AIBU to start a Go Fund Me page for a private diagnosis for DS?

[squirrelnut]

I’m feeling really low at the moment so possibly not the best time to post in AIBU but I need honest opinions!

I want to start a go fund me page to raise money for my DS (5) to pay for a private ASD assessment. It’s £2000 which is more than we could ever afford.

I’ve been battling with the NHS since he was 9 months old. He has a very complex history of trauma whilst I was carrying him and I also have mental health problems so the stick tends to get pointed at me and it’s either poor parenting or attachment issues (for which zero support or understanding is available). I have 3 older children who have no similar issues.

DS currently has no proper diagnosis other than development delay which is preventing us from accessing the right support for him. I don’t think he fits neatly in one box and so we really need professional help and someone who takes the time to conduct a thorough assessment of his needs.

CAMHS have been terrible and for years refused the referral and the one time they did accept, I had a meeting with them (without DS) and they promptly discharged him!

So tell me AIBU to start a go fund me page as it feels an uncomfortable thing to do.

do it op. most of the posters who wouldn’t are probably not in your position

No, I don’t think you can ask strangers/friends to fund an assessment as you disagree with CAHMS
I would absolutely help a friend out and I don't see it as begging at all.
I dont see the problem. You are not asking an individual directly, just putting the info out there and people can choose to respond.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

@FO70 your posts are very informative, I am guessing you are an Ed Psych? Can I just ask, and others might find this helpful too (and there is clearly a lot of misinformation out there):

• you have said Ed Psych can provide the holistic care by which I am guessing you mean in relation to home life as well as school life - Clin Psychs do the same thing, is that right? So - what are the key differences between the two specialisms, in terms of their training and also their practice?! thank you!

• you have mentioned that both the above are protected titles and that doctorates are required as part of training - is work experience also required before the protected titles can be used, or any other requirements?

• if a parent wants someone to come into their home to watch the dynamics at home and provide directive parenting strategies based on observations, do they need a Clin or Ed Psych? And what is the best way of finding one with experience in relation to their particular problems, or a special area such as fostering or adoption, if they do not have personal recommendatons?

• the OP has mentioned (and the Ed Psych report which has been done already) that attachment/connection and her own MH issues were highlighted as problems but that she has been offered no further help - what can she do if the same thing happens?

I hope you don't mind all these questions, I see so many parents on here wanting help and not knowing the best way of getting it.

I work on a private diagnostic team and in my experience, a private diagnosis is now given equal weight - years ago it was a battle.

With Covid, we are seeing an uptick in referrals, including referrals from the nhs themselves, who can’t get through their lists.

I’d say you should do it.

BPS membership doesn’t really count for much other than meaning that the EP/CP in question has decided to pay membership dues for a fancy magazine and being able to call themselves chartered!

@FO70 I am querying this. BPS is a recognised professional association. It's not just a case of paying the fee and 'being chartered'. Becoming chartered in most professions happens when you have the recognised training.
Are you a psych yourself?

It's not just a case of paying the fee and 'being chartered'. Becoming chartered in most professions happens when you have the recognised training I think she meant you can't be registered with BPS as Ed or Clin Pscyh without the relevant training/qualification, but that you do not need to be registered with BPS in order to practice as an Ed or Clin Psych.

jingling I am not getting in the way of your querying with the other poster, but what is your professional background and experience?

@traumatrauma 40 years in education incl assessing for certain conditions and working with ed psychs.

@JinglingHellsBells thank you, that is helpful. Some of what you have said here has been slightly misinformed - is that because things have changed or just because you have had no personal experienced of clinical psychologist and so were not aware of their professional status?

I’m in Guildford, there’s a testing site in my town and one nearby at Chessington. Tried to get a test last week and only place available was Newport - 106 miles away! So I ordered a home test.

Had no idea you could just turn up at a testing centre - according to google, the two near me say appointment only.

Sorry wrong thread!

@traumatrauma feel free to correct anything if you think it's incorrect. Not really happy about detailing my career path or history here as it's a bit off topic.