When do you first remember being left home alone

[WomenHour]

I think it was around 9 , my mum had to go to work so she left me and my brother for a few hours.

We moved to a new town a month before my 9th birthday in the Summer holidays. I wasn't on the radar for social services as this was the 80's and they didn't communicate well. So the previous time I had been removed from my parents for neglect meant nothing, I was given a key and expected to find other children to play with whilst my parents were at work most days my mum's hours were 9 until 3 I think because when we were at school the next month she would leave abit before us and be home around an hour after us. My brother was 7.

I don't think that's an appropriate age to be left all day, or to get yourself familiar with a completely new town. No one noticed I guess they had no idea who we were really, just two children wandering around the shops and parks for a few weeks.

I was never home alone as my grandmother lived with us. I've never really given it any thought until now!

During the day for short periods at about 8 or 9. Then for longer and at night at about 11 or 12.

Bliss.

To the local shops alone - 3 years old.
Walking to/from school alone - 5 years old.
Latchkey child - 7 years old.
Alone all day at home during all school holidays - 10 years old.
Babysitting other kids - 12 years old.
Alone for 3 days while parents 300 miles away attending funeral - 14 years old.
I don’t think it was considered an issue at the time (1960’s/70’s)
My own DC have had to be similarly self reliant, as I was widowed when they were babies, and had to get back to full time work as a hospital doctor to support them.

I was 6. I was off school recovering from German Measles, not feeling unwell, and my mum had to go shopping.

It was in the early 60s, when shops shut at 5.30 sharp and my dad didn't get home from work until 6. She was only gone an hour or so, and left me with paper and crayons etc, and a drink. And I was a very boring, sensible and bookish child.

I also remember shutting my sister in the airing cupboard when my mum was at the shops, but the door knob was really stiff and I couldn’t open it. I think we were 6 and 8. It was a looong time before my mum came home

Are you my SIL @Thneedville?

She did exactly that when she was about that age.

Her DD, now 18, loves hearing stories about all the ways in which her mum was very naughty, and far worse than her aunt and both uncles. When she got told off for things, she'd often answer back with "At least I never shut my sister in the airing cupboard/cut her hair/used a felt pen to try and make her into a black baby".

7 . I had tonsillitis and mum went to work for 3 hours. I was quite happy...i had books and lucozade in orange cellophane! This was the mid 60s

If it was for a short amount of time probably from age 9. Once I was about 11 I was home alone after school for a few hours most nights

2... and my sister was 1

6, my mum was a single parent then and needed to get me medicine. She was gone 5mins. I’m still alive.

I think I was about 9 or 10. It was a one off because of something unusual. The key was hidden for me and I let myself in from school. Up until then I felt quite brave and grown up, but once inside the quiet, empty house I began to feel scared and went outside to sit with the dog in his kennel. That feeling has always stayed with me.

9 for short periods of time, About 12 after school and probably 16 for overnight I think.

12. New Years Eve. I had flu, mother just had to go out. She hasn’t changed.

@Sanjii

If SS had known, it would have been an issue of child neglect and possible removal of children.

which ages do you find shocking/a case for SS?

Certainly leaving young children and babies alone at all, older children left all day long. Awful. I remember leaving my 13 year old for a few hours once and feeling so incredibly guilty.

24! There was a good reason though, my Dad was disabled and housebound so even if Mum went out Dad was always there.

I don't remember, but probably 11 or 12. I've followed the same pattern with my dc. It's awful.that so many of you were left so young . People really shouldn't have children if they aren't able or willing to look after them properly.

I think I was 7. I would be left home when off school sick. Also came home from school with a key (walking with siblings, similar age). Nights we would have a babysitter.

I get that leaving a very small child is bad- obviously leaving a 3yo unsupervised is SS stuff in anybody's book. But why do people assume that leaving an older child is also bad and that you should feel guilty even if leaving a teenager? Do people not allow teenagers out on their own either or are their homes so much less safe and pleasant than, say, the town centre?

I had a very pleasant home: spending a few hours alone with books and music was certainly no hardship. By the time I got to my teens I was just as able to cook a simple meal without setting the place on fire as my mother was.

I was about four.

I came out of school once when I was five and my mother wasn't there to meet me and I couldn't find my way home and went into someone's garden.

9 or so, but my parents divorced when l was a kid so l remember being left overnight alone from 13 onwards (had a brother 1 year older there too, so not completely alone, although he was out with his mates most nights)

My mum was a nurse and had to work nights, as part of her contract. It was up to me to come home in the evening, (I used to stay at friends houses after school for a few hours) cook my own dinner, watch Home and Away or Neighbours feed the pets, do the minimum amount of homework, go to bed, set my alarm and get off to school again the next day. If anything it thought me life skills from an early age, that helped me through life as an adult.
Probably would be taken away by social services by todays standards

9 with 7 year old sister but I was very sensible. I used to pick my primary aged cousins up aged 10 , 8 and 5 when I was 14. Id make their tea and wait till their mum got home. I loved it.

About 6. I came home from school, the door was unlocked (common in those days) but no Mum. There was a note on the table "GONE TO CO-OP". I couldn't read the word Co-op and thought it said coop, which made no sense, so had no idea when - if -she would be back.
I was terrified.

Probs about 5, waaay too young and scary experience

First time I was 10 and it was because my eldest brother had been rushed to hospital whilst I was in school. BUT a cousin of my dads was a neighbour and he let me into the house and checked on me every half hour ( was severely allergic to our dog)

Overnight..

Mm, 5 or 6 I think, parents out for a meal, back after midnight, we'd be left with the neighbours listening in via an intercom system, but we are talking a huge 5 bed semi, over 3 floors (and obviously the same next door), Victorian, high ceilings and thick walls so sound did not travel well and by no means did one intercom allow them to hear whatever was going on!

Next door were happy with it... they were a judge and a headmistress...so not crazy risk taking types.

In the car... left to sleep in the car from younger than that outside venues/pubs.

These were not daily occurrences, but common enough not to be remarkable either.

During the day, probably 9 or 10, I remember walking to and from school by myself being a big deal that I got to do at the age of 7, but that was to a home with Mum in it. I didn't have to come home to an empty house until I hit secondary school and she was still at work.

Then at 16 I was home alone for 3 months as she was sectioned and no one really realised I was living on the money I earned dog sitting (20 a week) and the bills went out of her bank via direct debit.

It only became an issue when the dogs owner moved house and I no longer had that cash income, the summer holidays ended and some of my friends parents realised I had no actual parent anywhere... For some reason, and to this day I don't know why, I didn't tell anyone, didn't ask for help at all! I think the hospital assumed her boyfriend was here with me but he actually disappeared off home 300 miles away literally the moment the ambulance left our house.

Fortunately, I had learned a lot about cooking etc and was pretty independant, but it still shocks me thinking back.