Dear God please help me chick

[quantumdog]

Help me to work out a way to nip this madness in the bud please.
Newish partner refers to me as 'chick'. I don't know why, but this really winds me up and I'm losing all respect for him.
I'm not a 'chick'. I'm not newly hatched, I'm 40 and I've been around the block a few times. 😆
For context, this evening he's said 'Would you like another drink Chick?' and 'Sounds like you had a great week Chick', amongst many more chick type references.
He's so lovely and I know I should just tell him, but I've already had to reign him in on other things in the last few weeks, so to bring this up now would just feel pedantic.
Could you suggest a way of pulling him up on this without causing offence please? A witty riposte perhaps, or a nickname to counter this that I could call him?
Or am a just being utterly ridiculous? I mean, there are far worse things he could call me...right?

If someone was saying I dated some chick, bird etc I wouldn’t like that at all. If using it as a personal term of endearment it’s not bad however you don’t like it. You just need to tell him to please stop as you don’t like it and it’s spoiling what is a nice time together. If you can’t communicate such a minor thing to him then it’s over before it’s started.

You seem like someone with very strong views and ideas but you just can’t articulate yourself well. Nothing he has done so far is awful but they are awful for you. I assume you say nothing because you know you are very abrupt as you have posted upthread. I’m also a to the point person I have found holding back a lot will simmer resentment and if you keep holding it when you do say something it will probably be too harsh.

You need to learn the positive negative positive sandwich. So something like, we have been having a great time together but I’m struggling with the pet name of chick as I don’t like it and would like you to never use it again then I won’t have to fret you will use it again and we can carry on together having an even better time together.

Now some on here may think that’s overkill but if you are so abrupt to the point of rudeness and you write it contributed to the breakdown of your marriage it needs dealing with. I was really abrupt, I still have to check myself If you are truly as bad as I was then it really is a case of retraining yourself.

I think if he's a nice man, and he really sounds like he is, your choices really are to either tell him that you're not a fan or decide it's something you can live with. Some of the suggestions have really made me chuckle but I think indirectly trying to get the message across by clicking etc is more likely to lead to problems than just saying something as it drags it out.

In your shoes I would think honesty is the best policy, I would want to know if I was calling my partner something that made them feel icky. It doesn't need to be said crossly, just say you're not a fan. I doubt he'll mind!

I don’t find chick, I bloody hate Duck!

You'd do a lot better saying "Please don't call me chick, it gives me the shudders" than doing any of these ludicrous passive-aggressive suggestions, or just trying to bottle it up. JFDI, chick.

Thank you all for your responses. I'm badly hungover today but have taken everything on board. I bollocked him last night for 'saying I love you too much'. 🥴 I think I'll wait a few days and then politely ask him to come up with another pet name, or better still just use my actual name.

How long have you been together? You say in your op that he's newish and then in another post he's telling you he loves you too often. Is he love bombing you?

Coming up to a year now. That's newish to me.
Sometimes I do feel love bombed, hence me telling him to stop with the over attentiveness and love confessions. I haven't said it yet, even though I do think I love him too.

Gosh you seem to have a lot of rules for him. You've had to have words, rein him in and now bollock him because he gave you a car and tells you he loves you. Then in a few days you'll have to have to have a polite word with him about calling you chick. Genuinely, maybe you just aren't well suited? Or you have very different expectations from a relationship? You obviously don't like these certain things about him but (and I appreciate it's a very big but as we don't know the man) he seems to be very fond of you and doing rather nice things for you. Again, we don't know him but he seems like a kind man, but all of his kindness seems to irritate you (not the pet name thing, if you don't like it that's fair enough). Can you see yourself with him long term if his telling you he loves you is so annoying? He shouldn't have to change who he is to be with you, not that there's anything wrong with either of yours preferences, but it doesn't seem quite fair that you're telling him off so much for just expressing to you how he feels.

You don't feel able to tell him gently that you don't want to be called chick but you're okay bollocking him for telling you he loves you?

I'm genuinely not trying to be goady OP but honestly... You really don't seem to like him very much? 😬