 21:34

@Witchcraftandhokum

XingMing the lives of my entire family, who barring my sibling are all over 70 are not less important than your children.
You’re using personal pronouns to make your point, but actually on a society level they pretty much are.
Notthefutureyet · 08/09/2020 21:37

Fuck sake they should be able to test suspected cases and then they can go back to school if negative. How often do kids get coughs and colds through the year!

Do you and anyone else in the house also have to isolate OP?

Notthefutureyet · 08/09/2020 21:38

Sorry didn't read your last post!

Witchcraftandhokum · 08/09/2020 21:39

You’re using personal pronouns to make your point, but actually on a society level they pretty much are.

That's it. I'm done.

Oaktree55 · 08/09/2020 21:39

@Codexdivinchi good examples of collateral damage. I get frustrated with the over simplification of the problem we are faced with. You are right there are many extended hidden casualties from this and there’s no easy answer. I personally feel that many aren’t facing up to the reality of the situation or are unwilling to alter their behaviour.

It’s all pretty shit at present. It won’t be forever and I think positives will come from it for future generations eventually. Rightly or wrongly I get annoyed by the denial by many and also very saddened by the attitude that it’s ok for some to die so other can continue their lives uninterrupted.

Elemenopeeee · 08/09/2020 21:40

Blended learning isn’t a real option for working parents. As much as i would love to jack in my horrible job and dedicate my time to educating my daughters, I have a mortgage to pay. In lockdown the stress of working and “educating” almost broke me in half. I did my best. I was a shit parent and a shit employee. My mental health went to shit. My marriage almost went to shit.

That was not sustainable. It just wasn’t.

BeijingBikini · 08/09/2020 21:42

it’s ok for some to die so other can continue their lives uninterrupted

But is it OK for people to sacrifice their freedoms, health, jobs, livelihoods, education, hobbies, way of living and quite likely their own future life expectancy, to save the lives of mainly 85+ year olds?

TableFlowerss · 08/09/2020 21:44

@Oaktree55

What I’ve found most disturbing about this pandemic is the number of sociopaths amongst us who demand their normal at the expense of others lives. I now understand how the atrocities of history started.
Quite - but from the other perspective.

People thinking it’s perfectly fine to screw up our children’s education, cause them MH problems because they’ve had no social interaction etc.....when the virus doesn’t even affect them.....

Sorry that some people see it as the young sacrificing for the older ones!

Stompythedinosaur · 08/09/2020 21:44

You’re using personal pronouns to make your point, but actually on a society level they pretty much are.

That is a terrible point of view. I strongly disagree!

m0therofdragons · 08/09/2020 21:44

It’s shit and my kids are more emotional now than they were through lock down as at that point everyone was equal now dc will miss stuff friends outside their bubbles won’t.