To ask your most WTF moments

[latheritup]

We went to the zoo recently and was walking down to the tiger enclosure. We saw a man had jumped over the fence into the greenery to retrieve his glasses that 'fell off' and subsequently the tigers all came to the front of their enclosure.

I can't think why he wouldn't ask a zookeeper to safely get them or was he just trying to get the tigers closer for a better pic?! Either way my face was

I've attached a wonderful diagram. Very proud of it

I was having a nap before a nightshift and woke to something chapping on my kitchen window (stayed on 3rd floor flat) was very confused went to see what it was and here it was a seagull banging its beak against the window

@Zoejj77 it wasn’t this many by any chance?

I had a WTF moment myself.
Aged about 3 we lived next door to London zoo and often visited. At the time I was very taken with penguins (still am). Dm was talking to the penguin keeper and I could see these lovely penguins with footballs, there were some with furry jumpers too. I was desperate to play with them, so the under keeper lifted me over. I remember running after penguins who shuffled off very fast with me behind them. Dm looked round and I was apparently halfway over the 'bridge', I remember her being hysterical. I can't quite remember how it ended, I presume the underkeeper went in and collected me. I do remember vividly the disappointment of not being able to play with the footballs or with the penguins with furry jumpers. I remember crying because they wouldn't play, but most of all I remember the telling off I got from dm!

Looking back I do wonder what happened to the young man who lifted me over the fence.

Loving this thread - excellent diagram

The Universe has given me loads of WTF / you couldn't make this shit up moments so I'll try not to bore you.....

On a school trip to Russia aged 17 in 1986 so still Communist era, our group was taken to the big department store pronounced Goom in Moscow ...... suddenly I was punched really hard in the lower back, and turned round to find a very tiny "babushka" ranting in Russian at me, turns out some of the old guard could be VERY anti-Westerner and I was just the nearest available target. Our translator was mortified.....

I had to steel myself for the trip as it was my first experience of flying and I am still pretty jittery about it now. Going out was fab - BA flight, nice food, no turbulence - hell, I can do this I thought. Return flight - an Aeroflot plane which hadn't been out of internal Russia before. Twenty minutes before we arrived at Gatwick we lost a sodding engine. As it cut out the pane dropped dramatically, the seat belt light went on and the air hostesses strapped themselves in and one started praying and crossing herself. When we landed they had to do something compensatory to the brakes, and all the seats sort of went forward. It was terrifying, although I have been lectured on what a minor, low risk experience it was by those who understand aerodynamics....... It felt somewhat - personal.

Back at school, DM and DSDad picking me up - I get off the coach clutching a carrier bag containing illicitly obtained duty free vodka which was their gift (different times, dudes, different times....) and a painted wooden toy for my small cousin, which I dropped on the ground in its entirety...... the vodka melted the toys glue.......

One of my cats calmly jumped up on the kitchen counter one day in front of me and other family with a dead rodent in its mouth which it daintily deposited in one bowl before a starter of biscuits from the other - he then chowed down on said mouse, noisily and keeping it all in the bowl......

Our last shared house had a big garden but was in the centre of our town, and the household was eclectic...... I opened the bedroom curtains one Sunday morning to see about 7 birds of prey, different varieties all on those little hoops things dotted around the garden. A complete stranger was there drinking a mug of coffee, and saluted me with it when I saw him. I actually, really did, shut and open the curtains again. Then woke my DP and we went down to discover one of our housemates had got chatting to a chap in the pub who does the "natural" extermination in the area and who needed somewhere to spend the night where he could park his bird van - which he slept in, and as we had a large concealed "parking area" housemate had invited him back. He gave the birds their breakfast, we got to hold one or two, then he packed up and went on his way. Definitely one of the most surreal but wonderful experiences we'd ever had.....

And just don't ask about the entire WTF filled holiday to Scotland with my Ex DH, or the weekend new DP and I were supposed to be doing Boomtown as traders / performers which went utterly tits up and I then proceeded to break my ankle the next morning resulting in absolute prolonged WTFuckery....... ah, I can laugh about it now......

@latheritup

I am so happy you all like my diagram!

Disclaimer: the faces in the photo do not represent us or the man in real life. I definitely don't have ginger hair

I have thoroughly enjoyed everyone's WTF moments.. hope to read some more!

Oh and I thought you were the curly blonde

@BalloonSlayer I once saw a young bloke on a bus with a rat on his shoulder. He came trotting up the stairs & sat down as we all watched the rat, never taking our eyes off him. Then he got up to get off the bus, the bus did an emergency stop, the rat shot off his shoulder, the bloke was shouting “Raisin, Raisin, get right back here now”. I looked out the bus window & there was Raisin back on the shoulder. It shocked me more that he was shouting Raisin, rather than the rat sitting on his shoulder.

On the same bus but a different time I sniffed & I was horrified when my nose whistled loudly. I couldn’t actually believe it would make such a noise so I dared sniff again, yes it was definitely me. One last time I did it again as I thought surely it could not be me. At that point a young boy came downstairs blowing a whistle. What a relief!

[quote Crazycatlady2020]@Zoejj77 it wasn’t this many by any chance?[/quote]
No @crazycatlady2020 it was a full size sheep not a lamb. It was in the days of no camera phones so no chance of getting a snap of the weird occurrence either

@Eminybob

We were in jersey last week and had to stop the car as a family of chickens were crossing the road. The 6 year old thought it was hilarious

Did you wait to find out why they crossed the road!!??

Many years ago a neighbour, in her thirties then, walked past my house one Sunday morning at 06.30 from another neighbours house further along my road.
Ten minutes later, she came back past my house towards the neighbour where she had come from clutching a packet of bacon.
Not unusual in itself, except that she was absolutely stark bollock naked, not even a pair of shoes on!!
I've had some WTF moments in my time, but that was the biggest WTF I've ever had.

We were invited to a family party in the northern town that I was born in but moved away from, with my southern born DH.

Outside the club we say a guy in a flat cap walking his ferret, then at the party there was a 'comedian' who was so racist it was like a 1970s Bernard Manning set. We made our excuses and left, apparently we didn't have a sence of humour.

@AllTheWhoresOfMalta. We’re not that family - but similar thing. Having a family BBQ when I was a child. my grandparents always used to BBQ and had some serious BBQ equipment. They had a spit roast attachment that held two whole chickens. We’re all sitting around the patio table near the BBQ when up trots a German shepherd that steals the spit roast attachment and the two chickens. We still talk about this today.

I seen this too in Wales.

What? All of it? The naked Germans with cock rings?

Can I include other people's WTF moments?

My carer was in his flat having a nap and heard a noise. He got up and someone was letting themselves in the living room door, from the balcony. He lives on the 6th floor. Bizarrely his reaction was, "sit down while I get some clothes".

Strange bloke had apparently jumped from the balcony above. My carer did not enquire why, he just let the guy out the door into the communal hall way.

I went to an RC girls school run by nuns. The nuns mostly travelled by 'nunmobile' the name we gave to the nun's minibus. Occasionally Sr Mary Dominic would catch the bus.

So Sr Mary Dominic (SMD) was sitting on the bus surrounded by good catholic girls and the bus pulls up to the stop near some flats.

The girls sitting on the same side as SMD all look out the window, the girls on the other side of the bus rush over to SMD's side of the bus.

SMD looks out the window to see a naked man doing a 'helicopter' in the window.

The flasher had been doing this for at least 2 weeks.

The headmistress was not impressed.

I once saw an elderly gentleman riding his mobility scooter along a main road. Oh his head was a peaked, velvet-covered horse- riding helmet with chin strap.

@GreatestShowUnicorn I saw a man with a ferret on a collar and lead outside the National Gallery in London once. It was very sweet and friendly.

Please tell me more... x

I was at an equestrian one day event, watching the cross country phase. A rider had fallen off, unhurt, but her horse was galloping loose, stirrups flapping, Something caught around a leg, totally out of control. Horse ran back towards the start box and a lady stood in front of it, waving her arms and trying to make it stop. Horse ran right over/ through her. I was 😮😮😮. I thought she must have been killed but later found out she was badly injured but survived.

At a wildlife park a week or so ago, and a woman said, oh look at those giant rabbits. They were wallabies

In a Scottish zoo a whole family encouraged their dc to wave to the monkeys
.. Lemurs...
And a wolf was a white fox also..

I once hugged a work colleague I hadn’t seen for a while and she started unhooking my bra. When I said ‘wtf are you doing?,’ she seems utterly baffled and said ‘ive got no idea’

Out for a meeting with my boss, many years ago. Pressed the light to wait for the green man, on a fairly busy road. Suddenly the road completely emptied of traffic, so I stepped out and started to cross.
My boss used his umbrella handle to hook round my arm and pull me back on to the pavement. I just looked at him like I felt about five again, getting into trouble.

Last week while out with DH and DD we were in the car sat at traffic lights when from the back seat my DD said "There's a man over there with a parrot on his shoulder". Sure enough there was, he was just standing looking at his phone with a blue and yellow macaw on his shoulder. At first I thought it might be stuffed then it turned round!

Years ago I lived in a town in Manchester and there was a man who always dressed very smartly but would walk around the town with no shoes or socks on. I used to see him most days getting on the same bus as me. And this was in all weathers. No idea why someone would do that.

I said WTF the first time I saw someone in a supermarket in their pyjamas.

@ChippyDucks150

Out for a meeting with my boss, many years ago. Pressed the light to wait for the green man, on a fairly busy road. Suddenly the road completely emptied of traffic, so I stepped out and started to cross. My boss used his umbrella handle to hook round my arm and pull me back on to the pavement. I just looked at him like I felt about five again, getting into trouble.

Reminds me of Steed and Purdey.

@SchadenfreudePersonified

our 16st Great Dane

Wow!

That's a big dog!

Our dane is 14 st and is considered big - the vet said he was the largest dane he'd seen.

At his last weigh in he was 16.5st I believe. He stood 38 inches tall to his shoulder and not an ounce of fat on him. Biggest Dane we ever had. He lived to 14 years old too but most of our Danes lived til 13 or 14 usually.

Makes us laugh when we see those stories in the paper or on tv about the worlds biggest Great Danes and one article was going on and on about how they'd got theirs to a whopping 8 years old 🙄.
We regret not having him officially measured for the Guinness book but he was just our dog. I may give the vets a call one day and see if they have his records still.