AIBU to think it doesn’t hurt anyone else if I don’t send daughter back to school !

[Longestride25]

Hi
I have decided to not send DD ( 7 ) back to school next week. She was in the shielding group.
After waiting to see how things go ( numbers in our area are increasing ) I have personally decided she will stay at home and we will wait and watch.
However this seems to cause an offence in any parents asking me if she is going back
“ well we can’t keep them of ever it’s getting stupid “
“ the schools needs to open for our kids mental health “

I could keep going 😂

But I am not saying not to open schools, I am not telling them to not send their children to school so why do they need to justify their reasons to me or make me feel like my decision is wrong !

Ultimately though you still didnt you?

Of course I did. But I don't live in the false belief there was no impact on anyone else.

Its part of the job though isn't it? I mean its not extra ? Its not something no one expects to never do.

So I dont agree that the teacher isn't impacted in the sense of having to do something thats not his or her job in the first place.

It also wouldn’t be her teacher. Her 1-1 is there for all her needs. She isn’t even included in class numbers on school trips etc

TBH your situation is different if her attendance was only 30% before lockdown. Sounds like she was hardly there anyway. Maybe you’re coming across to other parents that you’re doing this due to covid rather than stating the fact she has always had 70% homeschooling and all your doing is now making it 100%?

I know a family where the DS has had a kidney transplant - he won’t be going back to school.
I can’t think anyone has anything but sympathy for the family (who have frankly suffered enough for ten families).

It varies the year before her attendance was better, her attendance depends on how long she is in hospital for the 30 percent was for this year before lockdown so September to March but she has was on hospital for 12 weeks. My decision is based on the covid situation of covid didn’t happen she would be going back Monday. Her attendance is never above 50 percent though that was in reply to the comment about how she is wasting a space.

@HelloMissus similar situation although diff organ and we are still
On transplant list waiting for a match .

Its part of the job though isn't it? I mean its not extra ? Its not something no one expects to never do.

I'd never expect to have to reintegrate upto 20% of a year group after a pandemic so no, not really part of the job.

Just smile and say ‘we are happy with our choice”.
I home ed and people just love to give you their opinion. Usually strangers who have no idea about home ed.

What do you mean up to 20 percent ?

But integrating traveller children/military children and sick/disabled children is part of the job though isnt it?

No one expected covid ajd yes thats additional work I'm.sure is incredibly challenging however other illnesses and disabilities and situations didnt disappear because there was a pandemic

I think it is entirely up to individual circumstances and nobody else's business. Your daughter is shielding and, I presume, is quite happy, ie not displaying mental health problems from being at home.

Re-assess at half term.

long then very good luck to you and yours.
Honestly, you have bigger fish to fry right now than what a few people say (especially as those people appear to have no imagination).

If you need an answer - our consultant says it’s not okay - is more than enough.

@Whatwouldscullydo
Thankfully I think most teachers would really not bat an eye lid SD given extra support to a child with complex
Health needs. Thank god.

But integrating traveller children/military children and sick/disabled children is part of the job though isnt it?

Yes it is. Not sure where I've said it isn't.

We're expecting 20% non attendance who will need reintegrating. Normal years less than 1% so pretty big change in workload.

OP I want to reiterate I think you are making a good decision for your circumstances.

Oh our senco at yesterday’s meeting ( school went back Thursday ) said her class attendance was high apart from 3 who have left the class completely 😂maybe they got lucky !
To be fair the risk assessment of daughter being in class seemed far harder to manager staff wise than her intergrating back in.

I haven't read all the comments but just want to say it's no one else's business if people are keeping their kids home or sending them back to school.

It's a strange time for everyone and I wish people would stop judging everyone else's tiniest movement and concentrate on their own.

If my child was in the shielding group, I'd keep them home. It's not the school but other people you have to rely on following the rules. The stakes are not high if you have a healthy child (low risk of getting very sick) that changes once you add in other medical conditions.

FWIW I think it sounds from what you describe like you’ve made a very sensible decision. Everyone’s decision is different because everyone has different circumstances. Some people don’t “get” that.